Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Is this massively inappropriate or should I just accept that this is where I work...?

127 replies

RoadSidePicnic · 31/03/2026 09:56

This morning I have opened up my company Teams platform to a message wishing all staff a happy Trans Visibility Day. And a photo of three beer cans from a trans owned business.

There will be some sort of social tonight for people to enjoy a trans beer.

They always do this. We already have a progress flag flying in the office and one of my colleagues with a "non binary" partner (who is constantly pushing this nonsense I should add) wears his Protect the Dolls t-shirt constantly. It's tiresome.

Does anyone else have to put up with this shit at work?

Maybe I shouldn't get too specific but we are a company that serves the technology sector (tech sector is expansive, so shouldn't be too outing). We're private sector.

Oh, and the other week they posted a thing about supporting Gendered Intelligence, a sister charity to Mermaids! I looked them up, they are dodgy as fuck (and you should see the group photo of the team, my god....).

Anyone else?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Additup · 31/03/2026 17:33

GreyskySexRealistsky · 31/03/2026 10:17

What's a trans beer?

That's what I was wondering. Maybe it's a strong ale that identifies as a babycham 😂

Forecastsayssnowbutthereisnosnow · 31/03/2026 17:37

MassiveWordSalad · 31/03/2026 17:32

In a revelation that will surprise no one, it’s the male half of this couple that is the self-taught brewer and his wife does the marketing. There was me hoping there might be a smidge of beer-based feminism involved. There are female beer-brewers out there, but this ain’t one of them. But according to them, they are ‘two queer women, in an industry dominated by straight men’ 🙄

I’d be willing to bet they ascertained their dog’s pronouns by looking at his winkie, like every dog owner in history.

And leads in his bio that he is the "keg-slinger" out of the couple. Shocking. No stepping outside of any of the gender norms for this husband and wife team.

ProudAmberTurtle · 31/03/2026 17:37

Sending a lot of sympathy your way. I work at a tech company with about 1,000 employees, and have done since 2022. It was very much into this until about mid 2023, when a number of people were made redundant, and has only mentioned trans in company-wide updates maybe once since.

Am really surprised there are companies still doing this in 2026 - it doesn't seem to be fashionable anymore.

ScaryFaces · 31/03/2026 17:39

Supporterofwomensrights · 31/03/2026 10:44

IANAL but I reckon they could be breaking the law because they are creating a hostile work environment for people with protected GC beliefs. You might want to take a look at this Sex Matters doc (Don't Get Caught Out) and perhaps create an anonymous email address and send it to senior members of staff to let them know that gender affirmative workplace culture can lead to unlawful harassment and discrimination.

https://sex-matters.org/posts/other-resources/dont-get-caught-out-a-summary-of-gender-critical-belief-discrimination-employment-tribunal-judgments/

Last person to try this grift lost resoundingly: https://www.standard.co.uk/news/crime/met-metropolitan-police-jk-rowling-mps-new-scotland-yard-b1236832.html

Detective who said trans event was like being in ‘lion’s den’ loses tribunal

Melanie Newman said she wanted to challenge what was said at the event but feared being ‘labelled part of the cult’.

https://www.standard.co.uk/news/crime/met-metropolitan-police-jk-rowling-mps-new-scotland-yard-b1236832.html

ScaryFaces · 31/03/2026 17:41

RoadSidePicnic · 31/03/2026 10:12

I've been there five years and when I started I loved it.

Now, not at all. It grates so much that they're always pushing the political ideology / agenda (there are other things too).

I hate all the woke stuff. I find it performative, insincere and highly selective. And they're massive on DEI too.

I do need a new job. My work schedule does suit me though, I have a 2 year old. I don't think these hours are easy to find when you're looking for a new job outright. The company allowed me change when I came back from mat leave...

Women are overwhelmingly the largest beneficiaries of DEI policies in the workplace, as you've experienced with your employer's flexibility around your return from maternity leave, I'd doubt you'd find a company less "massive" about DEI so accommodating.

AmaryllisNightAndDay · 31/03/2026 17:43

ProfPerformativeBewildermentOBE · 31/03/2026 16:42

A positive change may be to set up / suggest some ‘communities’ to bring focus to other events. If there is budget for a trans event, there may also be budget for a neurodiversity / cultural / special day event.

My org was really hot on Pride and trans stuff (we still have some cans of beer at the back of the fridge from Queer Brewing from a past social) but in the last year they have really stepped up to highlight other topics.
We just had a big Neurodiversity Week celebration with quizzes, lots of content and posts, plus we have various internal networks for different groups (LGBT, Asian, Spanish-speaking, Parenting, Environment, Volunteering, Pets, etc)

You might find your colleagues are interested in this kind of thing. If not, I can strongly recommend giving an internal eye roll, avoiding the performative posts and hoopla as much as possible, and just getting on with doing your job day to day.

