Minor “challenge” about wellbeing events

[Deanefan]

So I’m getting bolder in my NHS Wales mega captured organisation. Still have my for women scotland XX pin on my lanyard and have replied honestly when I have been asked about it.

This week I emailed the organising group, to ask why the “men’s health” drop in discussion session was men only but the “menopause cafe” was an inclusive event. I pointed out it was likely some women would prefer a discussion in a single sex space.

Ooh, well done! Is there an erectile disfunction cafe? If so, partners and allies should be invited to offer their perspectives and give support 😉

I can imagine some very hushed conversations about how to placate you. Keep going asking those awkward questions

Interesting to see if anything gets disclosed in response to my FOI request. I did toy with the idea of suggesting they run a one off “pop up erectile dysfunction cafe!” just to gauge enthusiasm for the concept amongst the male staff 🤔😂

I read this, then laughed, just after taking a huge mouthful of greek yoghurt. The mess! 😂

I don't think I had seen this thread originally OP, but well done for plugging away at it. I think questions are a good way to go, as this thing is so inherently illogical that illogicality gets shown up really easily, so ask away!

I really notice now when men are allowed to be men, no inclusvity needed.

I sooo miss the laughter emoji. The app only does thanks so please take my thanks as 😂😂😂

🤣🤣🤣

They did similar in my NHS Board - menopause events were open to all and various speakers came to discuss all aspects of menopause which included vaginal dryness and hand out some samples of creams etc while a male colleague sat listening in. I get that it's important for men to understand and support this stage of a woman's life, but the chances of me ever going back knowing Big Dave from Accounts is sat next to me is nil.

Exactly why I want to know if there was any discussion about whether women would prefer a single sex space. There is a separate event dedicated to explaining menopause to line managers etc

So had a response to my FOI request today….

They are still in the process of finalising the response to my request 🙄 I asked specific questions and only three so not sure how much retrieving there needs to be. So the wait goes on

They're clearly having trouble writing out their explanation in a way that doesn't show it up as total nonsense.

My old NHS place planned open-to-all menopause cafes, but were surprising amenable to the idea that some women might prefer women only for privacy.

Or at least weren't keen to argue the point. They may have had in the back of their minds my previous argument with HR, during which I spent several months quoting increasingly obscure passages of tax law at them and asking them to justify their interpretations of it.

That’s 🤣🤣🤣 twice today! Love your comparison of treatment approach- very effective and more difficult to defend. Thanks for this.

Sorry, that was meant as reply to you and Deanefan

So I have now had the proper response to my FOI. In all the years worth of menopause cafes they had data for only 5 men attended - so much for support from the brotherhood. Or perhaps the men felt the women deserved a bit of space. A scoping exercise was conducted in Feb 26, several months after I raised the issue that there was not a women’s health group. This reveals that in informal contacts all the women said they would prefer a general health group to the menopause cafe. The exercise recommends that a women’s health group be arranged.

However I have noticed that nowhere in the document does it say SINGLE SEX womens health group. So I will be clarifying that with wellbeing next week. Overall glad I sent that first enquiry and that I have stuck with it. Embrace your DGAF era ladies 👍😂

Fabulous! What a result and I’m glad you are keeping an eye on it!

Well done. 🙂

So attended a meeting with a supportive colleague and three women from OH/well-being departments this week. Another woman from Equality and Widening Access to host the meeting.

40 minutes of increasing frustration. One of them visibly winced the first time I said single-sex! The plan for the forthcoming engagement sessions on the women’s health group was to only ask open questions “to encourage conversation and debate” They was a very strong resistance to including the question “would you prefer the women’s health group to be single sex”

They did not like the fact I pointed out that the average attendance across the menopause cafes has been less than 5. I said is it because timings/venues are not good, because women don’t want a discussion with men present or something else? No answer because they have never asked that question.

To the astonishment of both of us they have agreed to ask the closed question at the engagement events. Having the FOI request information was so important to achieve this I think.

But what a lot of time and effort to get to this point. There seem to be four layers of people in each department. A bit like all the HR layers in Fife!!

How many women would be eligible if they all turned up? I’m wondering about 5 as a percentage of the market, so to speak.
I’d expect a good chunk of women aged over, say 40, to go. Not because it’s irrelevant to younger women, but because it wouldn’t be their priority area.

I had asked for the breakdown of attendees by age and sex but they don’t record age 🤷‍♀️ Overwhelming women - so either men dont feel the need to be supportive or they recognise the value of a single sex space for their female colleagues

I mean, it would be sensible to offer targeted sessions.
Alternate sessions could be ‘supporters’ sessions, for example, leaving half the sessions available for more personal conversations.

There are issues I’d happily raise among a group of women gathered to consider menopause, that I simply would not broach if men were present. Or even significantly younger women bosses!

Educational sessions could alternate with peer support sessions, allies welcome to the first but not the second.

How many sessions are needed?!

Well done!

Well that could be useful I agree. But as we have a single sex men’s health group I have been asking them to justify why we don’t have a general group rather than a narrow focus on just one issue. Lots of conditions are commoner in women than men after all.