Child abuse by couple - treatment of woman in the case disturning

[Alternativefacts]

metro.co.uk/2018/08/10/girl-raped-at-least-16-times-by-her-own-dad-can-never-be-adopted-7824538/
This really upset me. Awful case, mother as well as father involved, but then you read that .....

The male also controlled his wife’s mental health medication and contact with doctors, cut her off from her family, and would not allow her to go shopping. The couple met in a pub in England when the woman was aged just 16 and within months she was pregnant. The court was told she had in effect been sexually groomed by her husband, who had spotted and exploited her vulnerabilities.
Robin Rouch, prosecuting, had previously told the court that the family did not socialise with neighbours, the daughter was home-schooled, the garden gate was kept padlocked, and curtains at the windows closed.
Judge Geraint Walters said the husband had ‘psychopathic tendencies’ and a ‘devious, wicked and flawed personality’ that combined with his wife’s flawed personality and vulnerabilities was the ‘chemistry’ that allowed the abuse of the little girl to happen.
The woman was the one to go to the police and tell them .

The sentences? Min 12 years for the man on a life sentence, 10 years sentences for the woman .

OP, I'm not quite sure if you're suggesting that this woman - who sexually assaulted her daughter - has been treated unfairly? I do hope not.
It's an absolutely terrible case but we must have a society where those who are parents protect their children and when people fail as awfully as this, then the state must punish them. To be honest, my only concern is with the child - no matter how vulnerable, this woman failed her child in every possible way.

So his sentence is actually given the fact there was no murder committed pretty much as harsh as it could be.

The min 12 years on a life sentence will mean parole will only be considered after 12 years (and considering this is the minimum term) and after that he will be on parole and under strict supervision even if he does come out (and he may well not) so I think he is about right

She is 10 years with extended for 1 - so eligible parole after 5 years and then on licence for 5+1 and is receiving psychiatric care

I always think in these cases though however vulnerable and controlled the woman was there is an element of their personalities that allow them to go along with the man, that most other women would not. Without him they would not have done so but with him they did (if that makes sense) and I think the Judge's comment on flawed personality reflects that. And for that I think the sentences are correct

Well said, womanspeaking

Have to say, I agree with Quartz.

The only disturbing thing about the treatment of this woman is that she wasn't given a longer sentence. Him as well.

Are you making excuses for her failure to protect her child?

I too agree with Quartz

I sincerely hope you’re not trying to say the woman wasn’t at fault OP and using feminism to do it. Because that’s pretty shitty.

oh my god, that poor girl. There are some twisted evil people out there. I hope both of those perpetrators suffer and I wish that girl peace in her life.

The woman is receiving psychiatric help. It may be that she is receptive to rehabilitation, and if so, hopefully she will receive that in prison.
The fact that she was victimised to some extent herself will have been taken into consideration during her sentencing, however it doesn't exonerate her from responsibility, or at least not in this case.

Oh no, just read the story (wish I hadn't). Both of them should have received life sentences. I hope the child is able to find some happiness in her life with someone who actually cares for her.

This is such a difficult case. Because yes, absolutely, the mother should serve her time and nothing can excuse what she did. But I can't help but feel compassion for the child she was, groomed, manipulated and pregnant at 16. Where were the people looking out for her - her parents, social services? How was she being medicated, but no concerns were raised for her or the child? Where were the inspectors that are supposed to look at home education? The health visitor? It sounds like an absolute catastrophic failure of safeguarding for both the mother when she was a child, and for the little girl.

if a woman is so easily manipulated to this extent that she will do this, then she still needs locking up for public safety. Everybody is a victim of their upbringing to some extent, male or female, but there does come a stage when it isnt an excuse, and abusing your own children is one of them. The authrities should have also protected the child.

She didn't go to the police until after the relationship was over.

She is receiving psychiatric treatment, rather than rotting in prison.

I would have liked to see them both get a lot longer. But yes, particularly him.

You haven’t articulated exactly what you find disturbing, OP. I think the sentences for both of them are far too short, if that’s what you mean, but sentences for rape and sexual assault generally are.

Both parents failed their daughter utterly, on every level, and it is her I reserve my sympathy for. The mother took part in the abuse as well as the father: she was hardly a by-stander.

Well fuck that’s grim as. I’m glad the perpetrators are locked up! What on Earth can be done for that little girl? What do they mean by unadoptable?? I get she must have complex psychological needs, but can’t we as a society do a bit better than shrug our shoulders?

I imagine from reading between the lines of them saying that she had been conditioned to see the abuse as normal, that she displays sexualised and potentially abusive behaviour to others

Similar situation with Louise Turpin (?). Who deserves what's coming to her.

I think women are responsible for their own choices regarding their children. She was clearly an accomplice to child abuse. Appalling that the OP is suggesting she's being punished too harshly.

OP do you want to clarify what you think is unfair? The woman being punished for the unforgivable horrific crime of sexually assaulting her small innocent child?

She was willing and able to contact the police when the relationship was over, she was able to do so at any point beforehand and likewise to decide she wasn’t going to assault her child and watch while she was raped by someone else.

Both adults are a danger to society and deserve to be locked up for as long as possible.

This is what I mean when I talk about female sexual abusers. I am not minimising the man in this story or suggesting that man get an unfair rap. I always say do not discount the women in these situations. Yes she was controlled by him. But that doesn’t relieve her of responsibility. Lots of predators operate using women as shields, and they know it. By accepting that women (mothers) can have guilt for sexual abuse it makes it harder for men to use them as shields. And it respects the victims who have been the victims of both parents.
The shock here is when a pregnant 16 year old wasn’t protected.

It does always seem to be the case that women rarely do this sort of thing without a man pulling the strings, which is the feminist angle I wonder if the OP means, but yknow, when youre talking about letting a man repeatedly rape your daughter and joining in, then theyre no better and deserve everything they get

Fred and Rosemary West both had appalling childhoods, and Fred admitted that he groomed Rose, and was able to do so because he met her at a young age. Does that mean that Rose doesn't deserve her life sentence for her part in their joint crimes? I don't think so. It has to stop somewhere.

Unfortunately as a society we still do not do enough early intervention to help vulnerable children, and this applies to both male and female children. However adults still have to be held responsible for their actions.

This thread is a good example of the dangers of seeing things from one "political"perspective. As others have commented, often women can be groomed, especially when young, and engage in abusive situations. But that's when individual responsibility and ethics is important and women have to step up and protect their child, no matter how difficult.

We are seeing this elsewhere. Rotherham, Rochdale and all the other cities where girls were abused and people stood by for fear of being politically incorrect. We have to find our moral courage to stand up and speak out when the unacceptable happens and not hide behind our allegiances.

We shouldn't hide behind our alliegances or our messed up past.

I'm as compassionate as any other decent woman for those who have been through appalling abuse. But having been through abuse myself, I know there comes a point when you have to step away from your conditioning and make choices which make life better for those around you, and yourself.

Doesn't mean we shouldn't do all we can to help and rescue those in abusive situations. But it does mean that a hard history doesn't excuse this kind of wickedness.

Homeschooling needs to be more closely supervised as well. This is the second case of severe abuse/neglect where the child has been homeschooled that I've heard of within a couple of weeks.

The woman has probably got the best outcome possible in the circumstances - a psychiatric placement instead of prison. She will likely need years of treatment and hopefully her sentence will give her what she needs.

Whereas the man has life with a minimum 12 year tariff. He still won't be let out at the end of that if he's still seen as a risk. Given he's in his 50s now, this more than likely is a life sentence.