Another family annihilator strikes *warning distressing details*

[Clymene]

Brisbane car fire: Ex-rugby player and three children die in 'horrific' incident https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-australia-48778156

What kind of man sets fire to his children? In the DM, he is described as a loving father.

And Katarina Carroll, Queensland's police commissioner, has been Tring to do damage limitation, including taking the lead detective off the case. For those who don't know Australia well, Qld is kind of Australia's 'deep south' culturally. It appears there was plenty of direct police involvement with domestic violence in the preceding months and Baxter had snatched the eldest child from her mother in the street and fled interstate. Police found and rescued the child after for days. There was stalking and electronic surveillance after (before?) the separation and Baxter had a DVO to stay 20m from his wife, for all the good that did. And people still ask why women don't just up and leave violent men, as if it's as simple as walking away. This is why.

But yeah, a big dollop of victim blaming balances everything. Makes violent men feel justified, feel better about themselves.

Yeah and I don’t understand how anyone can defend this man.

Violent men “ snap “ all the time. Every time the woman does something he doesn’t want her to do

It’s not snapping it’s violence and it never stops it keeps going and going
Escalating

The linked thread is just awful. I had to stop reading, not much fazes me anymore but it was actually quite triggering - and I don't use that word lightly.

Seriously people it's not hard. Women are allowed to be outraged, we're not the baddies here. And may I remind people that Hannah's experience as a DV victim is far from unique, she's not an other woman, she's just like us. Many many other DV survivors are right here on this site, churning at the apologism and whataboutism.

I'm sorry Aaliyah, Laianah and Trey. I'm so so sorry Hannah, that in your last moments your worst nightmares came true. How horrific to not be able to protect your babies.

What this man did is off the scale wicked.

The causes of violence are complex, we all know that. There's evidence that most UK prisoners have some sort of addiction issue, lots of them (both male and female) will have had violent/dysfunctional upbringings, lots have undiagnosed learning difficulties and/or ADH so didn't do well at school and have struggled to get jobs, no stable family life, genetic influences might be at play in psychopathy, a great many have had head injuries which can cause brain damage - etc etc etc.

But putting all of that to one side, the fact remains that men are far more likely to be violent than women and almost all family annihilators, terrorists, serial killers are male. Who knows if it's the testosterone or the socialisation or just the knowledge that they can overpower physically weaker people like women, children, the elderly? No idea what we can do about it, but it should be a priority for governments. Not holding my breath on that one, though.

That officer is horrifying and needs to go. His boss is gaslighting us. It was not bad phrasing. It was bad misogyny.

To say there were “two sides” and that people were “weighing up” which side to take!? WTF!?

That attitude is the whole problem!!

Queensland is not “culturally the Deep South” sadly, police say similar sickening things wherever in Australia it happens (see Karen Ristevski, Eurydice Dixon, Kim Hunt - one woman every week)

DM today is totally different.

Headline is about the abusive background of the man who "burnt his family to death" and the piece is about how he massacred them.

There's also a smaller piece just under it (on the online version) that says the cop who made the "open minds" comment has been suspended.

Maybe they do listen after all.

2BthatUnnoticed, you're right, I should have said Australia is culturally the deep south; and Queensland is Texas!

I grew up to adulthood in one of those states so I speak from long personal experience. I love Australia dearly and go back often but it does have an even bigger problem around attitudes and responses to male violence than even the UK. Anyone who doubts this can easily look at the stats.