Girls Using Walking Sticks

[Arran2024]

I saw a post about this on X this morning. Apparently it is a trend.

Anyway, I went into town this afternoon and sure enough, I saw a number of young women with walking sticks. None of them looked like they were leaning hard on their stick, just kind of walking along like it was a big umbrella.

Is anyone else seeing this?

"Many people use that benefit to get a new car"
Well, it makes a change to the usual "bloomin' benefit people and their flat screen TVs" 🙄
I'd have thought buying a car would be sensible, actually - what if it gave a bit more freedom, independence? Oh, and you have no way of knowing "but they all let their mum/dad/sister/next door neighbour drive it!" Even if they did - surely it's still benefiting the person in need?!

No what I take from that website is the language of Inclusion that is used by identity groupings more generally; and that was the point of this thread......and why you are at such loggerheads with the general direction of the thread. Becaue one of the main topics of interest on this forum is 'identity politics' and its many manifestations; primarily 'trans ideology/gender Identity theory, but also other adjacent identities, one of which now appears to be having a disability identity.

Why shouldn't people have a "disability identity" though if they choose?! Would you feel more comfortable if they hid away, weren't as visible or vocal about it?

Many of us personally know people who benefit from new cars, all expenses paid ( and who are not in employment) and how the system is abused in this way. The British car industry is apparently heavily dependent on people who receive PIP payments. In my city there is a whole car showroom for motability cars. You see hundreds of them on the roads.

People can choose to identify with anything they like and they clearly do....but I'm personally more interested in looking at the social phenomenon that surrounds those identifications. More interested in analysis and reflection of social trends.

I wouldn’t call this a ‘campaign’ but ‘awareness’. These conditions do limit energy. People with them need to learn to portion out their energy throughout the day carefully according to their needs (and sometimes are taught specific methods to do so).

Re identity, I was interested in the article linked upthread that the numbers of ADHD diagnoses are pretty stable when it comes to severe cases - the skyrocketing numbers are in the mild diagnostic range, or maybe better to say diagnoses are given for some evidence of ADHD traits. And maybe we've gone from underdiagnosis to overdiagnosis, or to medicalising for traits that don't add up to a whole condition.

That's why, with some conditions anyway, I'm interested in whether there's a formal diagnosis. Everyone I know who's diagnosed with autism says that autism sucks and they wish they didn't have it. But I also encounter lots of people who identify as being mildly "on the spectrum", mildly OCD or whatever.

The cynic in me can't help but notice that these are "smart" coded conditions and remember that old Joan Rivers gag about who, when celebrities confess to eating disorders, it's always the thin ones. I've never heard of an online influencer "identifying as" paranoid schizophrenic.

If it matters, my autoimmune condition, when it flares up, can have some unattractive visible symptoms. I suspect not many 18yo girls are talking themselves into believing they have it.

Exactly, and we also have to learn to advocate why we can do X but can't do Y

Or can do X today but genuinely couldn't do it yesterday

And I find it helpful to have organisations and individuals who do that campaigning

But I have realised that this thread has quite an unpleasant edge. It's not at all just about people who they perceive aren't disabled and use a stick, it's also minimising all manner of health conditions and implying they aren't disabling and that if people just had more will power they would be fine.

So I am bowing out because I think what these people want is a little nasty echo chamber

It would be so different if you had written "i would have thought... but i see now its not the case". But you didnt. You said this reinforced your views.

Dont try and use technicalities in language to convince yourself you are actually a respectful person. Because you are not and your completely OTT response to me further proves this.

This
Plus the usual " you're angry" accusation if it's an opinion that's not the "approved" one.
Always have to paint an alternative view as being angry.

It means that we both went through menopause without claiming it is as a disability.

I was diagnosed POTS, MCAS, EDS when I was 32, but my symptoms started when I was 9, it was just never diagnosed. I also have arthritis, ADHD, and a ton of other abbreviations that are all diagnosed prior to the correct diagnosis of POTS, EDS and MCAS which actually explain everything else.

I’ve used crutches/sticks/wheelchairs/splints when necessary since the age of 14.

Why do people have to assume these things aren’t genuine?

It’s all medically diagnosed, I have constant dislocations, beta-blockers, a blue badge and claim PIP as a result of a genuine need and yet people think it’s ok to judge and assume we’re following a trend!

In response to people also saying the same people often have things like dyed hair- again yes I do but I’m now mid 40’s and have done this since I was 14! I’m shocked how judgemental people are- I’ve never experienced it from people my own age and younger and this thread makes me sad.

I see my post with link to an online community for chronic illness was deleted. It's starting to feel very familiar......which is the whole point of the discussion, isn't it. How adjacent some of these identities seem to be.

chronicillnessinclusion.org.uk

Yes! I'm usually so polite - even on mumsnet - but i am sick (pun intended) of being expected to put up with downright ableism with a smile on my face.

Many people need to modulate their activity throughout the day - in response to various conditions, ailments and so on. It is perfectly normal. We all have our own patterns and physical responses, limits etc.

You do realise we're not all the same, right?!
We don't all experience it the same!
You sailed through enough it to not be too badly affected by it
Yay, go you. Do you want a medal?! 🙄 For doing it so much better than others.

