Help me explain why it’s a problem

[Papierdecoupe]

I’m not up to speed with all the terminology and I’ve got Trans by Helen Joyce and Material Girls by Kathleen Stock on order. I’m on a mission to educate myself on what’s going on.

All I know is that teenagers/young children seem to be very preoccupied with gender identity and pronouns these days. It seems rare to find a teenager or young adult who says they’re heterosexual and the same gender identity as their sex.

I know my employer is pushing for pronouns to be stated on our name badges. I provide care to women and my employer is showing signs of adopting gender neutral language regarding this. Think ‘chest feeding’ kind of thing.

I know that some women have been ostracised for their beliefs surrounding sex and gender identity and safe spaces for women.

I feel so uncomfortable about all of this. My DH is sitting on the fence(ish) and says what’s happening is just the same as what happened with the increased visibility of lesbian/gay relationships in the 80s and 90s. Pushing boundaries and making people feel uncomfortable for their prejudices. He says the same happened for ethnic groups in the 50s and 60s - riots, challenging segregation, civil rights movements etc.

I wholeheartedly believe that trans people exist and it’s a real ‘thing’. I believe they need a space, respect and to feel safe. However, I am so uncomfortable that my children are now growing up to think that gender identity and sexual orientation are things to be decided and stated early on. I feel like I’m a bigot for saying that. I don’t know why I find it a problem and I don’t know how to explain it to DH. Can anyone help?

@Papierdecoupe

Thanks for the continued responses. I feel like I’m on a bit of a rollercoaster and go from thinking it’s not a big deal, to feeling really angry at the world. Those last few posts and just reading the phrase ‘individuals with a womb’ in a BBC news article have left me feeling pretty mad tonight.

DH is pretty convinced on the GC side of the argument now, but has concerns we’re in an echo chamber of sorts and he’d like to really hear some trans voices on the issue. His brother is gay, young, fiery and very woke and I think he’s also worried about what he’d think (not that they should ever need to talk about it, they don’t see each other much).

One problem you will find is that there are very few coherent voices on the trans side. My journey was effectively -

TWAW, be nice
Oh, here are some gender critical arguments that make sense
I wonder where the counter arguments are
I'll find them
They must be here somewhere
Nope. Nothing. They have nothing but "TWAW, be nice, #nodebate" plus a load of entitlement, misogyny, homophobia, nonsense. The GC side must be right

Look at some Magdalene Berns vids. The Riley ones maybe. Try to find the voices of what might be described as old school post op transsexuals. Many have more in common with people on this board than they do the current stonewall-approved orthodoxy.