Woman dies by euthanasia after becoming paraplegic trying to commit suicide after gang rape

[AComplicatedWoman]

This is one of the most heartbreaking news stories I have come across.

Noelia Castillo had a difficult childhood and spent much of it in care homes. She was sexually assaulted by her ex-boyfriend of four years after she had taken sleeping pills to help her sleep, and was assaulted on another occasion by several men in a nightclub. She attempted suicide in October 2022, and it left her unable to use her legs and in a wheelchair. Noelia conducted a long legal battle with her father for the right to end her life and she died by euthanasia on Thursday.

RIP Noelia. I am so sorry that your life was destroyed by these abhorrent abusive men.

www.independent.co.uk/news/world/noelia-castillo-euthanasia-law-spain-b2946671.html

No one can blame her for wanting to take that gamble, I would feel the same, I said the same upthread and the dilemma between wanting to do it yourself and be left with worse problems

The issue is, does the state, should the state allow it.

After they removed my spinal tumour, one of my doctors told me that it often takes years for people to accept their disability. For better or worse, the old me no longer existed and I had a new life now. He encouraged me to accept it and move on as soon as I could but acknowledged that it was difficult, painful, and often took years.

I wonder if anyone told Noelia that it can take a long time to get used to a new disability and that one needs to be patient and kind to oneself in the mean time. It's difficult for most people to accept that their life has changed dramatically. I think most people go through all the stages of grief (including feeling helpless and hopeless), because, in a way, your old self has died.

Its amazing how a thread can move so quickly from thinking its ok to kill someone in a terribly distressing state to allowing the state to kill anyone who is suicidal.
I know a few men/boys who have killed themselves. I honestly don't know why most of them did it, but one most definitely killed himself because he was dumped by the love of his life.
Would anyone seriously euthanize him?
He genuinely thought life was not worth living, otherwise he wouldn't have done it. Does that mean he should die? Should the state kill him on request? Do you really think his family and friends would have joined him and held his hand while he gets a lethal injection?
How do we decide who has this right, as we cannot feel someone else's anguish? What may feel a ridiculous reason to some could be monumental for others.
If we do it for any reasons we will have to kill students who failed their exams, failed business owners, jilted lovers....the list is endless.

Where I have done that? Provide me with the post in which I tried to "shut you down" or tell you that you should post elsewhere?

I

She was 23 when the euthanasia was first agreed.

For a lot of posters on this site, barely old enough to have a front door key

I've just wasted a good ten minutes of my evening following this thread through to find that you have been one of the most vocal and dismissive contributors so far, whereas I responded to just one of your posts ( and only made one other in total) both with general points about ethics...which you then dismissed and suggested I ought to post them elsewhere.

Can you feed yourself, sit up, or feel happiness and contentment ? She couldn't. She was never going to take another step or take a drink on her own ever again. She was and always would be helpless. She had been gang raped and abused all her life and No she didn't want to accept that.

Understandable that she wanted a way out, and humane that she was given one.

She was failed by everyone through no fault of her own. It’s very difficult to overcome a childhood like that. Thank goodness the legislators came up trumps at the end of her life, and someone, finally, was on her side.

Where have you got that from

She said herself she was sick of people talking about her like they knew her and said people said she cant do things for herself but she showers, gets out of bed, wears make up and was fed up of people saying she didnt do those things.

Theres very little information about the childhood though that Ive now realised I made assumptions about what her childhood was like

We only know she went into care at 13. We know she started having psychiatric treatment (dont know what that consisted of) at 13

She left care a few years after entering and was attacked by a partner.

Later she was raped by 3 boys/men.

In the aftermath of the rape she tried to kill herself.

So when you say 'a childhood like that', what are you describing?

Rest easy, Noelia. 💐

We won’t forget you.

Oh get a grip, I have a son and I totally agree it’s ‘not all men’ but it’s enough men…

You're letting your imagination run wild. She was interviewed in the last few days and there are recent videos of her walking with a frame. Away with your nonsense!