Can I ask, out of genuine interest , do you think there's a connection between the disability and a preference to bright dyed hair that people are missing here?
Maybe (and I am hypothesising) disabled people might dye their hair to cheer themselves up, or add interest to a life that is quite limited, or perhaps because they end up making connections with other disabled people and that becomes part of their community? Or perhaps because when it's hard due to health to hold down a conventional job it frees you up to look more alternative? I think a mix of all of these perhaps apply to my cousin.

Anyway, I love seeing people with bright coloured hair and clothes and sticks. It cheers up a sometimes grey and gloomy world.

I fill my house with flowers and pictures s because I spend a lot of time here .

I haven't even dyed my hair a natural colour yet, never mind a bright one. But I am tempted too just to annoy the bigots

There's a difference between normal modulations and having to change your activity level in a way that substantially curtails your life.

It's weird and grotesque to minimalise what that can be like

Can I ask, out of genuine interest , do you think there's a connection between the disability and a preference to bright dyed hair that people are missing here?
Maybe (and I am hypothesising) disabled people might dye their hair to cheer themselves up, or add interest to a life that is quite limited, or perhaps because they end up making connections with other disabled people and that becomes part of their community? Or perhaps because when it's hard due to health to hold down a conventional job it frees you up to look more alternative? I think a mix of all of these perhaps apply to my cousin
Anyway, I love seeing people with bright coloured hair and clothes and sticks. It cheers up a sometimes grey and gloomy world.
I fill my house with flowers and pictures s because I spend a lot of time here
I haven't even dyed my hair a natural colour yet, never mind a bright one. But I am tempted too just to annoy

Great post and yes I love seeing brightly coloured hair and can see the adding interest angle.
Why not?! Anything that brightens up a day is fine by me

Why are you assuming they are adjacent? I am gender critical. I just think it is unacceptable to mock and minimise conditions that can be profoundly disabling.

@Shortshriftandlethal Nothing in the OP, which I didn’t seek out on the Feminism, Sex and Gender board, but clicked on in ‘Trending’ without realising that’s where it was, suggests it has anything to do with trans ideology or gender issues.

”Arran2024 · 08/07/2025 18:57
I saw a post about this on X this morning. Apparently it is a trend.
Anyway, I went into town this afternoon and sure enough, I saw a number of young women with walking sticks. None of them looked like they were leaning hard on their stick, just kind of walking along like it was a big umbrella.
Is anyone else seeing this?”

If anything it suggests suspicion of disability as a chosen identity and asks if this is a thing.

I don’t give a damn how much ownership you feel you have over this ‘cohesive’ section of MN, I will post when I see blatant ableism being dressed up as something else.

It’s not a discussion if you are talking inside your own echo chamber. The opinions and experience of actual disabled individuals, particularly those with a slightly alternative image and who loosely fit the description given in the OP are obviously relevant to the discussion. If indeed you actually do want a discussion at all.

Thank you for your typically ableist insult, but I am not ‘hard of thinking’. I am a fairly sensible, pretty normal, post menopausal woman with three very different dc, two with disabilities, one of which is also LGBT. I have also lived with lifelong disability myself - diagnosed late thanks to endemic misogyny within the medical professions - and have been through a rough time with the menopause. I don’t and have never claimed any benefits, nor have any of my dc. There is so much more to us than our disabilities. Disability is part of, but not all of our identities. If, however, we felt so overwhelmed by disability that it did become our overall identity or we felt safer and more supported with other people who are in the same position, so limited ourselves to their company and as tends to be the way, adopted similar fashion trends etc, no-one has the right to judge that.

I did not post to turn the thread into a ‘support group for chronically ill people’. Quite apart from anything else, the last place I would go for support is MN, let alone this board. I posted because the OP appeared to ask a question which I was interested in and have some experience of and others suggested the very real, diagnosed, genetic conditions my family suffer from are not real, but some sort of alternative lifestyle choice, favoured by grifters who are out to scam a free ride out of the tax payer. My family’s experience of presenting the way the OP mentioned is very relevant to the conversation, but I realise that isn’t actually what this thread is about, so I’m not going to waste any more of my time on it.

It’s not normal to have a condition or ailment, no. And if someone does have a diagnosed condition or ailment which limits them again that’s not normal.

some people without a diagnosed condition I guess may struggle with physical activity but that would either be due to age in which case they’ve had their time being fitter and more active and slowing down with age is normal. Or they’re unfit and can do something to improve that gradually. An option that someone who is disabled by a diagnosed condition does not have.

theres a massive difference.

i do get it’s hard for someone who isn’t affected to understand. Even dh will struggle to understand and make quips about me being lazy. It’s really annoying.

You’re starting to sound a bit silly now.

@SilverSnaffles totally agree. This is not a trans board and nothing in the OP mentioned trans at all. So no idea why some people are claiming this thread is about trans people and sticks……it isn’t. It’s about women and sticks.

My children and DH are amazing, but although to the untrained eye my condition is invisible, they can now see the ptosis worsen and of course they hear my speech get slurred or see me choke on my food or drink or saliva when I do too much. So weirdly although i call it an invisible condition it's visible to my family and neurologist

It's horrible having people imply you are lazy when in fact my experience is that you are probably the opposite and put on a brave face and cope with a lot