Girls play outside less than boys even at two years old

[WarriorN]

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2024/oct/18/girls-play-outside-less-than-boys-even-at-two-years-old-uk-survey-reveals?CMP=ShareiOSAppp_Other

I find this really sad.

Could it be linked to internalised parental sexism attitudes?

I do remember going to toddler singing groups with my two and being quite surprised it was mostly girls.

And I also remember one day where most of the girls were very scared of Dinosaurs, which happened to be the theme. (I bloody loved dinosaurs from an early age.)

My granddaughter's school recently held a one day event to take the children out on the roads and the neighbourhood on their bikes. The class are 9/10 years old. I was surprised at how many couldn't ride a bike, or who could not ride one well. Many had to to go out and buy a bicycle in order to take part at all.

My granddaughter was riding a bicycle without stabilisers at 4 years old. Climbing trees; rock climbing; digging holes in the sand at the local beach - wind, rain or shine. So many children are now exclusively 'entertained' indoors or at indoor themed play centres.

It's hardly news though?

Decades ago they showed how parents treat baby boys and girls differently- girls stopped from doing things that boys are encouraged to do - so why be surprised that they behave differently ? Even how babies are carried - boys more likely looking out than girls -

It's gender stereotyping making people more cautious with small girls & ridiculous clothing decisions based on how important it is for girls to be visually appealing.

I think clothing choices are a huge issue. I have never forgotten something Katy Bowmen said about the fact we have separate "exercise" clothes shows the rest of our clothes aren't designed for moving. I've been in clothes I can deep squat in ever since & my children's clothes were always chosen for movement - if they couldn't climb a tree in it I didn't choose it for everyday.

i see primary girls in utterly useless shoes all the time.

She writes about clothing choices for kids here https://www.nutritiousmovement.com/make-sure-their-clothes-are-recess-ready/

@Morwenscapacioussleeves I don't disagree with you, but I also feel the need to add here that I can climb a wall in a ball gown, and have done more than once...

What a role model! Looking forward to your autobiography, thinly disguised as a racy roman-à-clef

I'm not so sure about this. People used to be much more active in fairly normal clothes.

I think exercise clothes are often about wanting to sell people more stuff.

I don't disagree with you, but I also feel the need to add here that I can climb a wall in a ball gown, and have done more than once...

I feel like there is a story here that I need to know.

Of course it's parental ignorance. So many people think boys have more energy and, the old tinky laugh MN favourite, "need to be exercised like dogs" whereas girls are naturally inclined to sit quietly and play with their dolls.

i have boys and this makes me wonder how parents would achieve this. My toddlers want to be outside every chance they get. It’s way easier to just open up the door and let them play outside then listening to them moan or whinge to go outside. Are parents of girls just handing them dolls and saying no when child looks to go outside.

If your boys were redirected to some indoor activities or told that they weren't going outside today, they would adjust to this and stop agitating to 'be outside every chance they get'. Children adapt to their circumstances and they adapt what they ask for based on what they have a reasonable expectation of getting. If you were refusing your boys all the time, they'd stop asking because they'd know they weren't going anyhow.

I work in early years. Girls arrive in shiny shoes, white frilly dresses and have their nails painted. Boys come in joggers.

Half the girls go home filthy and the parents will be like "oh she's such a boy". Half the girls don't get messy because mummy told them not to mess their dress, or they won't go out because a hat would mess their hair.

Early years.

Then those ball gowns count as movement friendly 😃 my kids climbed trees in dresses & wellies sometimes. Long skirts are actually great for most movement & so long as you know how to hoik them up you can climb in them (though flappy stuff is trickier in grabby branches).

most importantly though I assume there was no one to tell you off for endangering your dress!

I'm far more impressed that you managed to climb in (assuming here as I went to several balls in DMs) typical ball shoes.

I’ve twin boys of 4 and a 3 yr old daughter. The boys have always included their sister in their make-believe games and they also take their turn being the cook in their toy kitchen. All 3 have had baby dolls because when their sister was born the boys wanted their own baby to hold. We used to all sit on the sofa holding our babies whilst I was breastfeeding.
When we do go to the play park the boys are protective of their sister and ensure she climbs safely on the equipment.
I’ve never consciously told them to protect her, they’re just caring little boys.

I don’t dress her in clothes that matter if they get dirty or torn but they are typically girl’s clothes. Skirt and t shirt maybe. My boys wear joggers and t shirts.
I enjoy shopping for girls and boys clothes and won’t be made to feel ashamed for dressing my daughter like a little girl.

