Using preferred pronouns in primary school

[itispersonal]

We have just been told a child in our school who has been dressing 'of the opposite gender' is now wanted to change their name and use different pronouns.

Where do teaching staff stand on this... I'm tolerable to using their preferred name but not pronouns and won't be going along that they are of the opposite sex.

New draft consultation from the government looks to side with those who are GC (but it is non statutory) and said no one "should be compelled to use these preferred pronouns"

Agreeing to a child's request to have others use different pronouns about them is a significant decision. Primary school aged children should not have different pronouns to their sex-based pronouns used about them.
For older children, schools do not need to specify pronouns to be used about each pupil and can decline a request to change a child's pronouns. Where a school or college considers a child's request, they should consult the child's parents and consider all the relevant factors as outlined above. Having considered these factors and examined all the evidence, schools and colleges should only agree to a change of pronouns if they are confident that the benefit to the individual child outweighs the impact on the school community. It is expected that there will be very few occasions in which a school or college will be able to agree to a change of pronouns. On these rare occasions, no teacher or pupil should be compelled to use these preferred pronouns and it should not prevent teachers from referring to children collectively as 'girls' or 'boys, even in the presence of a child that has been allowed to change their pronouns. Even in the exceptional case where safeguarding requires a school or college to take an alternative approach, schools and colleges should exhaust all other options, such as using first names, to avoid requiring other individuals having to use preferred pronouns. In these exceptional cases, schools or colleges should make sure that all relevant staff are aware of a gender questioning child's biological sex, to fulfil their safeguarding and legal duties.

Could work take action for not using the preferred pronouns? If when interacting with the child they are still treated with respect. The county council has form for taking staff to court but can't find an update on the appeal.

But that's what got the other teacher sacked!!

I really feel for you OP. I don't think the teacher got sacked for raising a safeguarding concern but for making private information public (if I am thinking of the same case you are). I am a secondary teacher and have pushed back hard on this (and not been sacked so far!) but to be honest I'm not sure I would have done if I didn't have a DP who could support me and dd if the worst happened. The Unions would not support us if we got in trouble over this so they are no help at all. Have you considered joining the Free Speech Union? I have joined in addition to the NEU so I would have their support if needed. There is also SEEN in schools who could offer you support.

Great article and it's how I feel about the child and the situation. Adults need to be truthful about the reality of their sex and allowing them to express themselves how they wish! But socially transitioning and telling them and the other children a lie confuses them and distorts reality!

But that's what got the other teacher sacked!!

Sacked? A teacher at your school was sacked for speaking out specifically about about gender questioning children?

Do you mean at your school or Kevin Lister?

Why are we allowing this? You can't change your sex! Gender is load of sexist bs stereotyped and I'm so sick of it.

There are NO circumstances where this is ok or appropriate. A child who wants to be the opposite sex or take on sexist stereotypes needs therapy, not pandering, Jesus.

No the 'Hannah' teacher,
But there's also Kevin lister and the chaplain at another school. Who got fired for speaking out or following the line!

This is so tricky. I feel for you as if you have a whole SLT supporting the change in name and pronouns you will have problems. Do you teach the child? It worries me that it is compelling other children to lie/believe untruths about this child. What happens when a child disagrees? Are they to be sanctioned by saying the wrong pronoun? Can you sound out some SLT members individually to see if any have the same reservations as you or are open to discussion? Are there other staff members who feel the same? Although I suspect you may be unwilling to have these conversations in case they are referred upwards. Can you speak to your union rep to ask where you stand if another child questions this and you feel it is wrong to use a lie to support the child? Because it could come down to which child you defend and surely then the union should see you have to defend the truth?

Every time a girl has to lie to herself or to others, she can't name accurately who is male and who is female then you are breaking down her instinct, her barriers that all women and girls rely on to keep them safe from male preditors.

I think that some of the teachers with cases that were lost were because they were in breach of a school's social media policy or involved children in their debate.
If you decide to raise any concerns then you need to do so in a way that acknowledges the "management instruction" to comply, reassure that you will not engage in fostering disagreement but - in terms of safeguarding - ask for clarification about certain matters? This could include issues like:

1. Are the instructions written in the light of Cass's warnings about schools engaging in socially transitioning despite the lack of evidence that this is a psychologically "safe" action to carry out on children?
2. How do the new draft guidelines impact on the school's actions.
3. Is there a "script" for adults to use with children who question why a boy now claims to be a girl? (or vice versa)
4. Does this have an impact on discussions about telling the truth with young children?
5. How will misgendering be dealt with? Will children be punished for this?
6. Might there be any subsequent legal challenge to adults who socially transition a primary child in school if when older, the child claims inappropriate adult influence and failure to safeguard them?

There are no easy answers to this. Transactivists have held the public space for so long that issues about children's rights & safety, how little ones negotiate reality and fiction, truth and lies, have all been ignored. Let alone the psychological damage done to a young child:

"Social transition isn’t reversible, because what we tell our children for years can’t be reversed. When we disconnect them from their biological sex, we set up patterns of denial and secrets. We set them up to hate their bodies at puberty, to beg for blockers and binders, because for years we told them they could change sex, and they believed us. They are desperate to go back to the years when no one knew any different, but that time will never come again. Time is not reversible".

