There is no need whatsoever for feminists to use the word 'gender'. Just use sex roles. 'Sex roles' is crystal clear, whereas 'gender' is hopelessly confusing. (And since gender means sex roles, 'gender roles' is a tautology.)
I'm trying to explain this to DH and hitting a brick wall. He thinks they are the same.
Of course he does. As do most people. Because gender is used interchangeably with sex now, even often in scientific and medical discourse. I bet he would easily grasp the difference between sex and sex roles though.
I'm going to stop using the word 'gender' for a bit. I had a breakthrough when speaking to a couple of acquaintances... Two people peak-transed by removing the terms that people find so confusing. Result!
This whole rollback of women's rights under the guise of 'gender identity' depends on confusing terms. If both sides of the debate were forced to define terms, it wouldn't even be happening, because the 'gender identity' side would be unable to, as we have seen numerous times on this forum where 'TWAW' sloganeers have singularly failed to define 'woman' in any meaningful way when challenged.
The gender identity movement relies on nobody defining terms, and especially on the inherent confusion in the word 'gender', which is used interchangeably as a synonym for sex and sex roles. Thus, they can claim their regressive campaign to abolish the legal and ontological meaning of the former is a progressive program that will free us all from the latter.
Feminists should abandon the hopeless project of trying to explain the difference between sex and 'gender' to people. (There is no difference in common use, when even doctors will now refer to the 'gender' of their patients). And we must stop confusing people further by saying things like 'gender is a social construct'. Most will take that to mean that feminists agree with the bonkers claim that sex is socially constructed.
All feminists should stop using the weasel word 'gender', and instead refer only to sex and sex roles or sex stereotypes. And we must force others to clarify whether they mean 'sex' or 'sex roles' every time they use 'gender'. And watch how much clearer the debate becomes.