Internalised misogyny examples please

[StandingDeskDisco]

I have seen the term 'internalised misogyny' flung about on some threads like it is a catch-all gotcha or an all-purposed slur. To me it made no sense whatsoever as a genuine observation in the context of the discussion.
I have even seen a man accused of having internalised misogyny - is that even possible? Surely that is just misogyny?

I understand what the words mean, but not what it looks like.

Internalised: when you take on other people's beliefs. e.g. if your parents always said you were pretty, you will be confident in your looks, but if your sister was always 'the pretty one' while you were the clever / sporty / whatever one, you won't have such confidence. So women can absorb misogynistic beliefs from living in a patriarchy.
Misogyny: hatred or fear of women, females, or femininity.

So what does it look like?

Is it the woman who says she just gets on better with men, and has no female friends?
Is it the woman who only has female friends, never male, and thinks men and women can never be real friends?
Is it the woman who never leaves the house without full make-up and hair and nails done?
Is it the woman who hates all signs of femininity in her clothing, wears plain clothes, and if there is a tiny bow on a new bra she will snip it off.
Is it the woman who climbs the career ladder but never quite feels like she is worth it (imposter syndrome) due to being a woman?
Is it the woman who avoids promotion, preferring to stay in her comfortable all-female team, and calls any female managers 'bitchy' and 'bossy'?

Do you have any examples please?

It’s the woman who thinks her life is more valuable than mine because she has a husband and I am single.

When someone talks in a loud high pitched voice obviously meant to immitate a woman

Also when you are in a car and the driver says "what is this woman DOING?" and it turns out to be a man... I do the opposite because IME 9 out of 10 times it is a man driving badly. Always a bit disappointed when I see these tells in people I know.

Another was a friend's mum who asked why her new partner would want her, seeing as she already had kids from a previous relationship (he does too!). She cautioned her it wouldn't last...

I'm not a particular fan of Jimmy Carr, but I do always remember one of his jokes in the introduction to 8 Out of 10 cats, which went something along the lines of "Statistics show that 98% of serious car accidents are caused by male drivers... meaning that the other 2% are the fault of BLOODY WOMEN!!!"

I always think of my mother and her hatred for feminine dress and behaviour as an example of internalised misogyny. We should all be in unisex jumpsuits in her view. Frills, pattern, swooshy skirts are all bad.

Yes! I do see women driving slowly, granted, but not dangerously like men, who often seem to think they are in a snowplough pushing traffic along without any desire to indicate or give any gap between themselves or the car in front. Finding out that many of them speeding and weaving on motorways haven't had a ticket because they have fake plates (who knew the law hadn't figured this out when we all see it while driving?) yet I got a mandatory advanced driving session for doing 33 in a 30mph zone, has been eye opening.
The law is another obvious example of sexism, where women get longer sentences for less serious and non-violent crimes.

I see the opposite as I wasn't allowed to wear trousers and had to keep shoes scuff free. Dd has a girl in her year whose mum won't let her cut her hair or wear trainers (she is now 16 and still not allowed either)...freedom of choice is key. I feel kids need to be able to play and not be put in pristine expensive show pieces that they aren't allowed to get messy. Boys don't get this, unless it is a special event and even then boys in a mini-tux with mud on wouldn't be seen as a big deal. Girls are expected to sit politely in a corner and stay clean meaning they don't get involved or experience play in the same way. They are told repeatedly their looks are what matters.

I think it goes much farther than we would like to think, and I know it's part of my upbringing - even though my DM would describe herself as vehemently feminist.

It's unconscious, and affects our decision making and view of life fundamentally.

Very much so.

I think the people who recognise that society infleunces them even when they consciously reject it are far more aware than the people who claim they are not influenced.

The internalisation is in the things people do or think automatically without even realising it not in the conscious choices they may make.