So ... my client posted a violent fantasy about me!

[HeidiInTheBigCity]

Posted in F&WR in the hopes of an audience who gets what my issue is and can offer advice!

So ... client [insert function; I shall call him X] hates me! This is not all that out of the norm insofar as X seems to hate vendors in general. Not great but also no big deal.

X also seems to dislike me in particular. And - to quote my white, cishet [I know this isn't the lingo around here - using it to reinforce my point] male colleague: "it's just insanely obvious how much more vicious he is in reaction to you compared to any man who has dared to make equally obvious statements!" [specifically, I declined to entertain his demands on the grounds that it would have lost my firm money - and I said so!]. Still: unfortunate, but it happens!

Here's what has freaked me out: a [female] colleague of X's privately pinged me a link to what I can only describe as a violent, hate-fuelled online post filled with gruesome detail about the abuse of [supposedly fictional woman whose name is not quite mine but very eerily similar] saying "you do realise that's X and it's about you?! I'm disgusted!".

The claim is credible. But, at the same time, it's just "anonymous creep on the internet". It's also really disturbing. It makes me feel afraid of X. But dealing with X - even though I know that he hates me - is part of my job.

WWYD?

Op, you don’t seem to have any sense of feeling you have a right to feel safe at work and it is your employers obligation to ensure this is the case? I take this from the way you keep trying to think of what might make your company care. It shouldn’t need any of this extra ‘your data might be compromised if he kidnaps me’. If you feel you need to then make it clear it’s because you’re a woman- he wouldn’t do this to a man.

Russell brand publicly discussed assaulting women,share violent sexual fantasies and joked about raping women.

Just saying.

If ever there was a time the police are going to take this really seriously - it's now.

You're scared for a reason.

And tell HR after you're reported it to police. This is a criminal matter, not an HR one.

I actually think the tip off person was wrong to tell you and actually should have informed their employer.

If nothing else, reporting to the police will crystallise for your workplace that this is a serious, frightening and potentially illegal situation. It may help show them how seriously they need to take it.

I would hope they would anyway. If an employee came to me with something like this I'd be calling fucking Prevent, Interpol, and lawyers and kicking up a major fuss.

We've had creeps try to creep on staff before, sometimes because they are 'big' clients they feel they are entitled. They have been booted.

Creeps can fuck right off, nobody should EVER feel afraid or intimidated by an arsehole at work.

https://www.acas.org.uk/sexual-harassment
https://www.acas.org.uk/discrimination-and-bullying

Gather documentation.

Screenshot of the post and your email exchange on the business matter that triggered it along with anything that supports the circumstantial evidence - that he hates you, that he’s an Arsenal fan, previous posts under that username that indicate it’s him etc.

Because the absolute first thing he’s going to do is deny it was him.

Yes,this is important

Can you say with 100% certainty it was targeted at you and can you prove this?

Thanks for all the replies!

Some responses:

• no, I absolutely cannot prove in any definitive form that it's him/me. Tons of circumstantial evidence, no smoking gun!

-.I've handled it as follows: called very senior leadership, explained situation. Was told to let them handle. For all practical intents and purposes, this may entail anything between "will tell client bosses they sanction him or else" and "I literally get downgraded to 'toothless tiger - account manager no longer authorised to speak to clients without chaperone'". I don't know this yet - what I do know is that - from a personal standpoint - regardless of the outcome I'm relieved that X is no longer for me to handle.

Will update if I find out more.

Well done for bringing the is up - everything is crossed that he gets the boot and there are no repercussions for you.

Officially yes, you are kept confidential, in reality however:-
I have been that witness, to a harrowing crime. I knew if he knew that I was the witness, he would come after me. And it took a tiny "mistake" by an officer who left my entire statement with my name and address on, out where he could see it while being interviewed.

I had to move quite far away, as (I'm sure you would have guessed this) he got off with a suspended sentence.

@Winnading, that it horrifying, not even remotely surprising and the reason why I am refusing to expose who has tipped me off about this.

I think as this is a matter of personal safety you are well within your right to ask that sebior leadership i form you of what action they will be taking.

remember: you have done absolutely nothing wrong, and this man is in the best case scenario extremely strange, and in the worst case scenario, a potential criminal.

Your employers need to protect you, respect you, and in no way should you be 'downgraded'

do not go into this apologetic, you havedone NOTHING wrong.Youshould be bloody pissed offx