Girls missing out again

[FedUpOfAllThisBollocks]

DD applied for a Head Girl position at the end of term and all candidates were emailed wi5h the results a few nights ago.

2 boys appointed as Head Boys, out of the girl candidates, 4 were chosen as prefects.

Apparently, a pupil complained that the Head Boy Head Girl label was discriminatory against pupils who didn't identify as such. But, it's the girls who miss out yet again, isn't it. DD's Instagram group is filled with messages of "see, boys are superior" and the old shit starts up again.

Fed up of all this shit affecting our daughters. Out of the candidates that were female were some pretty outstanding characters so I have absolutely idea why this decision has been allowed. Apparently, it was a student vote but moderated by staff.

DD is in a big standard mixed comprehensive school in a bog standard type town.

Any advice before I tackle this?

In my experience the boys will always vote for other boys whereas the girls will vote for the person they feel will do the best job. I fully accept that this is not the case everywhere but this has been the case for my 3 children.

Misogyny starts early

Why on MN does it always have to come down to being naive and ignorant? Do you label everyone when they have a different opinion?

Yes @RoyalGala, the girls would vote for boys too. It's ingrained in all of us in society from birth that girls are here to serve boys. I am very jealous of you, but somewhat flabbergasted, that you have somehow missed this.

No mention of ethnicity too ? Surely they need to have a head <insert ethnic descriptor> boy and girl too ?

Also, were all pupils eligible to stand ? If not it all seems a tad ageist.

And that's before we get to students on the spectrum.

I can see why these things get scrapped ...

Wrong on both counts but you continue belittling others that have a different opinion to you

I didn't 'label' you, @RoyalGala , I asked a question about the statement I quoted.

I am flabbergasted you’re jealous of me for having a different opinion but ok 😂
Both the boys and girls were allowed to vote, where is the sexism? I could understand if only the boys were allowed to vote but that wasn’t the case was it, they both had equal rights to vote for the best candidate.

You were basically calling me naive and ignorant.

But they wouldn't have voted for the best candidate!!! Fml, this is like banging one's head against a brick wall. Some would have voted for the best candidate, and others would have voted for the boys, BECAUSE they're boys!! That is our society. Everyone (almost 😂) knows that and it's literally precisely why they have female only categories. Years of patriarchy to be balanced out. It's the same in South Africa for example, with ethnicity - The oppressed need to be given the opportunity to address the balance.

I'd be glad to be proved wrong. But you don't seem to understand that sexist assumptions often underlie assessment who is the 'best' candidate.
It seems highly unlikely that the boy who's now making nasty comments about girls being inferior was actually the best candidate for a leadership role, and certainly not for one where he's presumably supposed to equally lead girls and boys.

Also voting for the best candidate is most certainly not what we do - or have ever done - in the UK. So this is probably a great teachable moment.

Were there more girl candidates than boy? More candidates means the vote splits more ways...

That is something one should take a screenshot of and make a formal complaint.

not head boy (head girl, head person, whatever!) material. And the prefects clearly shouldn’t be expected to work with him in any position of authority.

and no, I do not think yabu! Not at all. But school will probably say that this was merit based or make some other kind of shitty excuse.

Why make assumptions that the boys vote for the boys. In my DD class there are two girl prefects, there are far more boys in the class, so on that basis, boys don’t all vote for boys. So clearly not our society. So if they didn’t vote for the person who they thought was best suited, what did they vote for? 🤷🏻‍♀️

Why make assumptions that the boys vote for the boys.

That's not what she said.

So if they didn’t vote for the person who they thought was best suited, what did they vote for?
They may have done (or it may have been more like a popularity contest, one reason having these roles decided by student vote may not be wise). The question is, what was the basis for them thinking these were the most suitable, one of them seems to have proved otherwise.

@RoyalGala - they voted for male approval.

‘others would have voted for the boys, BECAUSE they're boys!!’

^^She did make that assumption. Should we also assume girls vote for girls too just because they’re girls?

Realistically, what are the school meant to do, ‘We need to have a re-vote because two boys were voted for head students.’

What happens next year if two girls get voted, another revote?
Do you think it may have something to do with schools dealing with sexual dysphoria and boys/girls identifying as the opposite sex? Because how would that work?

Should I also complain because two girls were voted prefect in my DD’s class when the ratio to boys and girls is about 60/40.

And where is your evidence for that?

DS' school did this too and it ended up with the reverse - it had always been two head boys and two head girls.

In his year group and the year group below there were three head girls and one head boy. I noticed that this year it's back to two of each (called head students).

Absolutely this.
Start again, those two candidates removed.
And agree about student vote. Nominations, yes, but staff should have final say.

All those comments that DD is seeing on SM, she should screenshot them and send them with a written objection to the creation of 2 head boy posts , using the comments as evidence of the problem it's causing.
Complaint to go to head and governors.

Yes, internalised misogyny.

She should screen shot the comments, take them to the head teacher and ask what they will do about deacrimination against female students.

Feminists: women should be allowed to vote!
Women: vote
Feminists: no not like that!

Sigh

@RoyalGala

You misunderstood the 'because they're boys' bit - that means that people - both male and female - vote for boys simply because they're boys.

Because they seek male approval.

You then asked for evidence that people seek male approval.

I am genuinely stunned that you haven't come across this entirely normal phenomenon which occurs across all levels of our society.

Take mumsnet for a start. If you've read even a few random threads you will discover very very quickly that many women will put up with ANYTHING, any appalling behaviour from men, just to have a man. Male approval means everything to those poor women who have been conditioned to believe that is the pinnacle. I'm sure someone will have started a thread about a dreadful partner in the last few hours.

Example number 2. Football. Far more interest in men's football than women's. Despite it being equally exciting. Prime Minister/President of FA didn't even bother going to watch England in the World Cup Final. There's no chance they would have missed the men's. None.

I could go on and on with examples, but I won't because it's a slight detail of the thread, the whole point of the thread being that females have once again been passed over for males.

If you haven't noticed that this is insidious in our society, I honestly dont know what to say.