So ... my client posted a violent fantasy about me!

[HeidiInTheBigCity]

Posted in F&WR in the hopes of an audience who gets what my issue is and can offer advice!

So ... client [insert function; I shall call him X] hates me! This is not all that out of the norm insofar as X seems to hate vendors in general. Not great but also no big deal.

X also seems to dislike me in particular. And - to quote my white, cishet [I know this isn't the lingo around here - using it to reinforce my point] male colleague: "it's just insanely obvious how much more vicious he is in reaction to you compared to any man who has dared to make equally obvious statements!" [specifically, I declined to entertain his demands on the grounds that it would have lost my firm money - and I said so!]. Still: unfortunate, but it happens!

Here's what has freaked me out: a [female] colleague of X's privately pinged me a link to what I can only describe as a violent, hate-fuelled online post filled with gruesome detail about the abuse of [supposedly fictional woman whose name is not quite mine but very eerily similar] saying "you do realise that's X and it's about you?! I'm disgusted!".

The claim is credible. But, at the same time, it's just "anonymous creep on the internet". It's also really disturbing. It makes me feel afraid of X. But dealing with X - even though I know that he hates me - is part of my job.

WWYD?

Not as far as I know - no crime number is issued.

In the OP's case, IANAL, but I cannot see what offence has been committed. It is sadly not unlawful to describe your violent fantasies about women online - it if were, half of the internet would be closed down. If the creep had sent the post to the OP, it might be different, but he hasn't

Has it been posted publicly? How did the person who sent it to you come across it?

This is horrible, OP. I'm so sorry.

I'm not quite so sure that police would be disinterested - I know of a [slightly] similar situation that the police took very seriously as a credible threat and issued a warning. I think if nothing else recording it is worth your while - keep any and all evidence.

yes I agree, I think any matter of recording is necessary. I imagine an ideal situation would be for you never to work with him again, and also for him to know that it has been legally recorded

That is so scary. You should insist you're not going to work with him.

I would love to be proved wrong! It's horrible for the OP.

Reading along and appreciating all suggestions, considering.

Please note that I shall share absolutely nothing about the person who tipped me off or her circumstances that I haven't said already - this is still the Internet and I will not want to put her at risk in the exceedingly unlikely event someone should happen to come across this!

Does it have his name on it? If so an anonymous email to his HR and manager could be sent.

In light of the recent Russell Brand controversy they should be pretty hot on cracking down on creepy behaviour.

certainly don’t meet one on one with him ever going forward.

It doesn't have his name on it - it does have a user name that is plausible.

Again, fictionalised version:

Think along the lines of "he's the biggest Arsenal fan out there - and the user name is 'EmiratesVIPBox'".

Again, not that, but comparable. It's clear it's him. But it's all circumstantial.

This is the Met, but will be the same for anywhere:

https://www.met.police.uk/advice/advice-and-information/har/harassment-on-social-media/

'If there has only been a single communication, it’s unlikely it would qualify as harassment, but could be considered a malicious communication. For such an offence to be committed, a message must be sent to another person, or sent via a public communications network, that is indecent, grossly offensive, obscene, threatening or menacing.
How to report online harassment, malicious messaging or distribution of private sexual images without consent

You can report harassment, malicious messaging or distribution of private sexual images without consent online or by calling us on 101.

We will be able to confirm whether an offence has been committed, based on the full facts and your individual situation. In order to assist us with our investigation you must not respond to the message as it may encourage the sender and make the situation worse.

If possible, take a screenshot of the message so if it gets deleted later there will still be a record of what was said.'

At my work we do training videos about scenarios where clients are offensive/abusive, and the message is to report it. Your company has a duty to protect you from abusive interactions, regardless of how senior you are. The suggestion above to take this up with client firm’s HR to investigate sounds the best approach to me. They won’t want their firm degraded in reputation by such behaviour.

do the police ever keep witnessess confidential - so if OPs friend was to confirm she knew it was from him, would that help it be recorded and could she remain anonymous?

Maybe don't see it as demanding rectification, but as avoiding future contact.

"After his meeting with Eleanor, your Junior Staffer posted this violent fantasy about Ellie. I'm afraid my company will not agree to any more contact with Junior Staffer; none of us feel safe dealing with him now that we know what's going on behind the mask. We will be happy to continue dealing with your company if you would like to appoint a different contact person."

Of course only do this if you're genuinely prepared for them to choose not to buy from you any more.

I'd play merry hell about this.
Tell HR. Show and tell the client. Tell his seniors. Post it on Twitter. Rent one of those cars with a megaphone on the roof. Spend the afternoon in a sign writing plane. Let him know you KNOW.

You never need deal with this scumbag again. I wouldn't, and I'd let the world know why.

@Moonlamp, this is such a stressful situation, but this has made me laugh out loud!

Thank you!

Just seen your post about the ID being circumstantial. Might it still work to say, "It looks a lot like Junior Staffer has posted this. Because we believe it is him, we do not feel safe dealing with him."

I assume that removing him from the account would not constitute a sanction, which he could then claim was unfair. And you'll have marked his card with his HR should they get future reports about him.

In the anonymous online post, "Ellie" is a conniving, cold-hearted psychopath who deliberately demands an over-the-top price for [basically A service] to humiliate the poor protagonist. He, consumed by righteous anger, waited for her to leave her office after dark and violently rapes, murders and dismembers her.

I find the fact that he needs a moral justification to do it in his own fantasy particularly chilling, actually.

can you her a solicitor to send him an official letter saying 'this is allegedly from you, it as been recorded, WE KNOW. Din't even think about it motherfucker'

motherfucker is a terrible choice of slur on mumsnet. apologies.

DICKHEAD will do just nicely

If your firm are at all worth working for they will happily lose this client but the first step is to explain to client. I would prefer to take someone senior management with me to a senior representative at the client since it is seriously scary, to explain your firm will no longer engage with them x in any way shape or form and of course their internal processes are theirs to manage but if he isn’t removed completely from any engagement with your firm you will have to drop them as a client. I would go to the police before my management just to know if there is anything they can do- quite probably not which is ugh but find out.

@Ereshkigalangcleg, I hadn't considered that but, yes, it's actually weird! As though he requires permission from some kind of a moral authority in some sort of an infantile fashion. Not quite grown up enough to simply rape, kill, and mutilate. Pretty Norman Bates, if you look at it that way!

Now, I'm genuinely not sure if that is less or more scary. Probably a bit of both!

On the upside: I think I may have thought of someone who will be concerned and won't care all that much about whether or not this is likely to hold up in court: so, corporate security might be mostly concerned about the risk of my devices falling into the hands of a madman if I should happen to get abducted - but they've been known to jump into action for lesser stuff!

... above all: security will happily deal with coming up with a mitigation plan for such situations. In other words: I get to hand this off!

Does their company have a whistleblowing scheme? Google it - if they're a big org it might be online with an easy way of accessing it. You could also ask your contact who sent it if they'd be prepared to whistle blow, it's usually anonymous.

Now, I'm genuinely not sure if that is less or more scary. Probably a bit of both!

I think it's more. There's a lot of thinking going on, not just a mindless sexual fantasy.

He knows it's wrong to fantasise about doing that, he thinks he can justify it to himself by making you morally inferior to him. Raping and murdering someone can't be done morally, it's weird predator logic. You should definitely seek assistance, don't leave it.