Ultra-processed foods and the burden on women

[Shedbuilder]

I've had two conversations this weekend with people who saw a BBC documentary on the dangers of ultra-processed foods. Both of them are mothers, both say that as far as they can see, the only way to avoid UPFs is to cook everything from scratch. Both of them are very food-aware anyway but both also work full-time. They talked about how they're going to have to be even more organised than normal, invest in an extra freezer to take even more batch-cooked meals etc. The stress in the air was palpable.

I know some men cook for the family but isn't this yet another burden that's going to be loaded mainly onto women?

@Whatwouldscullydo you are clearly a better person than me. I invite a kid round, i throw my home cooked food in the bin after they've not eaten it but touched it a lot I stop bothering. I hate seeing it go in the bin. I hate the waste.

Without a SAHP there isn't time in the day. Women picked up out of the home paid work, but men didn't pick up a fair share of the SAHP stuff to compensate. Corporations have filled the gap with ready meals and more recently recipe boxes.

Instead of working hours going down with advances in automation etc., they have stayed the same, while wages have not kept pace with inflation.

It looks like the goal is for everyone to work "full time" aka have no time for cooking or even basic self care never mind good mental health, family quality time and physical wellbeing. Then we can be sold ready meals and medicines to mask symptoms of lifestyle diseases, of which I'm including depression as a uniquely Western invention.

@lazylinguist you'd be surprised. Basic McCain chips and probably stores' own chips that are potato and oil only are not UPF. Some tomato sauces (not ketchup) such a particular brands tomato and basil sauce are also not UPF.

I was just musing how things have changed. My mum never worried if tbe kid who knocked at the door would eat dinner they ate it or went without. Same applied to us if we went knocking on doors.

Different expectations I guess. We got in trouble if we made someone feel bad for the food they served. The one kid that came round when I was a kid and.moaned abjut the food never got invited back.

I'm not saying we whip children and make the. Grateful for every last crumb. But I do think again being the perfect host to every child ajd every person that walks through through door is a pressure we should stop putting on ourselves. It's again something that somehow we have ended up worrying about . When the reality is it's one meal , if they can't manage a few spoon fuss of plain.pasta they probably weren't hungry and the likely hood is they've already had sweets and god knows what befire dinner anyway

@Whatwouldscullydo

Sorry I'm.not school bashing befire anyone jumps on me. I just mean that their responsibilities have shifted to counter act what's being reflected in society now. Parents not necessarily having tine or money to parent due to work and responsibilities etc its now just a vicious cycle where no one can realky achieve anything. I bet the curriculum had a heavy make influence or people with zero responsibility to carry in life that we all do

I think it's a reasonable observation, a lot more supervision of school work at home is required now.

Part of the reason is that a lot of the school day is taken up with things that aren't very focused on either traditional school skills or content. (And I am not saying things like art or music, but things like school assemblies that push out literacy skills.) And many of the teaching methods aren't very effective. Integration of students with behaviour problems has also caused some real changes in the classroom. Lots of kids, even pretty quiet ones who are naturally good students, can't focus on their work in school because the classroom atmosphere is so chaotic and interrupted.

So it all gets pushed into after school time when, by rights, kids should be able to do other things.

I remember very vividly the first time I realised I could eat something I really disliked and keep quiet about it, I must have been about 7. I was invited for lunch at my best friend's house and they served canned tomato soup, which I detested. My mum never made it for me because she knew I really disliked it.

I knew better than to complain as a guest though, so I just ate it all. And amazingly, I found though I sill didn't enjoy it, it wasn't so horrible once I just accepted it all had to go down.

It was a bit of a lightbulb moment.

Of course this shouldn't all be women's burden
But think if it is going to get pushed on us then the key as people have said to lower standards/not give a fuck what people think
Cooking from scratch- baked spuds wiith cheese, omlette, pasta plus tomato sauce wiith frozen veg, lentil and veg soup with bread (get a breadmaker)- breakfast- porridge or eggs or toast and peanut butter- puddings - fruit or yoghurt most days.
school unform- clean shirts/pants/socks every day, spot clean jumpers/trousers/skirts
homework- read to the kids everyday, minimally supervise them in the kitchen while you cook tea up to age 9-10 then they do it alone

That we are even talking about it, even allowing it headspace?

What are you trying to stop? Death? Disease? You will die anyway. So will your children.

Just stop. Someone somewhere has decided this is the new stick to beat you with. Enjoy the time you have. Men do.

