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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

What does it feel like to be a woman?

84 replies

Secretsquirrelisfedup · 22/07/2018 22:43

I am not trying to be goady. I genuinely welcome all views.

I am a woman but I cannot tell you how it feels to be a woman because I am just me. I genuinely could not answer what being a woman feels like in general terms. I can only describe how both biological and socialogical aspects of being female from birth have influenced the way I feel, which differs for every woman I know.

I would not have been directly affected by these things had I not been born female so I have no idea what I would feel like if I wasn't. So what I want to know is what does it feel like to know you're a woman without the obvious signs?

OP posts:
itsbritneybiatch · 23/07/2018 02:08

But op

Get a grip babe

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 23/07/2018 02:12

I wanna go round itsbritneybiatch ‘s gaff she sounds like a larf😉
In reply to op, surely nobody thinks about what it like to be a man or a woman on a day to day basis?
Don’t we think (indeed if we do at all) about what it’s like to be ME!?

UglyCathKidstonBag · 23/07/2018 02:16

What’s happening? Confused

TinyRick · 23/07/2018 02:27

Fucked if I know

billsbillsbillsbills · 23/07/2018 02:37

Shot because you have to look a certain way. I'm flat chested with no curves and a bloated belly. Shit hair shit skin no ass no nails absolutely nothing good I can say about my self

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 23/07/2018 02:45

bills you sound a bit down on yourself

Original poster
Secretsquirrelisfedup · 23/07/2018 02:51

Not entirely sure whats going on. No this hasn't been deleted already because I have not said anything offensive to anybody and nor would I. I do not want to make anybody feel bad. What I am asking for is answers to questions that I have not yet seen actual answers for. @itsbritneybiatch can you actually answer my question or would you rather throw random shite accusations at me and label me as lots of things that I am definitely not in order to deflect from it?

OP posts:
LinoleumBlownapart · 23/07/2018 03:07

The only way I can think about what it's like to be a woman is to compare it to what it's like not being a man. And weighing the two up and knowing what I know now. Being a woman is shit, that's not to say I don't enjoy life, motherhood, being married etc, I do, but I certainly feel like we get the short straw.

thebewilderness · 23/07/2018 03:20

We all make the lemonade as sweet as we possibly can but that does not change the fact that lemons are what we started with.

Prawnofthepatriarchy · 23/07/2018 06:45

My female biology is what makes me a woman. I have been significantly disadvantaged by my sex, in real, tangible ways. The compensations have been having my two DC and sex.

Floorplan · 23/07/2018 06:52

Just to clarify, when I said it doesn't add up I was referring to the transgender position, not the transexual one. Having body dysphoria as a mental illness is something I'm sure we all have sympathy for.

The bit that didn't add up last night was how all of us women seemed to be identifying womanhood as, first, biological manifestations of our sexed bodies, and, secondly, as felt mysogeny (that's how it seemed to me).

In other words, feeling like a woman primarily feels like you have female reproductive organs (and their consequences).

It also feels like something which is not of your own making as a woman, but is the effect of others view of you and how they treat you. Therefore this boit is not intrinsic to being a woman (well not in an ideal world at any rate). This mysogeny bit is not so much how it feels to be a woman (that womanly essence that tras are so familiar with), but how it feels to be the victim of a lifetime of misogeny and it's consequences (which obviously differs in extremity for different women but we've all felt it).

So the reason it doesn't add up is that trans women never say this. Probably because they are not the same.

TerfsUp · 23/07/2018 07:10

iambritneysboss - wrong thread.

TerfsUp · 23/07/2018 07:11

I have no idea what it feels like to be a woman. No more than I know what it feels like to be female.

I just am.

Batteriesallgone · 23/07/2018 07:17

My first thought was period pain

Then labour

Pain is a feeling, and when I’m asked to define woman, that’s where my mind goes. To my reproductive organs and the pain that issues from them.

I don’t think men have any idea what that’s like - to live with a cycle of pain.

rosy71 · 23/07/2018 07:30

The things that make me feel like a woman are biological. E.g. periods, breastfeeding, pregnancy. Otherwise I'm just a person. Occasionally I am reminded I'm female by someone else's behaviour towards me. E.g. a sexist comment.

Kingkiller · 23/07/2018 07:44

It would still be really really helpful to hear from people who identify as women who don't share these experiences of being born female

I am a woman (because I am an adult human female). I don't really share those experiences, as I have been fortunate enough not to feel as though I've been belittled or preyed on, and have never experienced abuse or harrassment from a man, although I'm well aware that this is unusual.

I don't believe 'living as a woman' is a thing. My biology makes me a woman, as does the fact that I gave birth to children. I don't understand how anything a natal man could do would constitute 'living as a woman'. The only obvious thing would be dressing as one. And that is totally superficial and nothing rrally to do with living as a woman, sunce a womzn could wear 'male' clothes and still be a woman.

WomanInBoots · 23/07/2018 07:46

Biology, including (but not by any means exclusive to) the effect of female hormones. And socialization as a female.

Try as I may I cannot identify a feeling that feels like being a woman. Except those that are a consequence of the biology and socialisation.

SciFiFan2015 · 23/07/2018 08:12

I'm a woman. I don't know what it feels like to be a woman. I just feel like me.
There's no one way to be a woman so how can anyone know what that "feels" like?
Also if woman was a feeling then surely we'd all feel the same way and be able to articulate that?

Melamin · 23/07/2018 08:21

Walked on.

grasspigeons · 23/07/2018 08:24

I don't feel like a woman but being a woman has led to a feeling of fear I suppose. When I look at my feelings and DHs, we both do joy, hunger, love etc but the one that shapes my life more than his is fear. The big one was getting pregnant when I didnt want to, then when pregnant all the things that happen to my body, then when not getting pregnant all the side effects of contraception. After that it's the things like public transport esp after dark or not wanting to go to particular countries.

LangCleg · 23/07/2018 08:55

What does it feel like to have 10 fingers?

Exactly. There is no such thing as "feeling like a woman". There's being one, with 3.5 billion different combinations of feelings existing on the planet currently. And there's not being one.

LangCleg · 23/07/2018 08:56

More Britney, please! I like Britney.

LangCleg · 23/07/2018 08:57

It would still be really really helpful to hear from people who identify as women who don't share these experiences of being born female.

I don't think it would.

AngryAttackKittens · 23/07/2018 09:06

It feels like irritation at the fact that the be-penised half of the population just won't ever fucking leave you alone, mostly, ime.

BettyDuMonde · 23/07/2018 09:19

For me, feeling like a woman (as opposed to feeling like a girl, as those are the only two classifications I have experienced) is worrying that I am going to die young from women’s cancer, like my mum, and leave my children motherless, as I am.