Do you hide your GC views under a bushel?

[lurchermummy]

I have a lot of liberal, left leaning friends. They are all about inclusivity. I know I am GC but tend to keep quiet about it because I feel I will be shouted down or seen as a right wing reactionary. It seems that Mumsnet is the only safe space to air such views. Anyone else have this experience? Am I a coward??

I hide mine under an enormous sculpture of JKR which I carry about in a builder's hod at all times.

I am open with my family and close friends - we are all lefty liberal but seem to agree on this, maybe it’s age - but I’m very cautious with people I don’t know well, other school mums etc. My town is very ‘woke’ and there’s a lot of virtue signalling, I think I’d be a pariah.

I’ve given up trying to talk about it irl. All my friends believe twaw - even my husband is fully signed up. Feels like I’m the only one who thinks this way sometimes, though I know that’s far from true really.

You are a coward, but so am I, and tbh this is quite rational for many of us given what we've seen. I don't mind losing friends if they'd dump me for such views, but I can't afford to lose my job, which sadly is a real possibility. I don't have the fortitude to go through a "crowdfund over a hundred thousand pounds, win at Employment Tribunal" process, though I am lost in admiration of those who do. So as it is, I fund such ventures, write letters to politicians, sign very moderate things, and hope for better times ahead. Oh yes, and resolve never to vote for any politician who thinks humans can change sex.

Oh and I emailed my local councillors in support of a GC meeting that the trans lobby were trying to block - that felt quite good.

Glad I'm not alone. Thankfully DH at least is very much aligned with my thinking. I have a DD who went through a period of being unsure about her identity and presented as very non binary for a while - she has a lot of gay friends (which I have no issue with at all) so I tread a little more lightly with her although I think even she agrees that the TWAW view is very problematic especially for gay women.

I have lost so many friends that I now just keep my mouth shut - I am slightly ashamed of myself for this but I am also so upset about having lost friends

I'm cautiously open about it but I work in a captured organisation.

I'm cautious with two of my (young adult) DSC because they get heated and upset if I don't agree that TWAW. Am open with my own DC and other DSC - DD and DSD2 agree with me (though won't challenge the older siblings about it), my DS disagrees with me but he's still interested in my views and likes to challenge and be challenged so we can be open.

I used to be very cautious at my old workplace because it had a big LGBT+ inclusivity policy that meant I could end up in trouble for expressing my views. Trans issues never came up as part of my job so I saw no reason to go looking for trouble. I'm now at a smaller company where it's just not really an issue.

Most of my friends are in their 40s or 50s and I don't know anyone who's really into all the trans stuff. They think it's all a bit weird. I think it's a much more taboo subject with the young for some reason.

No. It's important to me that I can never be accused of believing that people can change sex or denying the obvious biological differences between men and women.

@KohlaParasaurus I would never lie about my views on it if asked - when I say I’m cautious, I mean I just avoid those conversations.

Absolutely not. But I am self employed, very senior in my field, and I've paid off my mortgage. I can stick my head over the parapet, and so I have to, because so many can't.

I hide mine but it’s because someone hunted me down and reported me to my employer as a TERF when I liked a few of JK’s tweets and disagreed with a hypnobirthing company’s post on Facebook. I only share my views anonymously now which is sad

Bloody hell.

I talk to friends about it if it comes up, but work is totally captured, including my immediate lovely team. They are such great colleagues, all female, but their personal beliefs and the work we do often does not align with mine. So I keep my thoughts to myself at work, except for one or two individuals who are friends

I'm mostly pretty open. DH is onside, as is one of the DC, but we can at least all talk about it to a point (though one DC seems to consider me a bit of a Neanderthal).

There's only one person in my (large) social circle who seems to be TWAW but I suspect a few more probably are, it's just never come up. Suspect a few of the ILs probably are too because some of them are arse-achingly right on and lefter-than-thou.