Men get all anal about cycling and protein

But eating non-UPF doesn't take any more time or effort if you just keep it simple.

It takes no longer to chop a potato into wedges and throw it on a tray with some olive oil and salt next to a chicken breast than it does to put chicken nuggets and chips on a tray. Then you just leave it to cook, right at the end microwave some peas for 3 minutes and you have an easy unprocessed healthy meal with very little effort or time.

Buy a big tray of pork loin steaks or chicken breast, break them up into portion sizes and put in ziplock bags with seasoning/ flavours like

• coriander and lime
• soy, ginger and lemongrass
• honey and mustard
• sun dried tomatoes, olive oil and basil

If you want to you can chop them into strips before putting into the bags, then freeze them.

The night before take them out to defrost in the fridge then they're ready for dinner the next day.

Either stir fry with noodles and veg or put them on a tray with potatoes/corn on the cob/ broccoli or cauliflower drizzled with chilli or garlic oil and roast for 30 minutes.

@PP2021

That we are even talking about it, even allowing it headspace?

What are you trying to stop? Death? Disease? You will die anyway. So will your children.

Just stop. Someone somewhere has decided this is the new stick to beat you with. Enjoy the time you have. Men do.

I saw the programme though, and it WAS horrifyng, if my kids were eating that sort of stuff, or I was myself, I'd be worried- the presenter ate this food for I think 4 weeks, he put on masses of weight, his brain got totally rewired (technical term) and his hormones which control appetite were fucked.
Of course we are all going to die, but that doesn't mean we don't want to live as healthily and as long as possible. And as parents we are making decisons on behalf of our kids that will affect them all their lives. So we have to take some responsibility. But it's not all on us as mothers. Fathers, and wider society also have to take responsibility.

It takes no longer to chop a potato into wedges and throw it on a tray with some olive oil and salt next to a chicken breast than it does to put chicken nuggets and chips on a tray.

Yes it does.

However I do agree with you broadly. We do a meat with seasoning, an easy veg, rice cooker, pasta or potato and done.

But that takes knowledge. My lot love chicken legs roasted with ras al hanout. Takes minutes. But my DD's friend's father who eats beige food and is suspicious of peas wouldn't know what that was if it hit him over the head.

Time, money or knowledge. You need one and it's generally women to have to acquire them.

But that’s my point I think. If i was eating unending crap I would think I would be limiting my lifespan. It isn’t rocket science. But dying is inevitable. And living to old age isn’t desirable for the majority, especially those who don’t have sustainable incomes in their elder years. They just don’t know it yet.

The point about sensible alternatives to upf is more valid in terms of being a productive adult. But costs are probably significantly higher for many families.

caroljadams.com/spom-the-book

For merchymor- Carol Adams draws on Mary daly in this book and works from a feminist perspective.

Again, explaining my own pov rather than saying everyone else has to do the same etc.

Men get all anal about cycling and protein

Until of course they have to sort or buy stuff themselves then a bag of doritos just fine.

Do you think the dads are worried that timmy amd Lisa are round today and might not eat the dinner?

Hell do you think it would even cross their mind til the.kids start hassling him for some dinner and then ut would he the emergency supernoodles

The parents at home would probably quite happily just make the kids sone peanut butter on toast if they are still hungry when they get home. It happens occasionally, its not like they travelled all day at great expense expense get there like a.wedding or funeral.

Truthfully there's probably only one.person actually worrying about whether or not anyone will tell the difference between bird's-eye and asda smart price nuggets and whether the kids will eat them .

And this is what we need to stop. There's enough to worry about without unnecessary pressure on ourselves to di everything all the time.

@HalfShrunkMoreToGo
It takes no longer to chop a potato into wedges and throw it on a tray with some olive oil and salt next to a chicken breast than it does to put chicken nuggets and chips on a tray.

Well, that's completely not true (and I chopped potatoes into wedges less than 4 hours ago). Tipping stuff out of a couple of bags onto a couple of trays takes far less time, and is far less messy, than making sure the potatoes are prepared (I had to cut off a few sproutings and dig out a spade mark today), cutting them into appropriate sized wedges, tossing them in oil, washing my hands before picking up the seasoning pots, sprinkling at the very least salt and quite possibly pepper and herbs, then doing that all over again with a slippery wobbly chicken breast or three (I don't bake chicken breasts so have no idea how one might prepare them) and then washing my hands thoroughly again.

