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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I have had enough now so this is what I have done. A lurker speaks!

49 replies

nottakingthisanymore · 07/10/2018 17:51

Hello all. I was a member for years - left because of geoff, waited over a year and just read but not registered. I then reached peak trans. I rejoined. There was another data breach so I left again. Still continued to read and get angry. There is a limit to what I can do but I have just lost it this weekend with my anger. Green party calling the police was probably the last straw.
Anyway - I have finally done something. Because of reasons we are all aware of I have to be cautious. Firstly I contacted my mum. Explained it and she's horrified. She has filled in the consultation. Took the very brave step of messaging my sister about it. Poured it all out in a message to her and expected her to ignore me. She didn't and she has filled out the consultation. Her husband has too. She is the last person on the planet who would ever do anything like this. So then I approached MIL. She got it after I directed her to fair play for women. FIL is filling it in too.She has filled in the consultation. I have now approached one work colleague who seems on side but has yet to do the consultation. I think she will though and her husband to. Obviously DH has done it. My point is that I have managed to get 6 people to fill in the consultation and have got a potential two more to do it. I know it's not much but if all of us who haven't been brave enough before did this then perhaps it will help.

I go from fired up confidence to beating this to actually sobbing in despair when I think about the future. I can not be as eloquent as the ladies on here and I probably won't ever put my point across as well as them but I just wanted to say that people ARE reading this board and ARE doing stuff. I truly believe the support for us is there. When I approached my sister and MIL they got it straight away. Most people agree with us they just don't know what is going on right under their nose.
Sorry this is rambling. I am going to do more. I am going to email my MP tonight. And next time there is a meeting near me I am going to go. Oh and just as an extra point. The very first thing I did was to like on facebook fairplay for women and women's place. My thinking was that this would show up on my friends news feeds and might make them click the link. I see it as sort of indirectly saying - i support this. I thought if things got ugly I could basically say that I had just liked it and I would check it out a bit more. I did this several weeks ago. No negative comeback yet and actually saw one of my friends has also liked fair play for women - so it's just a thought for those of you thinking about trying to go public as it were.

no males. no lies. no compromise.

OP posts:
LikeDust · 07/10/2018 17:55

Wow!

That is amazing.

seafret · 07/10/2018 18:22

Courage calls to courage! Star thank you :)

I do think many women are just waiting for someone to take the lead, or show what they have no idea about.. and it was you OP!!! Outstanding

pennydrew · 07/10/2018 18:23

This is great. And yes, quietly campaigning in your own way does work. Awareness is important, I’ve yet to talk to anyone who isn’t against self ID.

VickyEadie · 07/10/2018 18:25

Good work!

BestBeforeYesterday · 07/10/2018 18:28

Sorry to be obtuse, but what consultation are you referring to?
You've done a great job campaigning btw!

MangoSplit · 07/10/2018 18:29

Well done OP!

I have just been sent a link to the consultation by a friend who I had no idea was GC saying "sorry for the mass email". I was so chuffed!

I'm also going to write to my MP (I've found he tends to ignore emails but respond to written letters).

As you say, if we can all just do something small....

gendercritter · 07/10/2018 18:50

Amazing! Well done. Everyone stepping up and doing something helps, however small.

FlowerpotFairyHouse · 07/10/2018 18:56

Well done.

I've been trying to talk to my brother and sol for months and they just completely ignore me.

They think I'm a hysterical woman who is making this all up and believing all sorts of nonsense I've read online.

Not because they believe TWAW but because they don't believe any of this is happening because it's not being discussed on the BBC.

Deliriumoftheendless · 07/10/2018 19:39

I’ve been leaving FPFW leaflets where people will see them (toilets, buses etc) and I raised it with a friend today. She recognised the opportunity for abuse straight away.

Women have experienced too much to just be ok with self id. We know it will be exploited and we know we won’t be listened to when it is.

I’ve filled in the consultation and have a leaflet in my window.

