Newsletter from school

Thumpsquids · 02/02/2022 11:29

Remove your child, ASAP.

Thelnebriati · 02/02/2022 11:34

I think I would because I wouldnt want that language normalised in the classroom. Especially if they aren't tackling actual homophobia and bullying among pupils.
Do they monitor bullying, or any other outcomes to record their progress?

SportsMother · 02/02/2022 11:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SportsMother · 02/02/2022 11:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThisIsYourLifeToo · 02/02/2022 11:38

Telling us to use the word partner and not husband / wife.

If this had happened in my DCs schools most parents in the school would have called for a meeting - no way this would have been acceptable. What do other parents think?

I wouldn’t keep my child in that school.

ArabellaScott · 02/02/2022 11:49

Send them Yogyakarta Principle #6.

Tell them 'cis' is considered offensive.

Tell them 'queer' is considered offensive.

Ask if they have any idea about what 'queer theory' is based on?

Calennig · 02/02/2022 12:00

Telling us to use the word partner and not husband / wife.

DH is a lecturer and it's something he's noticed for a while that younger colleagues will not use wife. For example he'd say I'll have to get going as meeting wife - and they'd ask oh where are you meeting your partner.

I don't know how widespread that it but wonder if he noticed as that was how we were dealing with DC getting terms/word wrong you'd model back correct phrase.

I'm not sure what I'd do with the school primary I'd be more likely to have a word ideally I;d have word with the secondary but frankly with DC secondary there are lots of issues and they wouldn't listen as tehy don;t seem to with anything raised - so I'd be more inclined to leave it but keep an eye on the situation.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 02/02/2022 12:04

Partner makes sense if you don't know the person (as could be either sex or unmarried). But surely you should respect what they want to be known as?

Rightsraptor · 02/02/2022 12:04

If they are telling you, the parents, not to say 'my husband/wife' but to say partner instead that is so far outside their remit as to be totalitarian. We have never, or not till the last 5 minutes, referred to people we know as 'they'. It's insulting. Certainly we can use it for unknown people. Don't anyone try to 'queer' me.

I echo the others - remove your child.

Original poster

Grade8piano · 02/02/2022 12:04

Thank you, the above reflects my views. I read all this tosh (there was reams of it), and thought ‘Is this ok? Am I really so far out in my thinking?’

OP posts:

Calennig · 02/02/2022 12:10

I think that was DH point - they knew he was married knew he was happy with wife term - and husband so why correct him to partner.

Maybe they thought I should be offended by wife term never met them - or not really but there have been a few incidents of staff being offended on behalf of others - which has always ended badly for everyone and breed resentment - though DH seemed to think it was some generational trend - though I've not noticed it.

Calennig · 02/02/2022 12:15

On plus side at leadst they are being up front - a lot of the concerning stuff our DC have encounted was never been run past parents at all and some seems to come directly from welsh government.

If you can move your child to another school or belive a complaint may get somewhere - I'd do that.

Calennig · 02/02/2022 12:17

safeschoolsallianceuk.net/

These people may be worth a look if you do complain.

sashh · 02/02/2022 12:23

Ask them if they have heard of the Equality act? Then ask them how they implementing the PSED quoting;

The public sector equality duty ( PSED ) requires public bodies to have due regard to the need to eliminate discrimination, advance equality of opportunity and foster good relations between different people when carrying out their activities.

Telling you to use partner when you are married is discriminating against married people, and it indirectly discriminates against those you are not married as they now how no way to identify their partner who is not a wife or husband.

Also point out that it is perfectly possible to be married but to have a partner as well.

EarthSight · 02/02/2022 12:33

@Grade8piano

Hi there,

We’ve received a newsletter from school, highlighting LGBT month and exhorting us to not presume pronouns, and use they/them instead. Telling us to use the word partner and not husband / wife.

It goes on to tell us all about cisgender, (including how to pronounce it!), and that we can use the word queer to describe people, and on and on.

Should I say something or just let it lie?

I would be tempted to remove my child over this. They are massively overstepping boundaries and are behaving more like a church rather than an education centre.

YetAnotherSpartacus · 02/02/2022 12:42

I loathe being referred to as 'wife'. Similarly, I find it offensive when people refer to my OH as my 'husband'.

I am not married by choice because I see marriage as an offensive, oppressive, patriarchal institution.

He is my optional accessory partner.

If someone is married I'll follow their lead and use the 'married' terminology though.

I'd just prefer it wasn't the default norm.

Feelingoktoday · 02/02/2022 12:45

My sons school has the flag flying this week. 51 weeks of the year there is no flag!

CatSpeakForDummies · 02/02/2022 12:50

I don't understand why (using virtue signalling logic) we should say partner - same-sex couples can say husband or wife as well, so it isn't exclusive. Are they trying to say all relationships are equally valid, married or not? Do we avoid girlfriend and boyfriend?

I think that presuming pronouns would mean you didn't offend people 99% of the time, but assuming you can call people Queer is likely to have a much higher offence rate - how bizarre.

I would write back and say that one person does not get to unilaterally decide what is and what isn't offensive. If they claim this is a majority view, can they prove that there are a lot of married people who find it offensive to be called a husband or wife? It would be fairly easy to prove that a lot of same-sex attracted people find Queer offensive.

Thirtytimesround · 02/02/2022 12:51

Make a complaint in writing, to the head, to the Governors, and to the Department of Education (who you can email directly, you don’t need school consent). They are taking a political position and demanding that parents do so too. They are not complying with the legal obligation to respect gender critical beliefs, which is protected as a matter of law. Speak to Safe Schools Alliance and, depending on age/friendships etc, consider moving your DC. I wouldn’t be happy for mine to be educated by a brainwashing thought-policing institution.

When women don’t push back, they get walked all over.

AnneLovesGilbert · 02/02/2022 12:55

@Thirtytimesround

Make a complaint in writing, to the head, to the Governors, and to the Department of Education (who you can email directly, you don’t need school consent). They are taking a political position and demanding that parents do so too. They are not complying with the legal obligation to respect gender critical beliefs, which is protected as a matter of law. Speak to Safe Schools Alliance and, depending on age/friendships etc, consider moving your DC. I wouldn’t be happy for mine to be educated by a brainwashing thought-policing institution.

When women don’t push back, they get walked all over.

All of this, well put.

SignOnTheWindow · 02/02/2022 12:56

@ArabellaScott actually, I'm not sure I really know what queer theory is based on.
Can't seem to do a search within the Feminism topics on the app - does anyone have links to a thread explaining issues with QT?

Georgeskitchen · 02/02/2022 12:59

I remember back in the days when calling someone queer would be deemed offensive and insulting
I can't get my head round why it has suddenly become acceptable.
Could anyone enlighten me?

Waitwhat23 · 02/02/2022 13:00

Does the School do similar newsletters for the 8 other protected characteristics? Is there a letter for International Women's Day? Black History Month? Disability History Month? The major events of various religions? International Day of Older Persons? Etc etc.

I'm guessing not. There seems to be a myopic, single minded focus on this particular issue. It smacks of what is almost certainly lobbying by certain interest groups.

Original poster

Grade8piano · 02/02/2022 13:02

Thank you, I will be complaining. And considering whether this school is the right one. I’m so pissed off with this. It’s a girls’ school as well. What are they thinking?

OP posts:

Goatsaregreat · 02/02/2022 13:23

Here you are OP. Safe Schools Alliance has lots of resources for parents needing to challenge this gaslighting of children by schools:

safeschoolsallianceuk.net/resources-2/letter-templates/