is being attracted to the same sex innate?

[nicholascageconfusedface]

I don't think it is. I think we are all born and have both biological and environmental influences that make us who we are. I do not think that any baby is born gay (prisoners, gay for the stay) I don't think there is anything wrong with being attracted to people with the same sex as you, as long as it is consensual, and of a legal and mental age for capacity of understanding. Be happy. I'm just your average straight woman with children. I wonder how gay/lesbian people disagree with me, but claim that transgenderism is not innate. To clarify, are we born gay/lesbian? if not, why not? and if you believe that nonsense, why do you disbelieve transgenderism? (I'm very gender critical, non religious, and in full support of 'gay/lesbian' rights' I'm interested to know peoples thoughts

human females are willing to have sex when they are unlikely to conceive, or when they are no longer fertile, shows that our reproductive systems have been utilized for other purposes

We have concealed ovulation unlike other primates (theoretically) because we're clever and could work out timings and therefore would separate pleasure, which we all seek, from life-threatening, expensive, painful and dangerous pregnancy. So we had to have concealed ovulation so we'd shag anyway and continue the species.

Other species don't have sex to produce offspring, they have sex because it feels good.

Could I ask the lesbians who have responded whether you find this thread homophobic please?

"Could I ask the lesbians who have responded whether you find this thread homophobic please?"
Nope (or I wouldn't have engaged in the conversation). Depends on context in my opinion, if I was continually asked whether or not my sexuality was innate, would be as annoying as the old-fashioned 'what do lesbians do in bed anyway' that I used to get when younger.

Why we're lucky lesbians, lots of dykes wonder at some point, and since this is a fairly civilized conversation that has broadened out into interesting areas, why would I consider it homophobic? Unless you're stuck in the belief that I just am gay, okay, and talking about why (or even asking) is homophobic............which it might be unless you started asking why straight people are straight as well. So, in that case it would be the context (asking one question repeatedly but never the other), rather than the question itself..................

I haven’t found this thread to be homophobic. I’d rather people be allowed to politely and nonjudgementally discuss these things rather than be afraid to speak.

OP, you sound like a huge homophobe.
I believe people are born gay and I believe some people are born with gender dysphoria.
Enjoy watching the rest of the series of OITNB.

Well, that may be the primary purpose...

Well yes, but as you said earlier, most things that humans do aren't strictly necessary - why eat food? we'd be much better off with carefully balanced protein drinks.

I suppose the complicating factor is that our success as a species is largely due to our brains which need stimulation, entertainment, love etc. etc.

Re: the religious right wingers - I wonder if any anthropologists have discovered societies that have died out because of boredom?

I wonder if any anthropologists have discovered societies that have died out because of boredom?

I'm reading a book about how different societies failed, and nothing yet on boredom, sorry. Maybe on the second half.

"I wonder if any anthropologists have discovered societies that have died out because of boredom?"
If that was the case, no one would get past the teenage years.............

Is that it? Once we became self-aware, we also developed the capacity to be bored? Is that the flip-side of curiosity? We developed fire, perhaps, because some bored teenage girl was hitting rocks with other rocks and set her bedroom on fire (hence discovering scented candles and incense at the same time as her dried-foliage bed with a bees nest in the corner went up as well....................).

Course, the problem with trying to study boredom:
www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/the-history-of-boredom-138176427/
is that as soon as you do, you cease being bored!

Thank you somedyke and hotrocker.

"I wonder if any anthropologists have discovered societies that have died out because of boredom?"
Not so much boredom as disinterest brought on by drink. Terrible tragedy for villages in the Aleutians that had rigidly enforced gender roles. Ships that traded rum for pelts would find a ghost town when they returned a few years later.

which it might be unless you started asking why straight people are straight as well. So, in that case it would be the context (asking one question repeatedly but never the other), rather than the question itself

YY to this

I don't think I had a sexuality as a baby. Freud would disagree with me. I don't think I was born bisexual but I certainly was born with those preferences when I got older.

