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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Caitlin Moran - a bit more interesting than usual today

112 replies

ErrolTheDragon · 04/07/2020 18:24

Usually her Saturday times columns are quite fluffy, but ... well, I guess judging by what she's written the real Caitlin is emerging.

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/caitlin-moran-me-drugs-and-the-perimenopause-mpzn2cdh2?shareToken=733c91e33db6941fbd7927e96de18904

OP posts:
Silentfrog · 05/07/2020 19:50

@bishopgiggles yes, I had that a few times, when breastfeeding but also occasionally after sex. I have never understood it or been able to put it into words.

Silentfrog · 05/07/2020 19:54

Omg I just googled it and came up with 'post coital dysphoria'.

bishopgiggles · 05/07/2020 20:08

I got all my D-MER info from here

d-mer.org/

Yeah I don't understand why we get yet another shitty thing on top of childbirth and everything that goes with it!

Alonelonelyloner · 05/07/2020 20:12

@bishopgiggles yes! I had this with all of mine for the first few weeks. It was a black wave of despair that would wash over me when babies first latched on. I even asked my midwife about it once as it was so hard and she said she'd never heard of anyone being sad when feeding babies.

LightenUpSummer · 05/07/2020 20:14

That link says it’s caused by dopamine dropping too much, described as ‘inappropriately’ to allow the letdown reflex. Why it can happen inappropriately isn’t clear

bishopgiggles · 05/07/2020 20:59

she said she'd never heard of anyone being sad when feeding babies.

GOD this sentence just made me sooo angry Angry

(not at you!)

I definitely noticed it as something separate from 'baby blues' with my first baby, but didn't realise it was an actual thing until my second.

NeurotrashWarrior · 05/07/2020 21:26

Not me bish but OMG the rollercoaster when I didn't feed my then 3 year old for 4 days when he went on hol and I had to work (badly timed bookings!)

In my lll group that's been mentioned a lot.

I've recently been through a hypothyroid blip and I did begin to get terrible physical pms. Strangely I get quite low just after my period at the mo.

I have some friends who's pms is so bad they take Prozac just for the 2 weeks before.

I've personally found magnesium to be amazing.

I definitely used to have the post coital thing.

Ifonlyus · 05/07/2020 21:37

This is all so fascinating. Its important we to understand how we can all be so different due to hormones. I wouldn't know of people didn't share in forums like this. Either you think something is wrong with you if you think you're different from everyone else, or else think that everyone has the same things happen to them.

I've read about PND being the 'wrong' extreme hormones being switched on. I had a health visitor tell me that giving birth (or having a miscarriages) was like all our hormones being thrown up in the air and not knowing quite what cars you were going to be dealt. I was a very different - better? - version of myself when pregnant and breastfeeding. I'd have taken in orphan babies and nurtured them 24/7, when in reality, once I was past the infant years, I went back to being someone who doesn't really like being around other people's small children. I think CM is very wrong to write about the perimenopause as though it's a one size fits all, and also to insinuate female hormones make all women kind. Vit feels like it gives men a freecpass to be angry and unkind. In reality, many women haven't spent their ferrule years bathed in the placid hormones - in yet have still managed not to go around being violent.

My criticism of CM, was to assume she were saying women's hormones stop them being

Ifonlyus · 05/07/2020 21:39

Sorry - all kinds of typos. I should stop using my swiftkey and type words out properly.

ContessaferJones · 05/07/2020 21:41

God, I've just realised I might have had D-MER Confused I had never heard of it until now. I thought I felt like that because of guilt, because I was so shit at breastfeeding and never managed to do much of it.

bishopgiggles · 05/07/2020 21:51

Contessa yes, me too (although it did finally work out for me). I really struggled both times, found it really painful and had all sorts of problems. It took a while to even put my finger on it - think once it stopped being painful I was still 'bracing' myself for something else when I began?

Another thing no-one told me about - nipple shields! Turned everything around with dc2, made life so much easier.

HelloDulling · 05/07/2020 21:53

@ARoombaOfOnesOwn

The Times would stand by her if she went GC which does make it annoying that she doesn’t. But I guess the books and films bit of her career would be trickier.
They might, but she would be absolutely crucified online and also in person. Rape threats, deaths threats, the lot. As would her husband, and her daughters. I wouldn’t put myself through that.
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