We just had a big Neurodiversity Week celebration

Actually "neurodiversity week" is questionable for many of the same reasons. It has its own bunch of grifters https://www.neurodiversityweek.com/ My employer organised one event and also shared a link to online events organised by this bunch which included a couple of seminars about how to put pressure on management, and another about how wrong it is to think of "neurodiversity" as a disability (but I bet they still expect protection under the Equality Act). Sounds familiar anyone?

plus we have various internal networks for different groups (LGBT, Asian, Spanish-speaking, Parenting, Environment, Volunteering, Pets, etc)

I don't mind a staff network as long as everyone understands that it only represents the people who want to be members of that network and not all the other people in the company who are L or G or B or T or who speak Spanish or whatever. So management don't just consult the staff "LGBT network" if they want to know what the lesbians, gay men, bisexual or transsexuals in the company think about something.

Neurodiversity Celebration Week

Neurodiversity Celebration Week aims to bring about worldwide neurodiversity acceptance, equality and inclusion in schools and workplaces.

https://www.neurodiversityweek.com

BlueOrangeRed · 31/03/2026 17:43

My workplace is similarly big on DEI stuff, but only selectively. Loads in the weekly newsletter on trans visibility, neurodiversity.

I did mention to a member of the DEI committee that I agreed diversity is important, and that I particularly thought promoting diversity of thought was vital. And that this means being comfortable that not everyone will agree with everyone else on every single issue. She didn’t seem to agree with me!

BlueOrangeRed · 31/03/2026 17:47

Yes! Lean into this and approach it enthusiatically as 'its great your doing Trans day....could we add in celebrations some other important days?' Then overload with your suggestions. Serious ones esp less glamorous ones (as above).

Agree with this - force them to include the non sexy, non performative, stuff.

I did similar once in a discussion on toilet access, and instead talked about how important it was - in the name of equality- to have nappy changes in all of the men’s toilets.

GreyskySexRealistsky · 31/03/2026 17:48

ScaryFaces · 31/03/2026 17:41

Women are overwhelmingly the largest beneficiaries of DEI policies in the workplace, as you've experienced with your employer's flexibility around your return from maternity leave, I'd doubt you'd find a company less "massive" about DEI so accommodating.

i.e.
stop moaning
be GRATEFUL
don't question what you feel is wrong
shut up

BlueOrangeRed · 31/03/2026 17:49

GreyskySexRealistsky · 31/03/2026 10:17

What's a trans beer?

Beer that insists on being served in a wine glass?

SockPlant · 31/03/2026 17:53

ScaryFaces · 31/03/2026 17:41

Women are overwhelmingly the largest beneficiaries of DEI policies in the workplace, as you've experienced with your employer's flexibility around your return from maternity leave, I'd doubt you'd find a company less "massive" about DEI so accommodating.

well certainly a lot of policy around women going back into the workplace as mothers is... the actual law. We had a big push at one place i worked to get men to take parental leave, as a result several did, and it was brilliant.

So perhaps some of these other diversity initiatives should focus on... the law?

AmaryllisNightAndDay · 31/03/2026 17:57

Yes, "neurodiversity" is the new performative replacement for disability. Much easier than providing wheelchair access.

And who the fuck "celebrates" a disability? Not the parent worrying about their adult autistic child who needs two-to-one care in a sheltered flat. Oh, but we don't employ any of those do we, and anyway neurodiversity isn't a disability is it?

Sorry. Some bits of DEI really get on my tits.

ParmaVioletTea · 31/03/2026 20:08

BlueOrangeRed · 31/03/2026 17:49

Beer that insists on being served in a wine glass?

Water that identifies as beer.

ElenOfTheWays · 31/03/2026 20:43

ainsleysanob · 31/03/2026 16:42

I thought the whole point of being trans was so that they weren’t ‘visible’ and that they just blended in? They just want to live their lives quietly in the gender that they identify with, or so we’ve been told!

While simultaneously "living loud and proud" as the most marginalised and oppressed minority ever.

Er... confused? Me? Never 😂

Pinkissmart · 31/03/2026 20:52

What’s wrong with DEI?

AmaryllisNightAndDay · 31/03/2026 21:36

Pinkissmart · 31/03/2026 20:52

What’s wrong with DEI?

In theory, nothing. Sometimes in reality, nothing wrong; DEI done well can be a good thing. But sometimes in reality, DEI can be done very badly. Sometimes in reality DEI is done by staff who don't understand discrimination or discrimination law. Sometimes in reality the company DEI representatives may buy in material from a pressure group who encourage them to try to get ahead of the law and end up favouring one protected group over another which makes things worse. And then the company find themselves on the wrong end of a discrimination case.

DEI can be an vector for spreading misinformation. Those fun quizzes and brightly coloured posters may come from unreliable biassed sources in which case they are likely to be a mix of fact and wishful thinking. And employees are told that is what they're supposed to believe at work even if it's errant nonsense or misrepresents the law.