And it takes longer to cook. Forty minutes leaves the wedges done but pretty anaemic, whereas the chips are edible after twenty and crisp after half an hour.

I think, respectfully, lets not get into 'chopping a spud takes the same amount of time' on a thread in feminism. The discussion is about where the labour goes, not whether the labour is too onerous.

Let's talk about food banks, where the type of food we are encouraged to donate is almost exclusively UHP in order to deliver the maximum amount of calories for the minimum amount of effort/fuel/equipment. I never bought a mugshot in my life for my house, but it's a tummy filling meal that needs a kettle.

This really does keep coming back to capitalism, doesn't it? The rich eat fresh, the poor eat shit AND we feel good about chucking it into the donation basket...

food banks are not supposed to be providing a permanent diet, they are emergency provision

lets not get into 'chopping a spud takes the same amount of time' on a thread in feminism

It's part of a wider MN issue of 'it takes two minutes to...'. Followed by hoovering, laundry, dusting, cooking, all of which takes ages!

They talked about how they're going to have to be even more organised than normal, invest in an extra freezer to take even more batch-cooked meals etc. The stress in the air was palpable.

You've seen the TV programme and are better off knowing about processed food. You're better off. that's it. you don't have to rush into anything.
How is being stressed serving them? or their children?

Let it be easy.
Be kind to yourselves.
Don't rush out and buy a freezer.
Shift from thinking about the burden to thinking about the opportunity:

• If you can work from home, can you talk to your employer about WFH more?
• If you have a partner, can you say you want them to cook more?
• Take your time. Can you experiment, research? There are loads quick meals from fresh ingredients.
• Introduce 1 different meal a week at a time.
• no need to rush

food banks are not supposed to be providing a permanent diet, they are emergency provision

It took just 4 weeks to re wire the brain though. That short term emergency provision could just be the beginning of a lifetime addiction courtesy of our saviours. The manufacturers of instant low effort to cook zero effort to eat food.

Personally I'd rather look the system that allows for 2 parents to work yet still be unable to afford to live and provide the basics of a decent meal to their family. All whike having to be grateful for whatever crap gets thrown their way.

@SuperLoudPoppingAction

caroljadams.com/spom-the-book

For merchymor- Carol Adams draws on Mary daly in this book and works from a feminist perspective.

Again, explaining my own pov rather than saying everyone else has to do the same etc.

So is being vegan even more feminist as one is not appropriating mother's milk by killing off babies and hooking up the mother cows to machines...?

And if you haven't got time, don't do anything yet. Stressed parents could be worse than processed food. Rushing to change your whole life is not necessary. Just be glad you know. Things will work out. Ideas will come. and gradually over time changes will happen subconsciously. It's ok.

@HoldontoOneMoreDay

I think, respectfully, lets not get into 'chopping a spud takes the same amount of time' on a thread in feminism. The discussion is about where the labour goes, not whether the labour is too onerous.

Let's talk about food banks, where the type of food we are encouraged to donate is almost exclusively UHP in order to deliver the maximum amount of calories for the minimum amount of effort/fuel/equipment. I never bought a mugshot in my life for my house, but it's a tummy filling meal that needs a kettle.

This really does keep coming back to capitalism, doesn't it? The rich eat fresh, the poor eat shit AND we feel good about chucking it into the donation basket...

Thats not the only reason though, its logistics. Our food bank isn't open everyday, and often donations are left in the box at the supermarket and gets collected again about twice a week; anything fresh or that requires a freezer or fridge just wouldn't be logistically viable. I'm not saying that's acceptable, and we are fortunate to have fruit and veg boxes made up for families once a week from monetary donations and the local greengrocer, but appreciate that's not usual.

I don't know, I feel like yes it's substantially more likely than women shoulder the burden that they feel they must for the sake of the family, whilst men aren't overly bothered. But I do think that the food industry is big business, they don't care about us, I do think it's important to open people's eyes. It's only the last few decades that UPFs have skyrocketed, no one knows the long term effects of them on the human body yet scarily.

My DH and I have a similar disagreement/conversation.
He is ‘bothered’ about the children’s diet. I cook from scratch 3/4 times a week. Other staples is pizza, fish fingers and shop bought carbonara. This is not good enough.

I tell him if he wants it to be different he needs to plan and cook dinners....tumbleweed.

I just ignore his judgment because it’s not backed up with any action.