I just need to vent and I get more characters here than on Twitter. 
I am so pleased for Keira. I am so pleased that it appears as though we are finally seeing the start of the end of this shit. It has been a long long time coming- much longer for many than me. I will be forever grateful to people like Stephanie Davies-Arai and Michelle Moore and Dr David Bell and Dr Marcus Evans and Sue Evans and above all Keira Bell (I know I am missing names here) for standing up while they faced endless abuse. I am so pleased that surely we will now start to see a change in not only the healthcare provided to gender distressed children and adolescents, but also in the wider affirmation approach adopted by many schools.
However, I am furious. I am incandescent at what our daughter’s school has put (and continues to put) us through as a family. They have utterly failed her. They have utterly failed my husband, my son and me. They affirmed her behind our backs. They told our (then) 17 year old son who was completely unaware and then had the burden of telling us.
A school should have the parents’ backs in situations as sensitive as this. They should not tell parents they have no say in the matter. They should not mislead parents into thinking they were not affirming while merrily doing so behind their backs. They should not blindly follow the whims of a lobby group, seemingly valuing the prestige of a pretty award over the well being and protection of a child - for these are children. They are not mini adults. They need our protection.
When schools blindly affirm and hide it from parents, they intentionally create division. They intentionally promote parental alienation. They strip us of all of our rights as parents. They assume parental responsibility themselves. However, when it goes wrong (e.g. decline in mental health), the responsibility is dumped back on us. Full responsibility without the ability to actually parent.
I love my daughter. I love her more than I can express and what the school has done is unforgivable. They have effectively locked in a house and we are the only ones trying to leave a window open for her. They have no concept of safe guarding. They have no concept of child protection. I sat in a meeting with the Head and Deputy Head where they seemed utterly baffled by why I was upset with their approach. This has had a great impact on my son as well and they appeared genuinely confused as to why it would (he had once asked for purple stickers for an LGBT event so I suppose they thought, why would he be negatively affected. After all, he asked for stickers!).
And while I am pleased beyond belief that I think there will be changes, I am desperately worried about the impact this will have on my daughter. It is a politically explosive issue, particularly here in Scotland. She has been turned into a little political football by the school and I am worried about the fall out.
This was entirely within their control- I have spent a year sending them information on the wider issue, on TransegenderTrends guide for schools, pointing them in the direction of “gold standard” therapists (even offering to pay for a session so they could hear about best practice). All of this was ignored. This was entirely preventable and yet it happened.
And continues to happen to far too many families like myself. My child and my family are being replicated up and down the country. We all have the same story and while I am so happy I believe change is on its way, I am furious that it has come to this. How did we let this happen?