What questions should people be asking themselves?

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If you were trying to encourage someone who has been taken in by trans ideology to critically think about the whole gender thing…what questions would you suggest they ask themselves?
I’ll start with “At what point during transition does a man become a woman?”

I'd ask Do you think the Darlington nurses have the right to get changed away from a man?

Why do you really think a person can become or just "be" the opposite sex - whether by taking pills/having surgery or by simply saying so? How does that work?

And: would you still think that if there wasn't a moral element where you feel like it's what you should think and you're a bigot if you don't?

Am I a man ?

Do people born with a female reproductive system face (historically or currently) any forms of oppression or marginalisation that are unique to them or that impact them disproportionately?

If so, don't we need a word that describes this group, which includes all of them, but only them, so that we know who and what we're talking about when we discuss the experiences of this group?

Why shouldn't this group be included in the protections of the Equality Act?

Do you really believe a woman can have a penis?

If "woman" had been redefined just over a century ago to mean "any person of either sex who wishes to live according to the societal customs and expectations attached to womanhood", would the suffragette movement have even happened? Should those women - who did not wish to live within cultural expectations such as "women aren't rational so can't have the vote", have determined that they were not, in fact, women after all, rather than determining that the cultural expectations needed to change?

What is the future of feminism if we redefine the word 'woman' to mean that the stereotypes and cultural expectations are real and true, and biology is irrelevant?

Does being a woman mean having a female body and any personality? Or a 'female' personality and any body? What is progressive about labelling personalities as 'genders'?

This is a great one

Surely they would just say, they'd always been a woman inside or something. So from birth. ( gendered souls and all that)

I tried variations of many of these on someone I talked to at work this week. None of them worked. It was actually a great conversation i.e. a logical, rational one where we both behaved as adults, but fundamentally the 'most marginalised, persecuted community' angle is still working, as is the 'if they make all the effort and look like women, why shouldn't they go into single sex spaces'.
I think the other thing is all the inconsistencies gender raises isn't known or really thought about by most people, all they see is the emotion and feelings from the trans community. Feelings trump facts every time. Especially mens feelings 🙄

They might do, but then I’d ask them to explain how that actually works, given that gender is a social construct and all that.

Do you understand the principles behind safeguarding? Is it a good thing?

I would start with (if talking to a man)

“Tell me what makes you a man?”

If they waffle on about physical appearance, clothes, hobbies, “male” emotions etc I would then ask

”So if I were to wear trousers, trainers, hoodies and take up football and not talk about my feelings etc etc does that make me a man?”

And let the whole illogicality play out

We had a male member of the HR team at work tell me that a woman could have a beard and penis.
I so wish that I had had the courage to turn around a D gush about how wonderful it was for him to accept that a gay man could have a vagina.

Sadly I think people have an automatic sympathy for TW that they don't have for women. So I'd use that.

Start by asking if TW have the right to a female-only space, or be housed with female prisoners, or strip searched by a female. Presumably the answer will be yes. Explore this gently a bit - it's so the TW is safe, feels ok etc.

Then ask if the TW has a right to object if a man enters the female-only space, or is put in a cell with a man, or searched by a man. Why does this matter? Is it the TW's safety and feelings that matter?

Point out that when we think about TW we think from their point of view - they are looking at a man and feeling afraid and uncomfortable. Can we do that for women for a minute, think from their point of view? When they look at the TW and feel afraid and uncomfortable, does that matter? If not why not?

You might ask why the need for "No Debate", for all the " bigot" language, why the fear of giving any empathy to females in sport. Is this the normal behaviour of people who genuinely believe in what they're saying? Or is it more likely the fear that what they want to believe they really don't?

But in the end, people are allowed to disagree! If you have a polite conversation without name calling that's a success in itself.

"Do you think there are any differences between a man and a woman, or are they both words used to describe adults of any biological sex? "

If they do think there is a difference, can they give an example of one? One thing that would differentiate a man from a woman - how would you know if you were questioning your gender which characteristics align with man /woman?

I wouldn't go into specific court cases or toilets or specific situations straight away - i think it is incredibly important to be clear about what they actually mean by man/woman.

I have asked a fully TWAW female family member this: did she genuinely feel that if a man had climbed the corporate ladder and was in a senior role, and then transitioned, that this meant a woman had succeeded in making it to the top?

And gently suggested that perhaps he might not have had the same "lived experience" of a woman trying to progress in the corporate world.

I know my family member was not convinced, but I do know she had a sleepless night and maybe it's a small part of the jigsaw that will all come together eventually.

if they make all the effort and look like women, why shouldn't they go into single sex spaces'

Surely anyone saying this is admitting that they themselves use 'women' to mean females?

Otherwise they're saying they make an effort to look like an adult of either sex, which makes no sense. All adults look
like women if a woman is a male or female person. All adults also look like men if a man is a male or female person.

I suppose 'I support the Linda Norgrove Foundation. I feel OK that their scheme to bring a small number of female medical students over from Afghanistan to complete their studies in Scotland could be limited to women only, and that if they choose, they could be in female-only accommodation. Do you think those women should have access to something like that, or do you think it shouldn't be possible to exclude male people from the scheme?'

I suppose the follow up would then be:

“if being a woman is just down to an internal feeling, what is the need for surgery and cross-sex hormones?”

I go for an incredulous -
'TWAW?? You don't really believe that a man can become a woman or vice versa, do you - I mean, come on!'

This has a good strike rate because deep down, very few people actually believe that you can change sex. Even the most #bekind people tend to start talking about souls and feeling comfortable and empathy then quickly move on to phobias and bigotry.

I project the idea that it is so bloody obvious that transwomen are not women and never can be, that the sensible intelligent person I'm talking to can't possibly seriously believe TW really AW..

It was quite successful with canvassers and candidates who called during the last general election campaign here in Ireland. In fact, several canvassers seemed a bit taken aback that the party they were campaigning for actually claims that TWAW, and didn't even try to justify it!

I start on the difference between sex and gender. sex is the physical body you are born with. Gender is the social roles and stereotypes. As a mother who is also a scientist, always wears trousers, no make up, I’m pretty clear on the difference between sex and gender.

i also find it always helps to asking questions - let a person try to explain their reasoning and they will see what fails. It over takes several conversations to change someone’s mind and it helps to start with small things.

I had someone tell me that TW were not men, they were women.

So I asked if I could be a TW? And they replied, 'No, because you're a wo..... ah, you're trying to trick me!'

EVERYONE knows that TWAM, including the TW themselves.

To counter the 'My TW friends are lovely' which seems to crop up often enough, I have said I don't doubt that they are. I do think that people hear TWAM and think of how hurt their lovely friend would be etc, but forget that allowing their lovely friend access to women only spaces means letting in all men, Including the one who has made them feel uncomfortable, who they really wouldn't want to share a private space with.