I think it’s too little too late tbh but I have a young daughter. This is for her.

Mumfun · 07/10/2018 19:46

Total respect. I've been peak transed too and doing what I can at the moment!

pombear · 07/10/2018 19:47

I truly think there are so many ways that people can play a powerful part in this right now.

The brave women and men going public and loud need actions from otherwise - otherwise it's just words they're shouting into the void. Whatever we can do, we're backing them up. And it's actions by you that mean so much.

You've done incredible stuff. You've had conversations. Motivated others to take action. It's just as important as having a public voice.

Everyone's actions dovetail together - whether it's wearing a shirt, handing out a leaflet, having a conversation, emailing your MP.

Every single action.

You've done something amazing.

Nottakingthisanymore This is grass-roots at its most incredible. You're part of it. Any one who takes any step, big or small, is part of it.

pombear · 07/10/2018 19:50

*others gah!

Redkeyboard · 07/10/2018 19:51

That is amazing and inspiring.

BestBeforeYesterday · 07/10/2018 20:06

Thanks Mango!

Lokisglowstickofdestiny · 07/10/2018 20:33

Thanks OP, your post reminded me to complete the consultation - that's now done. Keep up the good work. I have managed to ensure that my DH and DD (who was previously very pro self ID) see the issues for what they really are.

Howcansanepeoplesaynothing · 07/10/2018 20:41

I filled in the consultation last night. My husband couldn’t believe the shanigans of Jacinta. As others have asked, where is the BBC’s reporting where TW go rogue? Their silence is contemptible.

UpstartCrow · 07/10/2018 20:41

nottakingthisanymore Star

I posted the Fair Play jaypeg on my real life social media account and some very unexpected people have liked it.
I think part of that is because there is currently an election scandal in the US, where people have been taken off the electoral register without their knowledge.

I have had enough now so this is what I have done. A lurker speaks!
crunchermuncher · 07/10/2018 21:35

Wine that is awesome!

I'm so down about it all because my RL feminist 'besties' are pro trans rights and don't see any problem with self ID. These are people I've had many an intelligent discussion with over the years and I knew when the (man's) world was getting us down we had each other's backs. I feel so lost in all of this that I seem to have lost that camaraderie. It's encouraging to see that doesn't seem to be most people's experience.

A few family members were shocked by it and totally on board with my concerns so I'll be brave and try and get them to complete the consultation too.

Thanks for spurring us all on!

derikthesheep · 08/10/2018 00:01

Well you can count another person that you pushed to get on with it. I finally filled it in! That's for the link mangosplit and the kick up the bum nottaking!

WanderinWomb · 08/10/2018 00:53

I'm impressed *not taking it anymore.

Well done

stealthsquirrelnutkin · 08/10/2018 01:03

Hurrah. Thanks nottakingthis you've really cheered me up!

MelonBuffet · 08/10/2018 01:16

Brilliant well done!

I was spurred into action by a FB post from a friend who was incredulous that this was happening and we hadn’t been told. She had stumbled across it and was livid. She has a son, but was worried for her nieces.

Having been doxxed for being in the ManFriday group I had previously changed my FB settings/URL/name etc to try and throw them off the scent.

Just knowing I wasn’t the only one has emboldened me and I’ve now posted a few links and articles. Not getting much feedback (except likes from the original friend!) but at least I’m not scared anymore.

If anyone thinks I’m a bigot the truth will out. Sadly I fear that some women and girls will be harmed before it is seen for the madness it is, but it will be seen.

Thank you to all of you who have put your heads above the parapet, giving others the confidence to do the same. Flowers

Coyoacan · 08/10/2018 04:26

I think you are very eloquent, OP. I wish I had your powers of persuasion. I'm not in the UK, but this is so important in so many ways, though my main concern is still the safeguarding of children from unnecessary medical treatment.

Fillipe · 08/10/2018 04:37

Same here as crunchermuncher Thank-you so much OP, I will start afresh today. Brew