Found this in a lesbian facebook forum

[chillz]

www.allure.com/story/guide-to-sex-with-trans-women-for-cis-women?fbclid=IwAR3ODpZ-vQMtwrH3uWwhry_GqAT-CUyYben322Yc7Ds__EOk5WfImtw_sTg

most trans lesbian sex for me has consisted of mostly foreplay, there's hardly ever penetration

This reminds me of when men ask lesbians 'what we actually do for sex' and laugh as they see that as foreplay.

It betrays a very male-centric and heteronormative view of sex, which seems rather inappropriate in an article supposedly written for lesbians!

There is tonnes of this shit everywhere.
Autostraddle has a vomit inducing article telling lesbians how to give blowies.
Straight males must have their every whim catered for, lesbians just have to play along

God I have actually read it now.

"That’s why I’m here today: to help you unlearn our society’s nasty transphobia and teach you how to have fun with the trans women in your love life. It’s a noble endeavor, I know. So let’s chat about trans women, how our bodies work, what feels good for us, and what you should know before we go home together."

Fuck right off then go fuck off some more. Unbelievable homophobia.
Seriously, give me a straight man over these creeps anyday.

Yah.

What seems to be lacking here is the concept of a natural and mutual attraction between two people. Or that lesbians may actually really only want to be with other lesbian or bi natal females - due to their wiring.

Lesbians aren't sexually naive women who need educating on how to satisy someone with a natal male penis. The whole world endorses men, and approves only of women in context to men. Most lesbians have tried to go with that model, but it is not a natural chain reaction attraction.

Bless. Thanks to mumsnet for providing some respect for our boundaries. We are someone's daughter also.

There is literally no respect for us.
Just self-entitled males disrespecting women and our boundaries.
Just like men have always done.

Aspley

Right on. If I was going to go straight, after so many unhappy attempts - it would have been with the best looking and nicest lad in yorkshire (who looked like a hunkier young Elvis Presley), or my very kind fiance of one year, or the other stream of gallant and decent blokes who knocked at my door.

However, yorkshire elvis and several other amazing guys didn't stop my path as a happy lesbian (and this was back in the 80s when being a dyke was a social curse).

I feel the need to patrol the lgbtq scene now, to stop young lesbians heading down a path of experiencing a life of no love and no respect

And another thing!

I had a fiance (male) when I was younger. We tried to make a go of it. I couldn't have asked for a better man. But we both knee by my sexual and romantic response to him that I was a lesbian. He loved me so much he took ne to a lesbian club. I decided then that I wouldn't keep him in a loveless marriage - for my social validation. He would have done that for me because he loved me. I respected him too much. He deserved better, and so did I.

So we let each other go

And no-matter how difficult my social validation has been as a lesbian, I would never steal a man's right to happiness with another woman.

That is the difference between me and some of the TLA's and their supporters. I as a lesbian, am expected to sacrifice my potential for happiness in order to satisfy someone elses sexual and social needs.

What kind of hatchet job is that?

Has this particular phrase ever been aimed at heterosexual men?

Keep an open mind, and remember you’re having sex with a woman who knows more about her body than you do about hers.

how our bodies work, what feels good for us,
Any thought been put into how your prospective partners’ bodies work and what feels good for them? No. Thought not.

Me. Me. Me. Me. MEN.

That jumped out for me also Magnetic.

The narcissism is genuinely quite staggering.

I think it’s interesting that the focus is so heavily on trans people with dicks, very little is mentioned in the way of post op trans, which would have perhaps been more useful to whomever they’re aiming this crap at. There’s probably very little on the Internet about that. On the other hand, we’re saturated with tales on how to pleasure penised people.

Do TWs who get bottom surgery (I know it’s a small %) tend to be attracted to men perhaps?

Can anyone find articles written in this style aimed at men having sex with trans women? In face after googling - in any style.

Or men having sex with women.

Or men having sex with trans men.

There are millions of articles on how to please your man all aimed at women. There are many on how to discover your own body aimed at women. There seems to be a dearth of instruction aimed at men on how to have good sex with women.