I don't think people are choosing to be same sex attracted, which the OP implies. I feel a chemical, physical pull to certain people that doesn't feel to me to be a choice. I do choose to act on those attractions but to have them - no.

thank you for the responses. my opinion is be who you like, love who you like, as long as its consensual, people under 16 don't have capacity. ps lweji I'm your average straight woman with kids. do you think the average woman reads feminist boards and blogs? they are too busy working and looking after children. I think sometimes childless lesbians with a shitload of 'expertise' on woman hood, when they have not experienced what your average woman expects, needs to wind their neck in, put down the sociological THEORY and live, look at how people are living In real life, all parts of the country. put the bullshit gas lighting of females arrogant 'check me out, I have a degree, therefor anyone who does not, reads the daily mail and is a Nazi far fight moron" I'm not even right wing. It is stretching by a long shot, if peoples views don't fit into boxes of left and right, that should be a good thing, it means people are thinking for themselves....fucking finally. nowt against lesbians just drop the identity politics shit. its fucking divisive

yes there are spelling and grammar errors. I'm sorry to the anal people who are twitching right now, I wish you had stronger impulses, I believe in reincarnation though, maybe now is not your time peace

Current best scientific guess is that it has a very large genetic component. It seems to be prevalent across all cultures in similar ratios and also across a significant part of the animal kingdom. There’s also work done to say it has an indirect advantage- siblings of gay men tend to have greater reproductive success.

So normal, innate and with possible benefit, which is why it’s not died out as a mode.

What is our average woman with children? How do you define it? Why do you consider yourself average?

What's with that rant about lesbians? Odd. All other straight women on this thread don't seem to have a problem.

Why did you post this thread?

So to be clear: the OP says we should put down the sociological theory but we should also look at how people are living?

This is a question that you might expect to be philosophical but actually there is a correct answer.

The question of nature vs nurture is usually investigated by twin studies. How often are identical twins both gay or both straight? Compare that to how often non-identical twins are both gay/straight and that will give you an idea of how much genes alone influence sexual orientation.

Then you can compare non-identical twins to siblings and that will give you an idea of how much other pre-natal conditions such as hormones influence sexuality compared to upbringing. What's left is environmental influence.

If sexual orientation was 100% due to genetics or the pre-natal environment you would find that identical twins share the same sexual orientation about 100% of the time. They don't.

If it were 100% nurture you would find that identical twins separated at birth have the same orientation only as often as chance would dictate in the general population. That is also not true.

Through these twin studies the best guess we have is that your sexuality is about 40% determined by nature and 60% by nurture.
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18536986

That doesn't mean that 60% of gay and lesbian people aren't truly homosexual or have been brainwashed or anything. Genes interact with the environment in order to express themselves. You could have the best tanning genes possible but if you live underground you're not going to express that. Likewise certain conditions are genetically controlled but only triggered by certain environments.
So, no, homosexuality is not a social construct it does have a genetic basis but the expression of homosexuality is strongly influenced by the environment.

I've never understood the whole 'it's not a preference' thing. I am straight as they come but I definitely COULD fuck a woman, if i decided to. I could marry a woman and build a long and happy life together and fuck her every other day. I just wouldn't do that because i prefer men, the same way i prefer eating a delicious chocolate cake to eating cardboard. I CAN do the latter but it holds absolutely no appeal for me. My sexuality doesn't make me medically incapable of eating muff it just makes me prefer not to.

Did a lesbian once steal your ice cream cone when you were children, OP?

OMFG.

Well, that nasty piece of prejudice was pretty thinly veiled.

Of all the things to be mad about you’re mad about educated lesbians having opinions?!

And what on Earth has that even got to do with sexuality?

Really not clear why or how there would be any conflict of needs between ‘average women with children’ and ‘lesbian feminists’ or what that has to do with the OP’s posts.

Also, what is an average straight woman with kids?

From the OP
I'm interested to know peoples thoughts

Clearly not.

@Bloodmagic

That's a decent summary of the thread.

I was talking to my gay daughter - gay being her preference - about this and she said that she did have male crushes during her teens but decided she didn't like 'penis' as a form of sexual satisfaction.

Did a lesbian once steal your ice cream cone when you were children, OP?

Well of course. If only young lesbians would stop doing that, we could all get along