Our granddaughter at 2 years loved being outside, we have a big garden and she ran riot. There was mud, water, slugs, worms, making mud pies, helping plant flowers. We had a drawer full of old clothes and a pair of wellies and off she'd go. She'd come in filthy, mud in her hair and a worm in her hand, they really were the best days, she was rosy faced and free as a bird.

I was a classic 'tomboy' when I was growing up in the 90s - always picked clothes from the boys section, loved climbing trees and getting mucky. Hated brushing my hair and wouldn't be caught dead in pink or a dress.

Flash forward to when we found out we were expecting a daughter, I was insistent she would be allowed to dress however she liked, play with whatever she liked etc and not conform to silly 'girly' stereotypes. She's 3 now, and turns out she loves all things pink and sparkly, isn't outdoorsy at all and hates getting her clothes/hands mucky. She would MUCH rather be inside Colouring or playing with her role play toys than outside. People might judge and think it's me being precious but it's genuinely her! Not saying it's necessarily a girl thing because like I said, I was the polar opposite, but I'd say most of her female friends are the same whereas her male friends are more inclined to rough, outdoorsy type games. There are exceptions though!! None of the parents are particularly stereotypical on genders it's just how it's panned out..

I agree about kids clothing, the "boys" clothes are generally better quality, warmer, and better suited to active children. Last weekend looking for joggers for my daughter, in one shop I compared the boys and girls joggers for the same age (8), wish I'd taken a photo. Girls joggers are thinner, no working drawstring (if they have one it's decoration only, never functional) and the pockets are much smaller. Both the same price. I bought the ones labelled "boys". I have similarly purchased boys school shoes, trainers, trousers, T-shirts and even swimming stuff (shorts and rash vest).
I've sent complaints to various high street stores for similar discrimination against girls clothing. Still hoping to see changes....

Similar experience to you. I used to get really irritated at the shiny shoes which meant if we wanted to play outdoor games it was always more uncomfortable for them. It affects learning and interests as well.

The sexism starts from birth.

Cuddles/rough play/crying/food- there are sex differences.

I'm quite lazy and don't like getting cold - my girls definitely don't have the energy levels that I can see some boys do. Not sure if it's a genuine difference or they've just inherited my lazy genes.

They also never wanted to get dressed at all, they were always happiest in just knickers which used to make leaving the house a bit tricky.

I was raised by a radical feminist and I'm always pointing out misogyny etc but I'm coming to the conclusion that boys and girls are broadly different.

My son is an outdoor runner abouter. I never was and neither was my sister, despite being dressed in very practical clothing.

Come to think of it my PhD holding wimmins studies mum didn't even take us to the park, that was a dad job until we were old enough to go ourselves, ditto the pool etc. My mum was too busy reading and talking on the phone.

I remember on holiday when DS was small they were offering a t-shirt painting activity with all the materials supplied. It looked so much fun but DS wouldn't hear of it, wouldn't even look at it. Of the kids sitting absorbed in the t-shirt decorating almost all of them were girls. I quite fancied it myself.

I see this played out everywhere, among families who absolutely do not push stereotypes. Meanwhile school actively encourage everyone to do everything. But they're still... boys and girls.

Some great points about dress and stereotyping here.

i do wonder though why we lean towards ‘boys’ play as being of more value than ‘girls’ play… is getting covered in mud better than hand clapping games? Dinosaurs more worthy than dolls? Or do we think of them more highly because of our own conditioning, i.e. the activities are better because they are stereotypically done by boys?

@MorrisZapp I think the trans debate is really shining a light on the differences between the sexes, but I do wonder to what extent what you describe is nature or nurture, with sex based differences so engrained into society I think it's going to take a long time to decipher what is genuinely genetic and what is learned.

Many of my cubs (age 8-10) struggled to ride 3 laps of a football field this summer

Hard agree. Men and women simply aren't the same. Culture and socialisation play a part but I think much of it is native.

This is such a good post. I completely agree! I have two boys and try to avoid stereotypes as much as possible, but they are both incredibly stereotypical boys 😂 obsessed with being outside, cars, bikes, tractors etc etc. they do have toy buggys but they are used as vehicles not for dolls! Lots of parents I know say the same, most with at least one of each. There's nothing wrong with boys and girls playing differently, one is not better than the other.

Also really agree with this, many pp seem to indicate that the 'boys' play of being outside etc is in some way better than what girls are doing and we should ensure girls do the same. Maybe we should just be mindful of stereotypes but otherwise let kids be kids, there are sex differences beyond just genitals, at quite a young age and it's odd to think that would extend into behaviour and play.