I give up

[PullUpTheDrawbridge]

FFS I am just so tired of it all. I'm in an unrelated comedy related FB group that is usually light hearted but every now and again, the same old (trans) faces pipe up with their monthly JKR slag-off post. Tonight, for the second month in a row, I gently put my hand up to say not EVERYONE thinks she's bigoted, abusive hate-speaker. Some people think she's standing up for women and children's rights. I got a few likes, but the majority of people took it as a cue to virtue signal their 'be-kind, live-and-let-live, trans-ally' bullshit. I just can't make a dent. Some of the posts are even arguing that GC types are reducing everything to genitals and body stereotypes as if we are the anti feminist ones. I just don't know where to start. Anything you say is immediately hammered down with this sort of bullshit

"This isn't a debate and quite depressing that people are treating it as such, I would hope that fans of XXX would be more progressive as they are. Trans lives aren't a debate. They exist, always have and always will.
Just as society has gone through these moral panics before and targeted communities, it is now happening with the trans community and it is so fucking unacceptable and abhorrent, just as it has been in the past."

"For me it's just the new thing for awful people to hate on. Be who you want to be, as long as you're happy and not hurting anyone it's no one's business but your own. I genuinely don't understand the problem. It amazes me that this is a discussion in our so called 'civilised society"

I'm exhausted with it all. 21K members and I was the only GC voice. What's the point?

I understand that you find it tough going op. It is astonishing the level of ‘kindness’ people are expecting others to perform.

I’m booted off fb, for some reason, and currently only go in to enjoy videos of Kevin Bridges 😄 (he’s lovely) and Ricky Gervais in his many incarnations. And Sarah. 😂 I digress.

But having discussed this on fb in the past, which is why I was booted out I guess, I realised that most people do not actually read what you write! They just get annoyed and angry and pretend you are a bigoted fascist-nazi who wish to kill all the alphabet-soup with your nasty words. Even though all you have said is: biological sex is a fact, and is very important basic facet in how humans organise their societies.
Lordy forbid you even mention safeguarding for women and children.

So I now take it as a given that people will tror out the old B, N, F and soup-killer stuff when the T is discussed. It makes me think of the soup-nazi in Seinfeld.
N.B: Seinfeld has nothing to do with this, except it makes me chuckle.

I don’t have a lot to lose though. My job is fine, my kids are not under the impression that you can change your biological sex - though many of their peers have experimented with social transitions. They’ve seen how that’s panned out and know you can still usually tell which sex someone is. Those I know with dysphoria behave very different, and are acutely aware of their sex.

So keep on chipping away at it.
All of a sudden they’ll all say that of course they didn’t mean it literally! And can’t you take a joke? Or some such.

I think the tide has turned. But it’s a long way back still.

Sorry for ramblings, on phone + kids and dogs to attend to. Lost my own thread of thought several times there 😂

I was in a group yesterday and everyone was able to say they were concerned about it. Including the parent of a child who says they are trans. It was refreshing, as I’d been being careful about one in particular who I feared was fully twaw.

Instead of challenging individuals directly, you might find you get more support if you make a generic and non personal post like 'this group used to be fun, but recently it feels like there's a regular Two Minutes Hate and it creates a bad vibe. There are other groups to discuss how much you hate JKR, this group is to talk about how much we love X.'

For your own sanity leave the group.

@PullUpTheDrawbridge I may know which group this is. Think I can see a smidge of the name (J R-J?) who is the usual trans obsessive / all about me me me in a group I’m in.

I can’t see the posts though, as he blocked me for being a similar lone voice a while ago!

Oh hurray!!!!! Yes I think that's the one. Sooooooo nice to know there's at least one other voice of reason there. I was thinking of leaving but I won't now. I wonder if I am also blocked. Did you see the recent post from a ooor bloke recently owning up to being confused by the trans stuff the other day? I wanted to reply but I can't find it and wondered if he deleted it. I could feel a pile on brewing....

Ah no, I don’t think I did see that. The group is brilliant in many ways (I’ve been there yonks) but the captured ‘no debate’ stance of most re trans stuff is absolutely infuriating. There have been a few times I’ve wanted to jump in & give a bit of billy balance (😉), but found I’m too late and ‘admin have turned off comments’. Boo.

I won’t leave as, embarrassingly, that pod means rather a lot to me. And I’d be genuinely gutted if I got kicked out.

Don’t leave!

I know what you mean. I'd hate to be kicked out. I'm a 'retro' and the pod means a lot to me too. It's seen me through many a dark night, and my whole family are fans. Knowing I'm not the only GC person helps, even if its not always easy to speak up.

Solidarity @PullUpTheDrawbridge. I reckon there are LOADS in there that want to speak up with a dissenting voice. All sweet & lovely that the hosts spread a TWAW ‘be kind’ vibe, but it doesn’t impact them in the slightest so I doubt they really appreciate the impact elsewhere.

(85er, retro-oner. Sorry for derail!)

I've seen some Independent news posts on Facebook this week e.g. about JK Rowling where the majority of reponses agreed with her - a big change from even a year ago.