It may be very lovely to argue that "neurodiversity" isn't really a disability; but if it isn't a disability then it isn't a protected characteristic in UK law either and no-one has to make any workplace adjustments for it. And the people who do have a genuine diagnosed disability would have a genuine complaint about why their needs are being ignored in favour of people who don't.

ahagwearsapointybonnet · 01/04/2026 00:23

AidaP · 31/03/2026 13:39

You are lacking basic understanding, gender/sex transition is not a "belief", it's a fact protected by EqA 2010, 2006 and established in GRA 2004.

But of course you conflate it with belief, which then leads you to ridiculous conclusions that do not make sense. That's not because it makes no sense, or is inconstant, but because the information you operate from is wrong.

Sorry to burst that little bubble.

No, you're completely wrong, I'm afraid. There's no law that says any sort of transition is "a fact", and nor is "transition" protected in the EqA.

The 2 relevant protected characteristics in the EqA are first, gender reassignment. This has a very specific definition (to do with undergoing/proposing to undergo a process, etc) and is not directly synonymous with "trans", "gender ID" or anything else. Moreover, the protection granted by the EqA is from being discriminated against, e.g. by being fired, refused a service or otherwise treated unfairly by employers/service providers compared to someone otherwise similar (including being the SAME sex!) but without this characteristic. It does NOT impose any requirement for people to be treated as the opposite sex in any way, including forcing others to speak about them in particular ways for example, it doesn't place any obligations/restrictions on anyone except employers/service providers, and it doesn't give any rights to opposite-sex facilities. This PC also only applies to the person who is undergoing/proposing the process.

The other PC that may apply (but may not, as it's not strictly been tested yet) is "Religion and belief", IF the belief in "gender identity"/"transition" was held to meet the criteria for being a protected belief. If so, it would similarly mean people could not be discriminated against by employers/service providers (as above) for holding that belief. As such, it would apply to anyone who believed in GI etc., not just those who actually identify as "trans" themselves. But again, it doesn't involve any requirement for other people to play along with this belief - they still have their own rights to free speech, their own beliefs etc., and anything that tries to impose or make them profess this belief if they don't hold it themselves (e.g. being required to call a man a "woman" at work, or be "educated" on trans nonsense as if it was fact) is likely to discriminate against them. Of course, it might be judged not to be a protected belief at all, in which case workplaces trying to impose it on people with "GC" (realist) beliefs would have even less of a leg to stand on!

As for the GRA, that only applies at all to the very small minority who've successfully applied for a GRC, and means that in certain limited scenarios, they are legally considered as the opposite sex. This is a "legal fiction", it doesn't make it "a fact", and indeed, the numerous restrictions as to what a GRC actually does make it quite clear that it was acknowledged that nobody actually changes sex. Again, it imposes absolutely NO requirements on individuals to pretend someone is the opposite sex, and as the Supreme Court clearly stated, it gives no right whatsoever to use opposite-sex facilities (cos again, they've NOT actually changed sex!). So that's no excuse either.

RapidOnsetGenderCritic · 01/04/2026 09:45

Closet Brewing? I'm not feeling very thirsty all of a sudden.

GingerBeverage · 01/04/2026 09:52

How is their support for menopause? Do they run awareness events on 18 Oct?

auserna · 01/04/2026 09:57

LizzieSiddal · 31/03/2026 10:18

It’s a gin that identifies as a beer.

Trans beer is beer, you bigot.

MyAmpleSheep · 01/04/2026 10:33

auserna · 01/04/2026 09:57

Trans beer is beer, you bigot.

Trans beer is beer, trans gin is gin and non alcoholic drinks are valid?

Sortingmyself · 01/04/2026 10:53

"one of my colleagues with a "non binary" partner (who is constantly pushing this nonsense I should add) wears his Protect the Dolls t-shirt constantly. It's tiresome."

I think i'd wear a T-shirt with JKR smoking a cigar and drinking champers... 😂

lcakethereforeIam · 01/04/2026 11:23

T-shirts! Amazon sell t-shirts (hopes the image appears🤞)

Is this massively inappropriate or should I just accept that this is where I work...?
BaronessBomburst · 01/04/2026 11:25

Oh come on you lot! Everyone knows that trans beer is Heineken, which identifies as being beer despite being Amsterdam canal water.

FanFckingTastic · 01/04/2026 11:29

If it makes you feel any better, you would be in minority about anywhere, because despite what mumsnet will tell you, transphobia is not popular with the uk public. So change of place of work won't suddenly let you spew it out in the open.
Enjoy your cave of hate! If you will decide to embrace love one day, you will be welcomed as it's never too late to revisit some things in your life, and let go of the bile.

What's not popular with the UK public is lies. I would predict that we will continue to see a quiet shift away from the trans rhetoric that men can be women (and can do 'womaning' much better than actual females) towards something that closer resembles reality. This is because, deep down, people know that men are men - how they dress, the hormones they take, the pronouns they use etc. still doesn't change their reality.

Holding a realist view isn't a 'cave of hate'