Megan Newborough: another beautiful and vibrant young woman murdered in the prime of her life

[EmmatheStageRat]

…just that really. The images of this beautiful and vibrant young woman haunt me. She was nearly decapitated by her boyfriend murderer, Ross McCullam. Just WHAT are parents of boys teaching them about positive relationships with females?

Cannot believe pp having a go about the use of the word beautiful as if that's what's important here.

I never said it wasn't men, but the idea that if it was men being murdered something would be done about it is ridiculous. Men are murdered at twice the rate of women and nothing is done.

I hadn't heard of this case. RIP, Megan Newborough. It's unbearable to read these stories.

Language does really matter, it is the foundation of concepts and ideology. If we focus on attractiveness of female victims, we are perpetuating the stereotypes that objectifies women in the first place.

We are all misogynists, we should acknowledge our own sexism.

Yes, but the circumstances and dynamics are very, very different.

The word 'beautiful' really doesn't automatically have to be followed by an essay on objectification. It's often an expression of respect, of heartfelt compassion, or of appreciation of youth or goodness.

The young boys who recently tragically drowned were also called 'beautiful boys'.

Men are also usually murdered by men. The truth is that a lot of men in positions of power want to reserve the right to dominate someone else physically. They wouldn't do it, because they're 'one of the good guys', but let's not be hasty about dismantling male power and privelege.

I agree @ArabellaScott , but it is a valid thing to question that shouldn't be shot down.

I agree with this although I didn't pick at the OP because I assumed she was coming from the beautiful soul side of things.

But it is important in a wider sense.

The police wouldn't believe me when I was raped because I wasn't pretty enough, now let's face it the police are pretty crap with rape anyway and if it wasn't my looks it would have been something else but still

And for work I insist in staying an extra night in a hotel after going to one of our office as otherwise I have to change at a very small, very lonely unmanned train station late at night. the female managers get it, the males ones not so much and when I get explain I get looks or little comments that basically boil down to 'no one would want to rape an ordinary middle aged women like you'

I know this is rape not murder but its a similar sort of subject I guess.

But I do understand the OPs sentiments in mourning the loss of yet another women due to male aggression

Perhaps, but perhaps not in a thread where the OP is expressing her sorrow.

Outside I'm so sorry to hear the police didn't help. That's appalling.

If men were being murdered at the rate of at least 2 a week by their female partners, in dreadful and violent ways often involving sexual assault... then there would be a huge focus on it by men. No doubt about it. The fact that men don't care about other men getting killed in addition to women being killed isn't a plus point for women. Or some kind of refutation that it's an issue, or whatever else is used to move away from discussing the origins of male violence.

The circumstances are usually much different. There is a revenge aspect, or some dispute. Or gang related. Or deemed to be self defence. There is an involvement on both sides. That’s not to trivialise them. All murders are despicable.

But the murder of defenceless women at the hands of these perpetrators in these circumstances are beyond. It is like a sport. A nasty blood sport. Punishment for being a certain gender. If any other demographic were being persecuted like this it’d be wheedled out.
I don’t see any football team kneeling to stamp out misogyny.

I'm not a misogynist ffs. And OP never said anything about attractiveness. Give over.

Nor am I a misogynist. I am the parent of two young girls, both of whom are extremely vulnerable. I despair of a world where we would rather navel gaze or consult our dictionaries or thesauruses rather than tackle the fact that too many girls and women are being killed by men.

@ArabellaScott , I was beginning to regret having started this thread but if one more person now knows about this case, then maybe it was worth it?

I don’t make any judgements about your headline. I take it as meaning another beautiful life brutally taken rather than in the aesthetic sense.

but that’s beside the point. Why we are not as a society utterly appalled by the what seems to be an escalating level of violence and hatred against women - ALL women - is astonishing.

we need men to start feeling appalled too. But they don’t have empathy for women, and it drives me mad wondering why the fuck not?

why are men not utterly outraged by this? As I said before we have the stamp out racism everywhere in the media. Footballers campaigning about gay rights and trans rights. Why? Because it affects THEM.

they show no concern or responsibility to women despite the mutilated bodies showing up on an almost daily basis.

And I am not saying they are complicit in their disinterest, but it’s actually hard not to think they are. They just do not see it. Like it’s of little or no consequence. And that’s because society covers it up sufficiently they don’t HAVE to see it.

horrific

and I get enraged by the media plastering the pretty faces of the victims all over the papers, actually. Less focus on the victims please let’s give them their dignity. Instead put the evil mug of the perpetrators up so we can see what we’re fostering and nurturing as a society and all the ugliness that goes with it.

time to get this addressed.

I'm not sure about that last point, tbh. Focus on victims rather than perpetrator has been something many people have asked for - so that hopefully the victims are remembered and given more weight than those who took their lives.

From one local case, I know that I was very upset to see the murderer's face used in the local paper's website. I just never want to see it nor hear his name again.

This can’t be repeated often enough.

Men get killed for all kinds of reasons. And I’m not making excuses for any of those killers.
Women get killed by men usually because they are women.

I don’t make any judgements about your headline. I take it as meaning another beautiful life brutally taken rather than in the aesthetic sense. but that’s beside the point. Why we are not as a society utterly appalled by the what seems to be an escalating level of violence and hatred against women - ALL women - is astonishing.

@Mezmer, I agree.

Megan's dad described her as a “beautiful, treasured daughter"

So I think OP's title is appropriate.

A figure that is doubled when counting deaths attributed to self-euthanasia by women who've been subject to domestic violence.

Perhaps most troubling is data from Professor Sylvia Walby, whose research estimates that approximately one in eight of all female suicides and suicide attempts in the UK are due to domestic violence and abuse. This equates to 200 women taking their own lives and 10,000 attempting to do so due to domestic abuse every year in the UK. That’s nearly 30 women attempting to complete suicide every single day.

www.hestia.org/blog/domestic-abuse-suicide

It does seem that violence against women is both increasing and being increasingly accepted.

I don’t want to derail this thread, but I’m reminded of the film Adult Human Female that transactvists prevented from being shown in Edinburgh. Women peacefully wishing to see a film were forced away by angry zealots while the police looked on.

Many of us have attended, or been forced away from, meetings where men outside were screaming and banging on the windows, again with police standing by.

This passive acceptance by police is dangerous. Every time we see this, the lesson is reinforced: women do not have full human rights. The state will not defend the rights we think we have. We do not have the right to do anything that men don’t want us to do. Credible threats of violence, by men against women, are acceptable.

This too is something we have to oppose.

I’m an older, cynical woman quite hardened to the challenges of life but I sat and wept when I saw Megan’s smiling face on the news last night.

My family didn’t know what was wrong when I just burst into tears. As a mother of daughters my heart just broke when I thought of all the families of these lovely young women in the news lately brutally murdered by damaged dysfunctional men.

There should be some lifelong tracking system of men who exhibit red flag aggressive misogynistic behaviours. We do it for other people in society - eg. football hooligans used to have to hand their passports into the police etc.

More awareness is needed on how vulnerable women and girls are to male perversion and violence. Statistics on DV, home abuse and crime need to made public.

I don’t think it’s because women being murdered is ‘tolerated’, he’s been jailed for life. 99.999% of men don’t commit crimes like this. Equally I don’t blame his parents - they’re not responsible for his actions.

I think there will ALWAYS be tragic, horrific cases like this, no matter how much we try to ‘educate’ men or punish their actions. They’re human anomalies, there will always be psychopaths and sadists.