Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Update: identifying as non-binary for work award

999 replies

Somerville1234 · 03/04/2019 02:02

Can't find the old thread... but anyway, there's an award/opportunity at work, only for people who are LGBT+++. I don't remember all the categories but they included genderqueer, genderfluid and genderfree. Also K, which I'm reliably informed stands for kink lifestyle. I don't understand why someone would need a special thing at work for getting off on weeing and whips (?? I don't watch porn, I don't have a clue), but maybe I'm just old fashioned. Anyway, old fashioned or not, I'm gender free because I don't believe in gender. And I wanted the professional opportunity. (Forgive me for the vagueness - being careful because of doxxing.) And you lot were encouraging...

I ended up applying - which didn't involve saying how I met the criteria, just ticking that I did. And then I was perpexedly approached by my woke boss.
(WB "Erm... so you realise that this is for LGBT+++ employees, Somer?"
S "Yes."
WB "Erm...it was my understanding you're a straight woman...?"
S "I'm genderfree and-"
WB: "Really?"
S "Yes, and I think I need to remind you that the staff handbook recommends that no-one should assume anybody elses's gender."
WB: "Oh, terribly sorry about that.")

I then had a lovely meeting with HR where they were very keen to update my pronouns on the system. I told them that being gender free I require the box beside gender to be left empty, but that I can accept female pronouns because that's my biological sex. They were happy with this novel idea Smile and to learn more about the difference between sex and gender. They young HR person didn't know they're not synonyms but he learns something new every day apparently.

And now... I've heard I'm shortlisted for the next round!
It's been announced to the whole company, and I've had a few bemused looks but no direct transphobia, I'm happy to report. Smile
My longsuffering DH (works in same field) has been teased a bit for my gender identity but he's happy to suffer for the sake of my fight for equality. Smile

OP posts:
Thread gallery
22
welshgendercrit · 12/04/2019 21:49

I created a new Gmail account and they asked for my gender. Since I am gender free, I did not tick the boxes provided but ticked "other" and manually entered genderfree. I feel so liberated now!

Way to go, Lamaha. Grin

pombear · 12/04/2019 21:57

And so Sally can wait, she knows it's too late as we're walking on by
Her soul slides away, but don't look back in anger I heard you say

I've skipped a bit of the thread but I can see what so many are saying.

Outsiders to this thread who've popped in to see what this is about, and may think this is a prank, or an attempt to 'erase' trans and non binary identities.

So many people right now aren't listening to women. About how lots of women feel. About why women see the opportunity in 'Genderfree' in giving them the abiliity to define themselves, within the new 'world order' of labels'.

No one ever really seem to want to listen to women. Unless it's in defiintition to what men want.

So many of us are shouting out here, and elsewhere, to say 'listen to us, hear our stories of how 'gender' oppresses us

Why can't you hear us? Are you stuck in glass boxes, looking out on so many women calling to you. Telling you how it really is, in real life?

Gutting, but not surprising.

To other women, we're all here waiting for you. To catch you once you realise that the current zeitgeist is for men.

We're here. And we're not going anywhere.

Lamaha · 12/04/2019 22:16

Again I miss the "like" option on MN.

BlueSkiesLies · 12/04/2019 22:38

This thread is amazing, you amazing people.

Applesandpears23 · 12/04/2019 22:42

Well done! I hope to be brave enough to do this one day.

Fallingirl · 12/04/2019 23:51

Fantastic post, pombearStar

sertralinesex · 12/04/2019 23:58

WineWineWine

To Pombear
Yes! Exactly

vivariumvivariumsvivaria · 13/04/2019 00:04

pom No one ever really seem to want to listen to women

Not since Boadicca. She got some attention.

ALittleBitofVitriol · 13/04/2019 00:59

You know it's a good thread when there's oasis lyrics.
nostalgia intensifies

UnWilly · 13/04/2019 01:08

Underground, Overground,
Our Gender is Free.
The Women of Mumsnet,
Female are We

Challenging stereotypes that we find
Things that the AWA folks leave behind

Unfair Conditioning, we can hope for the days
When stereotypes don't define
Male and Females of the world
Rip up expectations and make them Gender Free

Women are organised, the equality team
Women are principled and our motives are clean

Underground, Overground,
Our Gender is Free.
The Women of Mumsnet,
Female are We

People don't notice us, they never see
Under their noses our Gender is Free

Challenge by night and we challenge by day
Looking for stereotypes to trundle away

We're so incredibly utterly resourceful
Making the most of everything
our determination will win

Pick up the pieces and preserve the things that are true
Is what we do

Underground, Overground,
Our Gender is Free.
The Women of Mumsnet,
Female are We

Challenging stereotypes that we find
Things that the AWA folks leave behind

(Excellent work OP!)

