However I do think it's very important not to fall back on 'I don't see colour' types of thinking.
I think this is tricky, and as a way of thinking it's acquired an undeservedly bad reputation. You are right of course that if you take this very literally it means you can't see certain important patterns. I do think that for the most part, when people say things like this, what they mean is that they see colour (ethnicity, etc) as really irrelevant in certain important ways.
But taking it from a more analytic POV, there are plenty of serious thinkers and academics, including many who are POC, who say that race exists fundamentally to allow racism, and that as long as there is race, there will be racism. If that is true, then the long term goal has to be to invalidate, and ultimately lose, the whole category or idea of race, so that in fact people really will not see it. I think we can have some sense of what that might look like if we think about other instances where an idea like that has been lost. In my part of the world, there is no longer any real sense of separate European races, where it used to be quite strong especially with regard to certain ethnicities. People may know that someone comes from that background, but it's not a division with any ontological or social meaning.
I think this was the kind of vision many regular people had in even the recent past about how we could end racism, and people had an intuitive sense that while we might not be able to forget about race yet it was still something that we didn't want to make more important than it already was. The rise of identity politics seems to have changed that significantly, it's become one of the non-PC ways to think, people are reprimanded for doing so. Instead of challenging the idea of race, identity politics actually solidifies it.
I personally think that's the wrong approach, but what I find particularly disturbing about it is the way anyone who believes that is being presented by the progressives. For the most part it's simply not admitted that anyone who is a POC might possibly think that way. If it's pointed out that actually it's not that uncommon, and you give some examples, the answer is that we can't reprimand them since they are POC, but certainly any white person who thinks that way is a racist. The suppression of argument is very worrying to me, the acceptability of it being based on your race is worrying to me, the use of the word racist in a way that seems designed to make people immune to the accusation is worrying to me. And it seems all to be tied up with something in the identity politics way of thinking.