Is #bekind unkind?

[vivariumvivariumsvivaria]

I've lost an hour on twitter looking at the debate around the IOC decisions in sport and how that impacts on female athletes. Laurel Hubbard is at the centre of these discussions, and the way Laurel is described is often quite far from hashtag-be-kind. I expect this is the cause of some stress for Laurel.

I'm thinking of the kids in my 14 year old's class - 3 female born children who are all either autistic or care experienced, who are causing a lot of drama in the school with demands to control other kid's speech. One of these kids was upset with my son because although he used the other kids' preferred pronouns and latest new name, the other kid didn't believe that my son believed they are actually a boy. And so my son was told off for not believing that a kid he has known since nursery has magically changed sex.

I think honesty is kind - it might be hard to hear, and it might cause distress which needs managed, but it is better than telling untruths. The worst scene scenario is that someone lands up being the poster-trans for the Olympics and at the centre of a frank and sometimes personal debate.

Laurel is now a story that is getting more attention than the effect of the pandemic on the Olympics. By saying "yes" to Laurel the IOC have created a horrible situation for Laurel.

When did we stop thinking that saying "no" can be protective? Are we, as a society, doing harm to people by agreeing to pretend that humans can change sex?

Maybe the upside of these TW competing in females sports will be increased interest , more viewers and thus more sponsorship into the sports.

Google's ngram viewer shows that "be kind" was high in the 1860s, then steadily dropped until about the 1990s. Its usage has really taken off since 2000. It is interesting to search for sayings containing the phrase. I wonder if there are any academic papers on the subject? It seems to have been promoted as a virtue above all others. "Be kind" has been weaponized and it now seems to mean be a doormat. We have seen it often as an admonishment on these boards, because it is particularly effective against women. I am glad to see the push back in this thread.

I was kind.

I won’t make that mistake again.

That's interesting, Turqouise - I didn't realise that is where be kind came from. Makes a lot of sense.

DS is mature and a good judge of character unlike his big brother

And, yes, I think if a 14 year old makes a plan of action that is reasonable you should listen to them, or at least not dismiss them out of hand.

There is a bit of me is itching to have a chat with the HT about transgender trend's stuff. I did send it to her yonks ago, and we have one uni sex toilet and the rest are sexed. Suspect she's GC.