But that doesn't mean we all have three legs to some extent
I like that :)
"We might all have three legs" is a very good response.
If someone has an unusual structure, such as some trace different genetic cells, which may even be a different sex, that's interesting, but irrelevant. (Except I guess to people designing genetic tests who need to be aware of that possibility?)
If someone actually has a real development disorder, then that's a medical condition that needs to be dealt with. Whether it's a sexual one or not.
Sexual development disorders are no different from any other disorder, except that they're being leveraged to break the male/female separation.
Fortunately we only have one human species around - neanderthals are extinct. But if there was more than one species present, and any laws in place to protect for discrimination or whatever, we'd have the similarly unpleasant sight of people trying to use Downs Syndrome or just daft genetic anomalies like that woman's to argue they could identify as a different species.
Classification by sex is necessary in some circumstances to uphold the rights of 50% of the population. Doing so, and hence requiring individuals with DSDs to fit into that framework is by far the lesser of two evils. And treating people with DSDs as male or female, is conceptually sounder than saying they're neither.