DS's school - deep in genderwoo

[doublehistrionics]

DS started at senior this term, y9. It's a private school, he was at the prep before.

A couple of weeks in it's clear the school is pretty captured by gender ideology. He has a teacher who is they/them, all the teachers wearing pronouns on their lanyards and DS has been told that he must get it right or he could be sanctioned.

Last week they were invited in to a room, one-by-one and with a tape recorder running asked to state their pronouns, to someone not known to them at all and quite possibly a non-staff member.

I'm pretty exasperated. I've emailed and had a conversation with the head of house who made noises about escalating it and having conversations but I don't believe anything will change.

Anyone else having this experience?

I find the school's actions really quite extreme, the fact it is a private school is even odder as I thought they would be more onside as far as parents are concerned and I felt parents were more anti this agenda.

You're being too polite waiting on an email response.

Phone the school. Tell them that due to no response you will be arriving at X time on X date to discuss this.

Any sort of parent group associated with the school? Complaints always have more force if they think they will lose more money.

Helpful

Someone will be able to say for sure but I suspect there’s a data collection issue if they are collecting data that they don’t actually need to be able to operate

You’re basically paying for your child to be bullied and intimidated. Is there a parental WhatsApp group?

Last week they were invited in to a room, one-by-one and with a tape recorder running asked to state their pronouns, to someone not known to them at all and quite possibly a non-staff member

That is absolutely fucking outrageous. I honestly despair. How far away from actual education can you get?! What is their purpose in making children take part in that? I genuinely don't understand. Are they making them sit with a stranger and tape record their disabilities? Sexualities? Religion?

Do you have a parents WhatsApp group or anything similar? You can't be the only one feeling this way.

My eldest is 7 and I'm just hoping this all calms down in the next 5 years. Not helpful to parents of older children, sorry.

I moved my child to new school because of this, best decision ever. Although it’s not gone away she’s now got a lot more room to grow without the coaching.

This topic is too deep and won’t change in time for your kids.

Semi-retired teacher here. This is disgraceful. I'm certain that the school will say that it's okay because the children were 'invited' and not coerced.

It's really not okay. Children are used to doing as they're told when in school. This was a form of coercion.

I'd be wanting to know exactly who was interviewing and recording my child. I'd also want to know what is being done with the recording.

I'm all for the change of mindset towards gender (mainly), but this is going WAAAY to far!!!!

Personally, I prefer the state school system for many reasons. However...I agree with DeathRattleDazzle. If I were paying for a private education for my child, I'd be damned if I were to tolerate this.

I used to be a full-time middle manager in a Scottish secondary school. Quit 5 years ago. I didn't realise until too late what all this genderwoo was about. There are organisations getting into schools via the back door.

In my last year at my school, a class of 12 yr olds castigated me for saying "Ladies and gentlemen, you may leave."

"That's sexist!"

I had no idea what they were wittering on about. Turns out a particular youth group had visited the school.

One time, my Scottish LA required all its teachers to fill up a questionnaire enquiring into our ethnic background. I was feeling bolshie, so wrote 'The last time someone asked my family this question, they put my granny in a concentration camp.'

[Not lying. I'm Slav on one side of the family.]

I wouldn't do that, you need to keep the upper hand and behave professionally and appropriately.

That said, do not let this lie, if you don't get a reasonable response within 5 working days then I would start the formal complaints process.

what I would ask the school is where they are getting their guidance from? Ask them to direct you to the documents that recommended this approach. The Independent Schools Council and HMC give guidance on Diversity and Inclusion, was it part of their advice to the school?
Or did they receive guidance from a charity, and what safeguarding procedures were taken to check the work of individuals involved creating this pronoun performance.

It’s worth mentioning that the Bayswater Support Group surveyed parents and found that 80% of children who wanted to change their pronouns or declared a non binary status had been bullied. What has the school done to ensure children who proclaim an opposite/non binary pronoun are not the victims of bullying. Do feel free to DM me if you want to.

In addition to the article about safeguarding in schools mentioned upthread, Safe Schools Alliance & Genspect are a fantastic source of advice for parents.

We don't have to put up with this. Too much of what is being taught in schools is unethical and age inappropriate and sadly with the government still prevaricating, parents are having to take on schools alone.
Safe Schools Allaince have a massive range of template letters & other resources:
https://safeschoolsallianceuk.net/

Genspect also have a range of resources including direct support for parents with children caugt up in this, training for schools and advice for parents in dealing with schools:

https://genspect.org/support/

@tinkerella1 I've confirmed where they're getting their resources with them, it's the same place as all the other schools in my area, Stonewall and some really bad news pressure groups.

Maybe you could mention that more and more employers are cutting ties with Stonewall due to their questionable attitudes towards women, children and gay people and their bullying tactics.

Do they have any links with Mermaids?

Which groups? Always good to know which ones to look out for.

Yes I think you need to ask them if they think it would be appropriate to take children into a room, put them in front of someone they don't even know and ask any of those things.

They need a very big rethink.

How much time and energy do you have to devote to this? I did a lot of correspondence and meetings with my DD's school and things did change (e.g. the "Pride" club is now called the Friendly club and is a general #BeNice place rather than TRA nest.

The Safe Schools Alliance, Transgender Trend and Sex Matters resources are pretty hard to argue against so do use them.

It's not like it's a religious school where you know what you're getting.

I doubt any of the parents were told in advance, "choose this school because these are the values that we will teach your kids".

It's actually getting to the point where I'd consider sending my child to a religious school in the hope that they will be taught less woowoo.

That's impressive.

I wonder if maybe people could push for the GC perspective (or associated conservative view) to be taught in schools, if they are going to be exposed to stuff about transgenderism and pronouns.

I mean teach in the sense that this is one perspective that many people have, and these are the arguments that they give.

I would worry that they have abandoned the religious stuff in favour of more fashionable ideas.

I live in France and parents quite regularly post in local Facebook groups asking about how much genderwoo is being taught in state primary schools and whether private Catholic schools are a better option if you want to avoid it.