FactsAreNotMean
Actually on that note, I'll have a go at addressing Yrevas "quite transphobic" too.
Aspie, so prone to occasional bluntness disclaimer!!
In many ways I'm the exact opposite of transphobic; I HATE gender stereotypes and the way both women and men are pushed towards certain behaviours, styles, attitudes, behaviours, careers etc on the basis of their sex. I work in a traditionally male dominated industry whilst running a side business in a traditionally female one; I see how damaging and limiting gender roles are. So if someone wants to step outside them I genuinely couldn't give a rats ass. Guy who wants to dress in a stereotypically feminine fashion? Rock on mate, I'll happily chat makeup with you. I think gender rules should be broken as fast as possible.
BUT
I don't believe that conformity with gender stereotypes or roles defines man and woman. I believe they are biological terms. We sometimes segregate on the basis of them, and we need to be able to define them clearly. How can you identify an issue which impacts woman (such as gendered violence, discrimination in the workplace, etc) if you can't clearly define what a woman is? And vice versa for men.
Historically (and I'm not even talking very long ago), the only trans people who most of us were really aware of were your stereotypical old school "transsexual" - people who ardently believed that they had been born in the wrong body, who were largely seeking surgery to allow them to fit in with who they believed themselves to be, and who were by and large a fairly sympathetic group who just wanted to live in peace. I think most people (and certainly most women) treated (and continue to treat) this group with sympathy and kindness
That is no longer what the term "trans" means though, it has become far wider than that. To avoid any accusations of bias, here is what Stonewall describe as trans:
"An umbrella term to describe people whose gender is not the same as, or does not sit comfortably with, the sex they were assigned at birth.
Trans people may describe themselves using one or more of a wide variety of terms, including (but not limited to) transgender, transsexual, gender-queer (GQ), gender-fluid, non-binary, gender-variant, crossdresser, genderless, agender, nongender, third gender, two-spirit, bi-gender, trans man, trans woman,trans masculine, trans feminine and neutrois."
That's a pretty damned big umbrella, and only a tiny proportion are what many people think of when they think of a trans person.
The current trans lobby are pushing for everyone in these groups to be able to be recognised as the gender/sex they identify with, on a basis of self identification only. They want self identification to afford access to sex segregated spaces - so a part time cross dresser would, under their approach, be able to use female changing rooms, refuges, prisons and so on.
That's dangerous to women in particular if all any man has to say is "I identify as a woman".
But looping back to the Mermaids issue - they are one of the many organisations (but perhaps one of the most dangerous) who are strongly pushing an agenda where someone who fails to conform to the stereotypes attached to their birth sex should be considered trans. They advocate taking the word of young children who say they like stuff associated with the opposite gender, treating it as gospel, and setting them off on a path towards hormones and major surgery - and doing so unquestioningly and as quickly as possible. They use utterly debunked suicide stats to frighten parents in to transing their children when statistical evidence shows that, left alone, the majority of children will desist as they mature and go through puberty.
I'm not OK with that.
As has been discussed upthread, children who are autistic (possibly undiagnosed in many cases) can be particularly vulnerable to this as they often don't comply with gender stereotypes - in the same way as they often don't comply with many social rules.
I'm not ok with that either.
The push to say that someone who doesn't fit in their gender box actually belongs in a different box - rather than saying that the box is bollocks - damages women who have been fighting to break free from damaging gender roles for centuries.
Nope, not ok by me.
Do I hate trans people? No.
Do I believe people should have equal human rights regardless of their identity? Of course - healthcare, housing, etc etc etc.
Do I feel sympathy for people experiencing dysphoria that makes them so unhappy they want to permanently change their bodies? Absolutely.
Do I fear the current trans agenda, the way it's being pushed on us, and the impact on women and children
Yes, I very much do.
But in the current climate, having concerns apparently makes me transphobic, or a bigot, or a terf
I know this was many pages ago. But I feel it’s written perfectly and is exactly why trans ideology is fucked up. Why are we being told that if we don’t fit into one box then we need to change to fit into another. It’s crazy, anyone who thinks like that is an idiot in my opinion. The box is wrong not peoples bodies.