(And a link to what this is a poor parody of for MNetters considerably younger than me!
The Wombling Song g.co/kgs/xVsEiU )

EluphNaugeMeop · 13/04/2019 05:46

I love that Underground Overground song @UnWilly! Well done.

EweSurname · 13/04/2019 07:48

I love that Sally Hines is getting involved!

This was a great response - if anyone has any more examples of articles/posts of women saying the same thing (other than the last however many years of the MN FWR history Grin) then it might be helpful for other people to see how this isn't a joke but has been the GC stance all along!

twitter.com/glosswitch/status/1116816463820656641

Victoria Smith
@glosswitch
Replying to @sally_hines @Shelducks8 @mrleeward
Gosh, it's almost like all the women you spend your life patronising have been several light years ahead of you all along! How could you have known, tho?

www.theguardian.com/society/2017/sep/16/drop-gender-stereotypes-we-are-all-non-binary

reallyanotherone · 13/04/2019 07:50

apparently one of the speakers has said that Jesus was non-binary because he had long hair and wore a 'dress'? Or because he was nurturing and kind?!

Anyone told muslim and sikh men they’re non- binary yet? Plus arab and african countries where culturally men wear dress like garments.

To be non binary there must be a set of rules to define binary.

MIdgebabe · 13/04/2019 08:08

WEll there are unwritten rules, that are culture dependent. If you break them your life will be harder. More people will shun you. PEOple will try to put you back in a box.

FloralBunting · 13/04/2019 08:48

apparently one of the speakers has said that Jesus was non-binary

Jesus is God. (Christian perspective here, obv.) Is the next step up from Lang's sacred caste for them to actually claim they're Gods?

(As ever, my jest is ridiculous in my eyes, but I am never surprised now by what utterly nonsensical directions they go in...)

KatvonHostileExtremist · 13/04/2019 09:28

Diary of a Proff of Bantz and Feelz

Diary entry (Friday 10 am)
Oh my God. Like. Seriously. Those wicked not nice at all TE*FS (#burnthem) have been at it AGAIN. They are actually claiming to be "genderfree". But they ain't got the Feelz knowledge I've got. Have they? There (sic) not PROFESSORS. I know they've just made that right up to win awards from brave and stunning people. Taking all the awards. They'll (sic) be none left. How can they not FEEL there (sic) totally evilness?
I've totally owned them on Twitter.

Diary or is it dairy entry (Friday noon)
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Stupid (not professors) t*rf scum TOTALLY FELL FOR MY JOKE. Honestly people. I totally knew you have been saying this for years about gender. But you are so non professory that you forgot my academic qualification in BANTZ as well as FEELZ. I totally knew all the Feelz stuff, just wanted to be hilarious, again. Ha. Hope you FEEL stupid. Gettit?

Diary entry Friday 2:30
Their (sic) honestly dumb. Dumb. Dumb dee dumb. IT was RESEARCH. Special research. That's what I do. I research things using twitter. Twitter the best. I've researched they (sic) before.

Honestly diary I really do think I've been here before.

----------------

You have! Sal! You have! We remember....
It's almost becoming a pattern

  1. Tweet something daft, get owned
  2. Claim it's all a joke
  3. Say you're researching

It's not really a good look.

Update: identifying as non-binary for work award
Update: identifying as non-binary for work award
Update: identifying as non-binary for work award
LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 13/04/2019 09:40

Say your sibling took your phone and tweeted crap on your account? It’s all akin to ‘The dog ate my homework’.

Ereshkigal · 13/04/2019 09:47

Kat, it's uncanny... Grin

BeansandRice · 13/04/2019 09:48

I’m a professor. I teach feminism. I wish I could engage with Prof Hines in my real name and in a medium actually suited to complex philosophical and political analysis and discussion. But the accusations of transphobia threaten my job, livelihood and ability to House, feed and clothe myself.

Such is the position of feminism in Britain in 2019.

Trousering · 13/04/2019 10:14

The likelihood of a professor being sacked because of accusations of tranaphobia is zero.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 13/04/2019 10:15

But the chances of being heckled, followed, having your door pissed on and the kiddies setting up campaigns to have to banned is 100%

ErrolTheDragon · 13/04/2019 10:21

And then there's funding...

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 13/04/2019 10:38

And idiots turning up lectures then making a noisy protest and flouncing out whilst squealing ‘TWAW! Stop the hate! Isn’t that right Delores de Fleur?’

drspouse · 13/04/2019 10:51

Life can be made very unpleasant though as Rosa Freedman has seen.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 13/04/2019 11:08

Bullies, that’s all. With no consequences (until they get out into the real world and potential employers check out their social media footprint).