Would you say something regarding toilet/ changing room use?

[Benefitbettyquestion]

I'm just wondering if most people would say something if they were somewhere and a transgender individual used the womens toilets.
And would you say something to the person or to the staff member? Or maybe contact them after the fact.

Depends whether the transgender individual is male or female. If male I would complain to staff and would say something to the individual if it was safe to do so.

I’d be too scared to say anything directly be honest.

I'd be scared to raise it, and would just stop using the service.

Doubt I’d challenge a bloke directly. If he was in changing rooms I’d definitely contact management

If there was a cross-dressing man in the women’s, I would complain to staff. I know now, from the Supreme Court ruling, that the company or organisation now has a responsibility to provide me with single-sex spaces if the area is marked to indicate it’s for women.

I’m unlikely to challenge him myself.

Every single trans woman in the UK knows they were born male and every single one knows that there is controversy over them using women's toilets because many women expressing discomfort or fear.
They'll all almost certainly be aware of the supreme court judgement.
So any male person I encounter in a women's space is there knowing that the court has ruled it inappropriate and knowing that he is likely to cause fear or upset.
And he's done it anyway. At the most gracious interpretation of his motivation (just want to pee), he'll have decided that he doesn't mind making women uncomfortable if it gets him his desires.
That's not someone I would confront. He's already shown he doesn't respect boundaries.
Depending on the situation, I might raise with management or security, same as any man entering women's spaces.

On the assumption that you mean a bloke in a girls’/women’s toilet - then yes I would call them out.

I have done so, and will continue to do so.

No I wouldn’t challenge a man in the women’s directly. Im considerably smaller and weaker than men and just the fact that he’s chosen to knowingly invade a woman’s space after all the coverage means that he’s not someone I want to go front. It’s d complain to staff

if I saw an obvious trans man going into the men’s loos I’d worry about them but wouldn’t say anything

Yes to clarify I mean a transgender woman i.e. biological man, using the women's toilets.

It would depend on the circumstances - where it was, who else was around.

@CollaterlieSistersSister what have you said when this situation has arisen?

Exactly this.

This for me too.

I think the difficulty is that sometimes you just freeze.

Not directly trans-related but yesterday my colleague (MC) went to use the ladies* and encountered a girl of maybe 4/5 waiting outside the cubicles. MC was about to ask if she was OK when the girl said something in a non=English language and a male voice replied from inside the cubicle and a man then emerged. I asked MC if she'd said anything but she'd been so taken aback that she just froze until the father and daughter left the toilets.

Personally I would not have hesitated to say "You can't be in here, please take your daughter to the gender-neutral toilet next door" but MC is not as familiar with the issue as I am.

*Toilets are currently being turned into "Unisex, gender neutral, fully-enclosed" type but they haven't started on the female ones yet. The current accessible, gender neutral toilet (with the big triple cross/arrow symbol) is right next to the female toilets, father had to pass it to get to the female toilets.

Edited to add: Being generous, the male toilets are currently out of action as they're being changed to fully enclosed so it's possible that the father just used the nearest. That's the most generous interpretation because, as I say, he could have used the existing GN toilet or, if he'd asked, we could have directed him to the nearest male toilets, less than 50 yards away.

I voted based on your updates post to confirm what you meant.

However, I would speak to the man AND I'd tell staff.

Unless I felt the situation was too volatile and it was safer for myself and other women to bypass the man and go straight to staff.

Having seen clarification that we are talking about a male in the Ladies (which is what I assumed the Q was about):

My default would be to leave and to tell staff.

There are some circumstances in which I would confront the individual, eg. if it was someone who I knew, who I expected would be amenable to reason and I did not anticipate that I was putting myself in any danger.

Maybe also I can imagine some circumstances in which I might say something like, "This is the Ladies." and if they made no move to leave that I might say something like, "This is the Ladies. If you don't leave I am going to have to report you."

I would feel safer saying something if there were other women waiting too but my default would be to tell management/staff/security and leave it to them to sort it out.

A man now intentionally breaking this boundary and seeking access to women for his own reasons is not likely to be a safe person to challenge. I'd leave and speak to staff. In most places now there are policies about how people may treat staff and that those kicking off and being unpleasant will be asked to leave the service or the police may be called.

And yes, be clear with staff that if they are not prepared to do something about it - with the greatest sympathy to the situation this man has chosen to place them in - then I will be looking for further action re sex discrimination, and reporting to the EHRC.

I would feel scared and intimidated, and get the fuck out of there as fast as possible. Men who deliberately breach women's boundaries tend not to be very safe to challenge.

What @IllustratedDictionaryOfTheDoldrums said.

I'm not challenging anyone who's made it plain that they have no regard for the law, women or their rights.
They'd be absolutely spoiling for a fight if I did.

Unfortunately it also plays into the 'I'm never challenged, therefore everyone is so supportive' narrative.

Same, I would high tail it out of there. But while I was there my mind would run through what I would bite or gouge if I was attacked, what I have in my hand bag to stab them, how loud do I have to scream to get attention.
Based purely on past experience.

I would not challenge them and I’d recommend to all women they don’t challenge them, it’s too risky. I’d leave and either find a member of staff or complain in writing.

I've ticked "Something else". I'm not sure what I mean by that. If they looked embarrassed, I would probably let them get on with their business. If they looked unrepentant, I might stare rudely or give them a one-finger salute. If they looked dangerous, I would ... let them get on with their business.

I have been in this situation and was a bit surprised, but I pretended not to notice them. I wouldn't challenge trans women in the ladies toilets, because I believe that many of them are nice, gentle, somewhat vulnerable people who are trying to manage their gender dysphoria. And as for the (presumably rare) male who seems to get a kick out of intruding on women's spaces or intimidating women? Well, I don't think it would be safe to confront them, especially if I found myself alone with one of them behind those sound-proofed double doors...

However, if a male ever behaved inappropriately towards me in women's toilets or changing rooms, I would report it afterwards. But this has never happened to me so far.

I think everyone who says these men are dangerous is correct, but sometimes I just can’t stop myself shouting/swearing etc as I am so sick of it all. Usually it is just random men who just happen to invade my space that get my fury, so I probably would not shut my mouth,,,

I do agree that the 'I'm never challenged, therefore everyone is so supportive' narrative is flawed.

I've seen a few trans women comment on social media that no one has clocked them for ages and, well, either I'm particularly perceptive, or people are being very polite. There are trans women who pass remarkably well in real life, but I know of many who do not, even if they pass in photos.