I’ve found one written by a stated by the author cis gay man on having sex with trans men.

www.advocate.com/sexy-beast/2018/8/08/16-things-i-learned-having-sex-trans-men

Interesting part about the author wanting his hole to be described as a pussy or cunt when he is in a submissive headspace. Rather telling that.

An article explaining corrective rape, is that the correct term for this?

Just be kind, just try harder, just erase all of your personal boundaries and do as you are told...

Sorry i didn't get past

"most trans women don’t even know how to pleasure themselves."

😂😂😂

Yeah right.

“This is not to say that using one's penis for penetrative sex is masculine." I'm fucking speechless.

There are so many things wrong with this but I am curious, is that level of detail normal/common in this type of thing? I have never really read magazines (I mean the ones that I imagine would be aimed at me - heterosexual 31 year old woman, maybe cosmopolitan or maybe I'm too old for that), but are comparable articles similarly graphic? I wouldn't be surprised to hear that they are, but I've never read anything like this before.

Also this stood out to me:

“It's rather simple to say, but genitals are blessed with being the arbiter of sex and gender, within the context of a patriarchy that is rooted in biological understandings of people,” Blanchard says. “So I think a cis girl needs to know that how she talks about a trans girl's ding-dong could be more upsetting than if a cis guy were to say the same thing.”

The first sentence does not make it clear to me at all why it would be more upsetting for a "cis girl" to say stuff than a "cis guy".

'Trans women with vaginas have genitals that function similarly to cis women’s, whereas trans women’s penises on HRT are much more analogous to an enormous version of a cis woman’s clitoris.'

I'M SO ENORMOUSLY WOMANLY THAT I'M EITHER EXACTLY LIKE YOU OR ENORMOUSLY MORE WOMANLY THAN YOU.

Name the functions of a vagina that a neovagina can also do, apart from 'receive a digit or cock'.

This is so insane.

The paragraph alone got me and we hadnt even got to the sapphire trans sex yet! "Higher temperatures are encouraging us all to be slutty, so whether you’re single,nonmonogamous, poly, or something in between, it’s the perfect time to swap numbers and grab drinks with that dyke that you’ve been bashfully checking out at the feminist bookstore"

I always think these articles have an almost peadpophilic tone to them? It's similar to anime in a way, it's the use of words like bashful and girl and dumbing down of sex like they're speaking to a child? They proper give me the creeps

Also why do they call their dick a clit? They say it like they invented the word clit, here's a revolutionary name for my female dick! It's not a fucking clit

Obviously, it doesn't mean that a girl who isn't on hormones or has an unchanged dick is less of a woman.

That's because anyone who has or ever has had a dick is not and never will be a woman, BUT with no hormone replacement or surgery they are not even trying ffs

I think its a great article as who could possibly read that and think ooh sounds great I'll give it a go!

Jellylegsni
That stood out for me too.
“So I think a cis girl needs to know that how she talks about a trans girl's ding-dong could be more upsetting than if a cis guy were to say the same thing.”
Women and girls are trained to be submissive and soft and we definitely shouldn't be a cunty type of women, (read T**f) no man likes that type, especially trans women and the bearded woke bros. So just be nice now and be pleasant. And don't say mean things.

I read that, and thought, why would I care? Whether you are male, female, straight, gay, or a fucking unicorn - if I'm in a relationship with you we will work out together what we both like to do together, otherwise stop effing banging on about sex and your body and what YOU WANT. I couldn't give a flying fuck. Why do they think their sexual peferences are so bloody interesting, and so much more important than anyone elses? Do they not have any other hobbies?

I really can't imagine why I, a gay man, never get told, by Vogue or Vice or the like, or Attitude or Gay Times or anyone else, how to have sex with a trans man.

Nor is it ever explained how a gay bottom has sex with a trans man.

Maybe the assumption is that as a gay man I don't want vagina in my sex life. I just don't know how that dr-r-r-eadful transphobic sentiment works its way into the magazines i read.

But lesbians have to be bombarded with endless lectures on how to have sex with trans women in every fucking magazine in the land.

It's almost as if trans women are stuffed to the gills with male entitlement, even more so than most gay men or even straight men.

Just to say, it is transwoman, not trans woman.
Words and their meanings are important.
Transwomen are male, not a type of woman.

Man who identifies as transgender.