How many terfs are out there?

[Runor]

I spent years in the wilderness, not talking about my terfiness irl, because friends had been politely distancing themselves from my views. Things are changing. I now know about a dozen people who have previously quietly asked me to ‘be kind to men who think they are women’ (I paraphrase), who are now strongly espousing TWANW.

What can we do? Recommend books and podcasts. Ask what people think about men in women’s sport, men in women’s changing rooms and hospital wards. Ask them if the like JKR 😉 Anything else?

We need to find each other irl. We all need to see that we are a huge majority that has been silenced for too long. Not everybody can, not everywhere is safe, but maybe now is the time to test the water?

I'm always surprised to find out someone in NOT a TERF. It's the only position that actually makes sense and doesn't involve experimenting on minors. Ime, most people who think they aren't Terfs, actually are when you ask them the right questions. For example I have a TWAW friend who thinks that TW should not be in female changing rooms and another who allows her daughter to have sleepovers with her transidentified female friend but not her actual male friends - this despite the fact that she claims to regard friend as 100% male. I beg to differ. Both closet terfs.

I am a lonely middle-aged terf . Most men I know do not see a problem with men pretending to be women and I am very resentful of this, because they cannot see how misogynistic the whole movement is.

Me!! Liberal lefty 44 year old

Most men don't like men who deviate to far from behaving like men!

I personally don't like the terf label. I think it pigeonholes the debate too much and makes it too much us and them whereas it's far more complex. I think the important thing is to keep discussions going. Also there is no way I agree 100% with what someone says. You can agree with some points and disagree with other that's just normal life 🤷‍♀️

anyone who says, with a straight face "trans women are women" might as well have said "I'm completely fucking mental, me". The only people that truly believe that used to be put in funny farms (when we still had them)-apart from them, I think everyone is a terf.

I'm a terf and so are all my family and most of my friends. I lost a couple of friends who think I'm a bigot, but it's no loss really. I'd rather be friends with people who believe in biological facts and who think women's safety is more important than a few mentally ill men's feelings.

For me, it's like the Sal Grover quote 'if you say women have a penis, I won't believe a word you say about anything else. If you will lie about something so fundamental, you can't be trusted' (from memory so might not be spot on).

Anyone espousing TWAW might as well be insisting that the moon is made of cheese, that the tooth fairy exists or the world is flat. My opinion of them is that they are credulous and easily befuddled.

I didn't choose the terf label. I didn't realise I was one until I got told I was, for suggesting third spaces as a way of solving the women's spaces argument. Got told to educate myself. So I did.
Here I am.

I'm here!

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Every single person I speak to - and I speak to a lot of people - agrees that you cannot change sex and that male predators will abuse women if they allow self ID. But most will not say anything as they are scared.

I'm open about my views and haven't yet met anyone keen to disagree with me. I've been a TERF for many, many years now.

I did have a chat with some guys who put on a music festival. They frankly thought I was imagining rapists in women's prisons and men in women's sports. So I took out my phone... They were gobsmacked and horrified. So even supposed 'alternative' men are dreadfully ignorant.

👋

🙋🏻‍♀️

Yes, I am a TERF. Unfortunately I am surrounded by buffoons. It is very sad that I don't feel that I am able to discuss something as important as women's safety, for fear of being branded transphobic and made to feel that I am a horrible person.

They're terfs too. I guarantee they know who the women are. Whose rights are they trampling on in defence of whose self image? Which people do they think are obliged to undress before, or surrender opportunities to, which other group of people? Do they even use the word terf for a GC man?

They know. They think they're evolved and superior because they pretend not to know. But they know. And one way or another, they'll demonstrate that they know.

"Alternative" men are frequently the worst. They often think being "alternative" is itself something that automatically confers superiority, like people who work high up in charities often think they can do no wrong because they're high up in a charity. It's absolutely amazing how many men who consider themselves alternative, evolved, superior, progressive and so on are so completely blinded when it comes to women and treat them just the same as any other garden variety sexist. A man whose concern in women's rights begins and ends with women having casual sex and doing sex work isn't a feminist.

Twice in the last few years old friends have asked subtle questions to ascertain where I am on this and we are all relieved !

Dh genuinely didn’t believe that anyone could actually believe you could change sex. Also as a man his default is to be deeply suspicious of other men’s motives. His default is to take women’s side unless proved otherwise.

I'm here!

I'm here! And my DH and family, plus my cousin, neighbour and some friends.

I've been a terf for a good few years now and have had some friends drop contact because of it, but honestly if they really do believe the twaw stuff then I can't trust them anyway, so they're no loss.

Hear hear to all these amazing comments.

I don't see many people but live rurally where people call a spade a spade and know the difference between a Mabel and a George. I used to work in a local cafe and met loads of people. Every single one of my friends and family are terfs. I met loads of people in the cafe who brought up the tra nonsense unprovoked, usually around the toilet access issue (there was one for each sex in this cafe). It very much brought me down out of the tree on this. I am now firmly of the opinion the be-kinders are exclusively in woke cities and the woke professions (basically any gen z straight out of uni). Unfortunately the teachers are totally captured. Something must be done about this.

I didn't choose the terf life either, the terf life chose me 😉.

The good lord saw fit to curse me with an allergy to vacuous, incoherent bullshit so here I am, fighting for my life day in, day out...!