@Passmeaplacard what happened to you is shocking. 💐

I have a few friends in real life who share my views and I can be open with. A few more who are somewhat receptive and I consider a work in progress :-) Most I don't mention it with. I have some close friends who are very TWAW and I fear it would be the end of those friendships, though I suspect it will probably all come out one day. Funnily enough, its one of the few things my parents and I agree on, which has made a nice change!

My family know but I don't discuss it with most of my friends. There's one friend I know agrees with me so we chat about it.

It's ridiculous really.

There's one friend who was very vocal on facebook about being GC when her child was young, but I know her DH is a labour councillor. I'm really interested to know her views!

I have curbed who I express my views to massively. A child my DC is friends with (primary school) came out as non binary and I became aware that my DC was likely to repeat my opinions and it become a) distressing to the child and b) distressing to my child who wouldn't understand why he would be told off for speaking truth

I don't believe it's the child's decision at all, feels very uncomfortable and pushed on them by the parent who wants to be super progressive. So many red flags I could give for examples but I'll just name my biggest concern - when they are playing being a "girl" it's extra pink, fluffy, stereotypical and "boy" is extra blue, messy, stereotypical down to items that there is no way that child could put together on their own and also seems like a heck of expense on new clothes etc rn. I'm just grateful that hopefully for now they are only going with non binary and not the whole hog

Thankfully my own DC seems unconcerned and disinterested by it all and simply accepts his mate "Ashley" (not real name) his words "mum Ashley says they're sometimes a girl but also sometimes a boy, I don't mind what he is but I want to play football with him still" - told him to crack on whatever Ashley thinks he is. Ashley is great at football and a kind person. Just call him Ashley - saves confusion over using any he/she words.

I fucking hate that I'm hiding from what I want to teach my own child to save hurting someone else's more than I feel they're already doing

I still feel a bit new to all of this, but cautiously bring it up and have been delighted that all of my close friends are of the same view.

DH fully on board, particularly after I showed him the parody of a woman (DM) and he saw worrying changes in his workplace. He wouldn’t bring it up in conversation though.

I’m slightly more cautious with some family but wouldn’t ever lie

No. I'm self employed so no boss for anyone to dox me to. Some of my customers have brought the subject up,in a 'I can't believe this nonsense' stuff,and I've helpfully shared my Terfy views which have always been well received.

I did have a short lived job in a school which flew the pride progress flag and had two LQBTQ clubs,both entirely populated by girls. I worked on the vocational side with young lads who were struggling in an academic setting or who had special or social needs. It was quite scary how influenced they were. One told me that he had X number of brothers,but one was gay so he was really a sister.I had to point out that gay men are not female,which he said was 'a good point'.
Another young man who was already under social services and had an extremely disfunctional family, had been completely Stonewalled and told me about all the different sexualities that he'd learnt about .He would have been 13 at the time. Interestingly,the boys freely admitted that they were sexist,but would never ever have admitted to being racist or homophobic. I didn't stay long in that job as I couldn't be doing with all the rainbow shit and policing what I said or posted on line.

Friends wise,all my friends are from a farming or horsey background and therefore are firm believers in biology,so no issues there.

I am open with family and friends but cautious at work. I work in Education and don't have the guts energy to get involved with tricky debates. I'm also selective with my daughter as she gets v upset but is slowly becoming more enlightened.

Nope. Only come across two people that have said ‘aww but the poor men’ or ‘well, intersex…’. One is a teacher who changed his tune when he realised that his daughter was going into changing rooms and the other is a lost cause (he is right-on luvvie Amnesty devotee).

Can talk with my husband - he is completely on board and thinks the worlds gone mad.

He runs a business that has public toilets and is very strict on the rules ‘if you have a cock you use the gents’ no ifs no buts about it.

we have a niece that was non binary during early teens - now at 18 she’s very much a women and had has a lovely boyfriend.

At work it seems to be mainly men saying TWAW!

I avoid talking about it with young adults at work as they seem the most evangelical about it but I can't lie. I just can't. Most of my friends are GC although I have a few American friends who are very TWAW which, whilst not surprising I guess, seems weird as they seem to have suddenly decided it?