I don't know if RedToothbrush has been suspended for six weeks, has taken a break or something else.
I'm 100% still here. No ban or suspension or anything else. Just taking a bit of a twitter / MN break over the summer for my sanity.
In terms of 'breaking the cult' I think no it doesn't work. People who are that involved aren't going to listen. They have already made up their minds. Changing someone's mind is a difficult thing to do. The stronger the opinion the harder it is to get through. Its not just about the opinion but how that opinion sits with your identity and sense of pride.
But if its an open letter, its not just directed at being read by a single individual. Whilst its about an individual, its supposed to be read by lots of people.
The silent reader who does have an opinion which is much less rigid and fixed. And those are people you can influence.
Whether thats 'fair' is another matter. There is a certain amount of passive aggressiveness in writing about someone who you know has said they are not interested in the conversation and making it 'an open letter'. Open letters about people are possibly not good manners and aren't going to endeer you to a whole bunch of people - which might rather undermine the point you were trying to make in the first place.
So it does serve a purpose, but its not really intended to be only for the eyes of the friend whom its about and definitely has some problems in achieving its goal of being persuasive to people who are not already gender critical. It has the effect of being more likely to be preaching to the converted instead.
Changing someone's mind is a long process. The wisdom of this generally as follows:
- The mistake is to assume that people have opinions based on facts and logic rather than emotion.
- The more evidence you provide therefore doesn't necessarily mean it will change opinions; indeed it can often have the opposite effect and cause people to switch off, get their backs up or otherwise not want to engage.
- You need to get people on side and find common ground first. Agreeing with someone about certain shared values and goals is hugely important to establish a new direction of conversation.
- You then can reframe the issue from how it has been initially presented. Come in from a different angle. Put emphasis in a different way or an area of concern which you both share. If you do this you can have a different conversation and a different debate where views are not entrenched in the same way.
- Introducing alterative explanations or outcomes or solutions to the problem then becomes possible. Again this provides a way to reframe the debate and doesn't go over the same ground over and over again.
- This is all about trying to get people to 'think' again rather than just repeat the same things they have been taught. This is why you'll see a pattern in trying to return certain subjects to ground which is well trodden - like toilets. Give people the opportunity to repeat well known slogans, just means they remain in the same safe rut of a lack of thinking.
- Providing a way to save face or climb down without compromising themselves or their values is essential. 'Its not as simplistic as it appears on the surface' is a good starting point to this as well as stressing that you understand the thought process of being supportive of the trans agenda.
Rememberi