And the 'she had been abused all her life'

She had enough abuse in her life for significant trauma, theres no doubt about that

But to say 'she had been abused all her life' is not accurate.

The more I think about this and the more I read about it, Im really concerned. This isnt right.

I think this is a really vulnerable mentally ill young woman who has had a number of traumatic events happen to her, who said like many do 'I want to die' and the state killed her.

This is not empowerment.

Is this her, I cant really see the face

https://www.instagram.com/reels/DWXOJP6DxfV/

On the more general point, it is surprisingly common for people to feel suicidal following life upsets.

one of the reasons that the Samaritans was founded was so that people who are struggling and feeling suicidal for a whole variety of reasons can have someone to talk to and who listens to them.

for many people that small change is enough to help them move past what can be a temporary difficulty.

i note that the Spanish system required two applications fifteen days apart and that in order to apply you needed to be in severe and intractable pain.

so it’s got timing safeguards built into it and you can’t even apply if it is “just” depression.

I can sit up. I wasn't comparing our disabilities. I wouldn't do that even if we had the same ones because even the same disability is experienced differently by different people. Part of that is one's body and personality but a lot of it is one's environment and the support one gets.

How do you know she'll never feel happiness or contentment? That seems extreme to me. I have CPTSD from being trafficked and physically abused as a child. I 've also been gang raped. Because of my abuse history and CPTSD, I've known many people who have been raped hundreds of times, usually as children. I've also known people with clinical depression, bipolar, and personality disorders (which are fairly common among people who were severely abused as children)., All of them sometimes felt happiness or contentment. That doesn't mean they were always happy. All of them had, at some points (often many points) wanted to die. But they also sometimes felt happy or content.

For almost everyone, their life improved when they were no longer in an abusive environment. It improved more and more quickly if they had good support.

Noelia's life would be burdensome. That doesn't mean that if she'd lived she'd never feel happiness or contentment. IMO it would be difficult to adjust to her disabilities but everyone I know who has a disability does eventually accept their disability and adjust to it.

I hope someone told it that it was normal to take years to adjust and that it was normal to feel helpless and hopeless.

You seem very angry, and though it is reasonable to be angry about the appalling behaviour of some men, there's no need to have a go at women who think its important to remember that not all men behave like that.

To be honest I dont consider 15 days much of a timing safeguard.

I was referring to a childhood that has negligent primary caregivers and frequent disruptions.

Wheres the information about her life pre 13?

I can only find information about her coming into care at 13, not exactly why, although the word neglect is used. I cant find information about her life pre 13.

What are the frequent disruptions?

oh it’s just so tedious the ‘not all men’ often trotted out by the ‘all lives matter’ crowd or men’s rights activists.

pandering to patriarchy doesn’t really get us anywhere, although it is very Erica Kirk of you

All lives do matter, including men's lives, but if you mean I would say that in response to 'Black lives matter', I certainly would not.
I don't know who Erica Kirk is.

You're right about the old self dying and having to find a new way. Years ago, I knew someone who had suffered a serious spinal injury and had to use a wheelchair. I know he found the first few years after his accident very, very difficult, but he ended up making a very good life for himself.

Noelia, though, had so much more to come to terms with: a disastrous upbringing, rape, and being in intractable pain. I don't often use the word tragic, but her life truly was.

It's tragic she tried to kill herself and in not succeeding put herself in an unbearable physical state, it's tragic her family didn't care for her and men assaulted her. But at the particular point in time she died, she was an adult with full capacity and decided she had passed the point of no return.

Some of the commentators on here, though, would rather she keep going through the unbearable because it 'doesn't sit right' with them. I assume, since it's not mentioned, that said commentators aren't also paraplegic, incontinent and in permanent physical pain, with no future prospects of life outside a bed in a care home.

How long should the authorities keep a 25-year-old, who has asked to die, in that position to see whether she's going to come to terms with it I wonder? I mean, how long to satisfy those who think, from their point of view, that she should come to terms with it because they feel bad about it?