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Original poster

What do you do when your child is ill?

45 replies

Listmaker · 17/10/2005 13:44

I have been extremely lucky in that my dds have hardly ever been ill and up til now if they have my mother has been able to look after them. But on Friday dd2 was ill and my mother wasn't able to have her so I had to take the day off.

What do you do in these circumstances? Take it as holiday? Call in sick yourselves or what? I was honest but they say I have to take it as holiday and I don't have many days left and they are all allocated for childcare in half term and at Christmas.

Thanks

OP posts:
codface · 17/10/2005 13:46

you lie and say you are ill
poeple hate kids being ill

Gomez · 17/10/2005 13:46

Take it as holiday/unpaid leave or flexi-time. I wouldn't and don't allow others to use sick leave.

(But then I am a nice boss and don't make them have it unpaid either .)

Hope she is better now.

Original poster
Listmaker · 17/10/2005 13:47

Yeah CF that was the conclusion I was coming to for the next time. Being honest is far too much hassle! Just gonna have to take on of my planned holiday days as sick now instead!!

OP posts:
beansprout · 17/10/2005 13:47

Does your workplace have a policy on parental leave? Might be worth speaking to HR as some employers allow a certain number of days to cover this sort of thing.

Gobbledispook · 17/10/2005 13:47

Agree with Cod - lie

DissLocated · 17/10/2005 13:48

You're entitled to take a day or two off for emergency dependent care but it's unpaid.

Original poster
Listmaker · 17/10/2005 13:49

We don't have flexi time and it's really hard to make up the 6 hours with my childcare etc - would take me about 6 weeks - if they would let me anyway. Unpaid leave would be about the best I could hope for I think. Seems unfair and bound to make people just lie (luckily I haven't had much time off sick myself so am not looking bad from that point of view).

OP posts:
Original poster
Listmaker · 17/10/2005 13:51

Suppose I should count myself lucky that in 8 years this is the 1st time this has happened! Some friends are off all the time. Guess they take it as unpaid leave.

OP posts:
Gobbledispook · 17/10/2005 13:52

If there was a bit more flexibilty and understanding around these kinds of issues, you wouldn't have to lie! You are driven to it

Btw, don't know why I'm arguing, I don't have this problem but it does annoy me on other people's behalf!

DissLocated · 17/10/2005 13:52

That's what I used to do. I'm pleased to say I don't work anymore for exactly this reason, messing about taking days off when the nursery wouldn't take dd and the cat's bottom face my boss used to make when I told her I was going home!

Gomez · 17/10/2005 13:58

Is okay to lie now and again but it can all catch up with you and/or make your personal record look really bad.

You should be entitled to reasonable time-off unpaid. What do others do at your work? Although if you don't know would probably suggest they call in ill too .

butty · 17/10/2005 14:03

If your child is under 5, then by law under the parental legislation, you are entitled to 20 days, unpaid parental leave anually.
I would check this out with your employers!!

Gomez · 17/10/2005 14:05

Butty - parental leave needs to be in blocks of at least 5 days and planned.

Emergency leave is available however which I believe provides for reasonable time of in an emergency to arrange alternative care for a dependent.

The issue is that both are unpaid!

Original poster
Listmaker · 17/10/2005 14:17

I work with mainly men who don't seem to have the problem somehow - funny that! My dds aren't under 5. I've looked it up on out intranet thing and I think there is a facility to take unpaid leave but who would go for that when they can just phone in sick??! I hate lying though and feel really guilty about it all the time.

OP posts:
butty · 17/10/2005 14:18

I understand that they are both unpaid, and as a working mother myself of a SN and an awaiting ADHD DX child, i hate the system and how it works, but i too save my holidays for the holidays and refuse to use them for any other circumstances, and as i have to attend a lot of appointments or my kids are ill, my employer has no problem with me taking a day here and there for parental leave, even at short notice.
it would be much better to be paid for it, but then i made the decision to go back to work!!!

crunchie · 17/10/2005 14:23

I Must be SOOOO lucky, If my kids are ill and I can't get cover I get it taken as MY sick days and paid for it I tell them it is the children, but this is how they do it. I do try to go into work quickly, pick up as much work as poss and do it from home though.

worriedfriend · 17/10/2005 14:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mapleleaf · 17/10/2005 15:04

It's a must lie situation ;-) I have only had to do it once, but there was no way in hel i was going to pay full nursery fees and be home unpaid because dd1 had the chickenpox. The last time dd1 was ill i got dh to take a sick day. I figure by taking turns with dh, it doesn't look so bad !! And if you feel guilty, which admittedly i always do even if i am on my deathbed, think of all of those people who call in sick because they got pised the night before.

RachD · 17/10/2005 15:18

God I'm glad I don't have to worry about all of this.
I get paid hourly.
Am on a years contract.
When Ds had chicken pox, I took a week off, unpaid.

And my firm are so nice about it.

But if I had to.... lie, lie, lie - and don't feel guilty - what about all those drunk sickies, totally fabricated sickies , long lunches etc etc that other employees take ?

Bet they don't feel bad about it !!!!

aloha · 17/10/2005 15:19

lie. I bet you never take a day off with a hangover!

RachD · 17/10/2005 15:42

I drink like a fish aloha - but don't get hangovers !!

Bozza · 17/10/2005 15:52

I'm obviously too honest for my own good. I have had a pretty easy run recently but since DS started school in September I have taken (in 3 installments) a full week of holiday off to look after him. Since I still have to pay for DD's nursery and DS's childminder I cannot afford the unpaid leave. And he is off school today, so I have to decide whether I can send him tomorrow or if more holiday is disappearing in sitting round the house. DH can cover the rest of the week by working at home but has all day meeting tomorrow. Also the childminder is not available this week (her Mum has died) so I will only be able to do half a day anyway tomorrow. And this leads us into next week which is half term and the childminder has booked the week as holiday.

I wouldn't mind but my last actual sick day was one day in March 2004 when I was 7 months pregnant. Thats it for the last two years. Will have to start working the system.

LunarSea · 17/10/2005 16:16

Fortunately I can work from home when necessary, so I just work from home, and make up the time in the evenings/later if necessary.

goldenoldie · 17/10/2005 16:17

We get paid compassionate/family leave. Upto 2 weeks a year I think. Can be taken in individual days too.

Or - can work at home with little notice too.

edhj69 · 18/10/2005 08:47

DW and I share the time off, depends who is appeaaring in court, but like most have to take it as either holiday or unpaid leave, in our jobs we can generally pursuade our respective (not respected) bosses that if we work on a weekend we should get the time back. You do occasionally find yourself debating whether to lie and say you're ill or the kid. The problem is if you are up all night with screaming child the next day you are probably feeling like crap so have to phone in ill makes you look doubly bad.