Milli Hill and female physiology

[BoredOfCbeebies]

Please give some support to Milli on Facebook, on her Positive Birth Movement page. She's written a very sensible article about how we should use the word female when describing the physiology of those who give birth, and there's a bit of a pile on about how she's a terf, and turning into Katie Hopkins!
www.facebook.com/positivebirthmovement/

Gosh it is stressful putting some comments on Facebook where I’m clearly identifiable! But I have :) She is getting such a huge pile on. It sucks.

Oh god, what a shitshow in the comments. It makes me despair for humanity that other women are this blind to what is happening.

It is so beyond ludicrous that anyone is seriously suggesting that talking about "female physiology" in reference to birth is a problem, that I think I'm close to exploding with incredulity. How have we ended up here? What the hell is going on? It is bonkers.

How many transmen have given birth? Are there stats on this?

@Lessthanaballpark

How many transmen have given birth? Are there stats on this?

In the UK? One that I've heard of, Freddie who went to court to be called 'father' and lost.

Comments about Milli not being OK anymore are really patronising. Equivalents of the words female and women, for women, have been the right words to use since language developed, it's crazy to jump on new words to suit a minority.

@Lessthanaballpark

How many transmen have given birth? Are there stats on this?

I've heard two (UK) being mentioned on these boards before- as @spindlewhorl said, Freddie McConnell, and one other unnamed transman.

There may be a higher number of non binary people who have given birth but I can't imagine it's a particularly high number .

But yet, all the language used around pregnancy and female experiences is being changed. While men's language stays the same. Strange that.

all the language used around pregnancy and female experiences is being changed. While men's language stays the same. Strange that.

Especially as Freddie lost the court case, @Waitwhat23.

Very bloody strange indeed.

Whoa! That thread is vicious! I've added my support, though I hovered over the post button for a moment or two. I don't even have anything to lose but its still nerve wracking doing these things 'publicly'.

I'm not on Facebook but I'll ask DP to support her tomorrow. Just off to look at her Twitter etc.

@Lessthanaballpark

How many transmen have given birth? Are there stats on this?

It’s also all the non binary queer Im not a woman EUUWW how dare you suggest that crowd.

The posts saying erm nope are abundant as well

I was interested to see that making sure the um. What was it. Birthing partners of the birthing people were a key thing for some.

Making sure they were comfy relaxed had a drink etc etc.

Aka women looking after men even when their job is being a midwife fgs.

Good news for them!

DH hates hosps. And is not good in an emergency.

When it all went tits up after my induction. And I was not in Labour not dilated. Vomiting with every contraction my body didn't want to do but had been induced to. Indescribably awful. I was thinking I need to find a way to knock myself out it's so bad. And I'm no stranger to pain due to disability. I mean it was. Just. Unbearable.

Everyone who came in said to DH. You look very pale. Are you ok? Why don't you sit down. Would you like a cup of tea? Etc etc

Until they finally got a fucking doctor who looked at me looked at foetal heartbeat and was in operating theatre immediately.

So good news is the birthing persons birthing partners are looked after!

And the person who said. Why do you keep vomiting? I don't understand. You're not even in Labour. I've never seen anyone behave like this before. Was a midwife.

The real life thing is interesting.

In real life there are a vanishingly tiny number of people who don't want to be called women having babies.

For those people individual care is indicated not least due to potential issues re having baby but not women/ or Apparently female. I mean it must be a headfuck.

To suddenly alter the language that has been around for an enormous amount of time and replace it with terms that don't work..

Birthing person sounds like midwife
Labouring person is building a wall
Etc

It's nothing to do with stats or real life issues.

It's to do with reducing women and girls to reproductive function and naming us by our reproductive organs and processes.

The fact that women and...
Is no good.

And men are men not ejaculators.

It's just in your face misogyny with a dash of a old ideas about women and girls as chattel.

Words enter dictionary by common adoption in the population e.g. to google, catfish or gaslight.

But the words woman and female seem to be on the way out of the dictionary despite current abundant use with one specific meaning.

So it isn't a question of majority adoption. Word definitions rely on adoption by a specific demographic.

Sounds like outreach to young white males aged 16 - 20 in California is the only way to get the word woman to mean woman and for the word transwoman to be validating and fulfilling all by itself.

I hope I'm wrong...

I rarely go on Facebook.

However, I've been taking antenatal classes. They're run by a private company, not NHS or NCT. In the last written communication I received, I noticed that where they normally use the word 'mum', they had changed it to 'birthing parent'.

I'm due to give feedback on the course shortly, and I won't hold back, but it was very disappointing (and actually upsetting) to see this language used in the course literature.

Milli Hill is absolutely right to push back against this nonsense.

Thank you all. I couldn't believe some of the comments, saying that female described your brain or feelings. In which case, we have lost the word to describe a body with breasts, uterus, vagina, etc - it literally leaves us nameless, unable to describe our own bodies.

The comments are terrible. I follow her on Twitter and Instagram and she seems to get more support in these platforms. On Twitter, for example, there is one very positive comment compared to 219 on Facebook. I love Milli Hill and have got her period book for my 9 year old which I highly recommend.

I've read through the Facebook comments now and actually feel sick from them. Women being so vile and unsupportive of a woman who has dedicated her work to improving birth. I've messaged Milli to offer my support.

There are people on that thread saying being female is a state of mind and males can give birth.
They’re fucking lunatics.

It’s so strange because when my husband and I chose to try to conceive our children, we never discussed which one of us would become pregnant, spend ten months growing and carrying the babies and all the discomfort that entails, or which one of us would have to endure childbirth.
If I’d have known it was just a state of mind and I could have opted out and got my husband to do it, I would have.
I’ve been had!

What struck me, reading Milli’s article and then the comments, was how ubiquitous and insistent the demands are now. There’s no room at all for live and let live. If some people want to use this language, then best of luck to them. That would be fine if it was done in a proportionate way. I have no truck with people or companies who provide a separate page or area for those who are distressed. But those who wish to continue to centre women and use language accordingly should not be hounded continually to change.

It feels so depressing that we have to defend our use of the word “woman”. Apart it feeling almost dystopian, it is just plain sad to lose something that is so central to our personal experiences. And I can’t believe we are having it erased.

I refuse to use Facebook but if anyone is commenting it may be worth pointing out that the PROFESSIONAL organisations concerned with maternity care use the words WOMEN and MOTHER.
RCM, RCOG, NICE, MBRRACE

We are all lost when those organisations fall and I have my suspicions about the RCM but as yet this is the language used on all those organisations' websites.

They just like bullying individual women and are far too lazy to write meaningful letters to the organisations in charge.

Ooh dear. I'm not really up with YouTube influencers but am I right in thinking Zoella is one? Looks like she's had a baby and is promoting Milli's book....

I hope she doesn't have to spend her postnatal days fighting a pile on.

twitter.com/millihill/status/1432754107287281669?s=21

@libertine80

I've read through the Facebook comments now and actually feel sick from them. Women being so vile and unsupportive of a woman who has dedicated her work to improving birth. I've messaged Milli to offer my support.

Me too. Sick. Nasty knot of tension. I find it harder every day to tolerate TRA