(from the Transgender Trend article linked above).

Agree. Why should children have to say the opposite of what they can see is true? I would take my DC out of a school that did this and tell everyone why.

Exactly as MrsO says; work with the system as it is as a professional, so they have no issues.

Ask formally for clarifications within the structure and context of safeguarding. Use direct quotes from Cass and kcsie. Emphasis you are raising a relatively new safeguarding issue that has just been added to kcsie.

Emphasise issues with other children who perhaps have additional needs and may not be able to use preferred names and pronouns. They must not be punished.

Written letters may be the most appropriate method, copy governors in too.

Effective safeguarding is about ongoing reflective practice. It's not the Dbs's and certification. That's just to say you've not got a criminal record and have attended training. It's putting the training into practice.

If someone raises a safeguarding issue through the proper processes, those concerns should be heard and treated accordingly. If they're not, then safeguarding at the school is ineffective. The culture is one of silencing and as evidenced through many previous case reviews, which should have been covered on certified safeguarding training in the school and LA, this is not keeping children safe.

Whistleblowing is a really important part of safeguarding.

I appreciate it's not easy at all - I would have struggled a year ago, but Cass and kcsie and even the draft guidelines, and TT, are tools to be used here with slt.

I'd get it all on record too. If following the correct procedures, you can't be sent to court. The worst is that it's ignored. But I do suspect, even if Labour get in, the medical evidence is going to keep growing

Cass has said that social transition is more likely to lead to medical transition. Children can't consent to that.

The child may grow up to be gay. Ergo it's potentially gay conversion.

These are very good questions. When my school were proposing a policy of immediate social transition I requested a meeting with the Head and DSL (who fully supported the policy - people here are naive if they think every DSL will be against this) where I went through the policy point by point and pointed out where it didn't fit with Cass (the interim review at the time) or KCSIE. The result is it has all been pushed into the long grass and some teachers use new names/pronouns and others don't, which is hardly ideal but is better than the alternative. I would request a meeting OP and go in with a lot of notes and info at your finger tips. Or do similar by email if you prefer to take the time to think and plan it all out.

Those posters advising speaking to the Union are, I presume, not familiar with teaching unions. All the teaching unions are fully signed up to gender ideology and officially hold the view that the new gender questioning guidance is transphobic and ideologically driven (oh the irony). I wouldn't speak to your Union rep unless you know for certain they have GC leanings. (I am NEU rep at my school, but I know the NEU wouldn't lift a finger to help me if I got into trouble over this).

Personallly I would just avoid using pronouns. I teach in a (girls'!) secondary school. We have a few students who have changed name and/or wish to be referred to as 'they' or 'he'. I never do this, I just call them and refer to them by their name.

I work in a secondary school and when this has come up have raised it with SLT.

i am very uncomfortable with the "avoiding pronouns" approach because it feels like crossing fingers behind my back.

Theoretically we can't be compelled to lie but in practice lining up for assembly doesn't feel like a good time to find out how an individual child will respond to the truth.

I don’t know if this will help, but could you go in gently with head/DSL and ask them to read around the topic (Cass Report) rather than blindly agreeing to this. Does the child have any of the known comorbities? Autism, trauma, mental health issues, dysfunctional screen usage?

Also, ask them to think about the impact on the other children in the class/school. Does the child have a sibling?

Is the proposed plan in the best interest of all of these children?

You’re right that there is no statutory guidance but the following may also be useful. It urges extreme caution.
https://questions-statements.parliament.uk/written-statements/detail/2023-07-20/hcws983

It's outdated.

They need to update their resource tools to stuff that reflects Cass.

It's that simple and it's a case that's hard to argue with.

Why to use pronouns at all for kids?

Because it's much harder to remove them entirely from speech!

"Give Lucy back her pencil please Michael"
"David is that your coat or his?"

Because pronouns are a normal part of speech and crop up naturally when you talk. Obviously when talking to someone directly, the pronoun you use is 'you', but when you are in a group of people it's also normal to need to refer to someone in the 3rd person while they are present.

https://sex-matters.org/posts/schools-and-safeguarding/responding-to-the-schools-guidance-consultation/

Have you seen this @itispersonal?

I'm encouraging everyone to respond to the consultation, it ends quite soon.

Wish I could be more helpful. I'm so glad I'm retired ( teacher and adviser) I would have been sacked!

The consultation ended in March. I imagine if Labour gets in the whole thing will be shelved and we are back to square one.

Consider joining the free speech union. I think asking questions persistently 'are we compliant with Cass?' 'is the advice to staff consistent with Gender Critical beliefs being legally viewed as worthy of respect in a democratic society?' 'are there any risks or disadvantages to the child or to other children from this approach?' 'could the school be liable to future law suits if not consistent with Cass?' 'how will the school treat staff who disagree with the request?' 'will staff be encouraged to speak freely about any safeguarding concerns they have in this situation?' Get these questions in front of the governors.

Yeah 😹 it wouldn’t be feasible not to use it.