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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Famous women challenge

77 replies

Billy02 · 13/04/2019 23:16

Hi, my dd has challenged me to find a famous Actress, Instrumentalist, Dancer, Singer, Singing Diva (has to be on the stage) who has stayed on top of her game post dc?

She is sure there is nobody and it's her argument for not having kids, she's only a teen and realistically could change her mind.

I know it's nothing to do with me but I want to inform properly, it will be up to her and her biological clock when she is older.
I have been a sahm for 30 years and have absolutely no regrets at all, but I was never going to be world class at anything, and had free choice.

So to try and get a good balance and because when we have discussions she can still talk me into a bloody corner, would love to hear any suggestions.
No presenters or tv celeb judges btw, they are all great but a different category.

OP posts:
Mner2019 · 13/04/2019 23:51

Pink

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 13/04/2019 23:51

Nicola Horlicks

CaptSkippy · 13/04/2019 23:52

OP do you live in this world? The vast majority of women who become mothers have had to sacrifice at least a little in terms of career or are simply not given the same oppotunities as men or women without children. Clearly a career is important to your daughter and having children is not or less so.

This is her decision and I think it's wise of her to consider the effects of having children might have on her career and whether or not that is worth it.

It is not fair and it shouldn't be this way, but that's the way it is.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 13/04/2019 23:54

Clara Furse. I worked in the same world as her back in the day and she was a bit of a force. Several kids.

LassOfFyvie · 13/04/2019 23:55

Anna Netrebko - mother of 1. Tickets for her recent performances in The Royal Opera's The Force of Destiny were going for £2-£3,000 on the secondary re-sale market.

BoomBoomsCousin · 13/04/2019 23:58

Angelina Jolie.
There are plenty of examples. But probably more examples of women who were stymied by the burdens of motherhood - they just don’t get named in the papers much. I think she’s right that if she wants that sort of career she’s more likely to succeed without children than with.

LassOfFyvie · 14/04/2019 00:01

I still don't get why you are looking for extraordinary women rather than ordinary women who are mothers and have careers.

gillyginger · 14/04/2019 00:03

Sue Townsend

LassOfFyvie · 14/04/2019 00:10

And obviously JK Rowling

AndNoneForGretchenWieners · 14/04/2019 00:19

Olivia Colman

LassOfFyvie · 14/04/2019 00:31

Just beat me to Olivia Colman. She has 2 children. She was very obviously pregnant in The Night Manager.

LassOfFyvie · 14/04/2019 00:33

Rachel Weisz

LassOfFyvie · 14/04/2019 00:36

Keeley Hawes, Laura Fraser and Anna Friel

LassOfFyvie · 14/04/2019 00:39

Marin Alsop

Original poster
Billy02 · 14/04/2019 00:57

captSkippy

I don't care what she decides as long as she is happy. I'd like her to see some middle ground, she isn't normal and everything is black and white to her. All part of her charms.

OP posts:
Original poster
Billy02 · 14/04/2019 00:58

Marin Alsop, aw one of her idols. Thanks
I guess I never pay attention to people who have kids, how do you all know?

OP posts:
AlwaysComingHome · 14/04/2019 00:59

Gillian Anderson did a season of The X-Files while pregnant, skipped a few episodes, then carried on afterwards. Done plenty of stuff since then on both sides of the Atlantic.

VickyEadie · 14/04/2019 00:59

Emma Thompson. Sarah Lancashire. Judi French. Maggie Smith.

VickyEadie · 14/04/2019 01:00

Dench, not French, bloody autocorrect!

LassOfFyvie · 14/04/2019 01:07

Dench, not French although you could have Dawn French.

SenecaFalls · 14/04/2019 01:14

I think it is such an odd perception for her to have because there are so many. And this thread illustrates that many reached their peak after having children.

Maybe at this point she just does not want to have children and is just looking for reasons to justify a choice that needs no justification.

HarryHarry · 14/04/2019 01:19

Don’t know if someone has already said it but Scarlett J is the highest grossing actress in Hollywood, after having a child.

nutsfornutella · 14/04/2019 01:28

I think that ageism is a bigger barrier to women in the public eye than kids. If you look at the list of top paid actors/actresses then then men are much older than the women. There's lots of mums in Hollywood (Reese Witherspoon, Kristen Bell, Mila Kunis, Julia Roberts, Cate Blanchett...) but they "disappear" earlier than Dads because of a lack of roles.

LassOfFyvie · 14/04/2019 02:24

believe me this is discussion and one I think we should have with our children

Well, I'm not clear what the discussion even is.

I don't however think whether or not our children should have children is a discussion to be had by anyone other than our children and the putative other parent.

I have been a sahm for 30 years and have absolutely no regrets at all, but I was never going to be world class at anything

Very few of us are going to be world class at anything but that's really not a valid reason for the choice being having a career or not having a career.

nonobono · 14/04/2019 08:31

I think it's definitely fair enough to point out to your DC that a woman's career does not have to end if she has children. It seems that's the impression she was under. If my kid had (what was in my opinion) the wrong idea about anything I would tell them my point of view with examples to back up.
That's entirely different from pushing her to have children.
Yes women with children have to work incredibly hard to stay at the top of their career, but that's probably what they were doing anyway if they were a performer. However making decisions such as not ever having children to improve your career is not always easy, especially for those who think they might actually have loved being a mum, or if their career does not turn out to be as successful as they thought.
Tough decisions, that should be made by the woman herself, when she is one, but should be informed decisions, so I think you are right to point out that it is possible if that's what she wants.

Hopefully things will be better for our children it that respect. But performing careers will probably involve lots of touring and leaving children or taking them with you and all that entails for the child.