Ha, no need to be dry. The post office things was bizarre, for sure.
As far as teens, I would not assume, as a reader, that someone who says children in some places and teens in another only means those who are under age, as I have encountered people before who use the term "children" very broadly. Some of the queer theorists were talking about teens as well, particularly around the idea of gay male teens, and I found myself unsure whether everyone was talking about the same age group or not.