Universal credit & domestic abuse

[QuarksandLeptons]

Good article in the Financial Times

www.ft.com/content/aaaaf2fa-4c63-11e8-8a8e-22951a2d8493

Brief summary:
10% of the households receiving the benefit are couples. The new system puts it all into one account which means that in the event of it going into the account of a controlling & abusive partner, the abusive partners can end up not sharing the money, leaving women and children vulnerable. There are cases documented of women and children going hungry and not having money for nappies or sanitary items.
Worse, women & children end up being forced to stay in dangerous circumstances because they don’t have the money to leave.

How can changes like these be made to the system without thinking through the real life consequences to huge numbers of women & children? Surely, this would have been flagged up if relevant women’s groups had been asked to comment on proposed changes

Partner abuses you? You can't leave because the benefits system has become punitive and women's services have been decimated.

Partner abuses you? You can't leave because of the above and you can't call the police because they might bring in social services who could well take your kids off you because you didn't leave.

That double bind is classic psychological abuse and the weapon of psychopaths - damned if you do and damned if you don't. It causes cognitive dissonance along with all the other untold harm from being abused. And this is serious mind tampering stuff.

And then there is the rental system.

Women on housing benefits are routinely discriminated against as private landlords are usually unwilling to rent to them. So even if you manage to get out of an abusive relationship - where do you go?

In my case, I refused to accept housing benefits as I knew it would make finding a rental very hard. However I was self employed which almost seemed worse in their eyes.

I sat in a letting agents office in tears as the young man in front of me said that finding a flat was impossible for me as I had a fluctuating income, no history of earnings (I wasn't allowed to work full time) and "landlords don't like single Mums".

it was humiliating and I almost gave up. I thought that staying with my emotionally abusive husband could almost be better than the humiliation I was getting from every letting agent I went to.

I wrote one agent a long email pointing out that women who are that vulnerable need answers - not to be told they are better off staying where they are. I was told they run a business not a charity. A fair enough perspective I suppose.

In the end I paid huge fees, a high deposit and found one agent that would allow me to rent from them. I had to jump through hoops and it was one of the most stressful times of my life.

Forcing landlords to accept housing benefits claimants and not discriminating based on self employment would improve the situation vastly. After all, women take on self employment and part time work so that they can care for their children.

It causes cognitive dissonance along with all the other untold harm from being abused.

Yes, and it also means untold further harm because it's not just the police you can't involve - it's all agencies who are required to report safeguarding concerns. You can't let the school find out. You can't go to your GP for stress and anxiety or A&E for injuries unless you can lie effectively. Because if anyone finds out, bye bye kids.

The Children Act was written with the assumption that women would have the means to leave - sufficient social security, accessible services, etc. Now those have been removed, even our child protection legislation has the unintended consequence of further abusing abused women.

This is intersectionality as written about and envisaged by Crenshaw - how institutions and legal frameworks can come together to disadvantage particular groups of women (in this case, working class/poor women without private resources to call on).

The more I read MN the more I realise how much we all have in common, individually we are told our experiences are complex and one offs which creates more feelings of isolation. The cycle perpetuates. The more isolated you are the more vulnerable.

This!! It's important for us to have a meeting space and share our stories to reduce the isolation, shame and stigma many feel, through thinking or being shunned into believing, that we are on our own. We are not. Our collective experience reinforces there is a systemic attack against women happening. Roof, food, social and financial support - it's not a lot to ask and many countries have managed to provide them - but not the the UK, Australia and the USA - where most the psychopaths are...

The Children Act was written with the assumption that women would have the means to leave - sufficient social security, accessible services, etc. Now those have been removed, even our child protection legislation has the unintended consequence of further abusing abused women.
Yes the silencing and the double bind - such a bloody woman trap

This is intersectionality as written about and envisaged by Crenshaw - how institutions and legal frameworks can come together to disadvantage particular groups of women (in this case, working class/poor women without private resources to call on).

How her work has been bastardised by MRAs -

Fuck too many shocks today - this thread the, tech abuse one and VAW costing UK as much as spent on defence - fuck fuck fuck

Can't read it as its behind a paywall but its indicitive of an out of touch, mostly men government. Particularly pernicious is the refusal to split UC, it would cost nothing and protect so many women and children. I wonder how many women were part of the Tory vote last week.

gluteustothemax ahh see that's where I went wrong before! I had one years ago in a fake name and I was popping up on the people you may know of friends, colleagues pages. Must have got the privacy settings wrong also I won't add friends this time.

Sorry you've had experiences of poor empathy skills from people. In jobs, even caring or responsible ones, empathy is almost discouraged from the bosses/work culture. I hope your safe from harm now and doing well despite the set back.

Grey - definitely don't add friends. However, you MAY pop up on other people's friend suggestions. I do all the time, but I don't know anyone! I said I lived somewhere else too. Different school etc.

I get 100 notifications of 'do you know ?' and 'do you know ?'

Occasionally it has got a friend suggestion correct only because I've been stalking old friends and it thinks you know them.

I think as long as you keep it all private, and don't add anyone, you should be fine. I have a group I'm going to join, which I am very excited about, and I couldn't do it if I was on there properly.

It's all good now, thank you

I have a lovely DH, and 3 children. Occasionally I worry about past people etc, but mostly I just get on with life happily now.

Yes, poor empathy exists everywhere. Sadly. I've learnt lack of empathy is really bad in police officers, and midwives. TBH, anyone in the caring profession! As well as attracting the lovely empathetic ones, because of the caring nature, it also attracts the narcissistic ones because of the position of power.

My kids have it drummed into them all the time. Red flags! Watch out for this! Watch out for that! Look at actions, not just words etc etc.

My worst fear is that they meet an abuser. It ain't all cupcakes and rainbows most people are nice bullshit so I've prepared them to spot the ones that lack empathy in particular.

I agree it's ridiculous. My friend who has recently left her abusive partner is in that excavation situation. No god she is able to live at her grans house for now because she literally has zero money

That double bind is classic psychological abuse and the weapon of psychopaths - damned if you do and damned if you don't. It causes cognitive dissonance along with all the other untold harm from being abused. And this is serious mind tampering stuff.

YY. Horrible. I felt pretty trapped but at least I didn't have children to worry about.

How's this for fun, left abusive partner, moved in with abusive parents, who told me they'd had enough of me living there so went back to abusive partner.

Took another 18 months to get out again.

You know what saved me? Tax credits. I started small business from home (which ex hated as it meant I had some money), and finding out tax credits would top me up; I knew leaving was possible.

I don't think UC will be that option.

"The Children Act was written with the assumption that women would have the means to leave - sufficient social security, accessible services, etc. Now those have been removed, even our child protection legislation has the unintended consequence of further abusing abused women"

Excellent and horrific point.

I don't think UC will be that option.

No, because for years they have planned to go after self employed sole traders and underemployed people and make them jump through the same hoops as jobseekers.

No, because for years they have planned to go after self employed sole traders and underemployed people and make them jump through the same hoops as jobseekers.

Yes: conditionality = control of poor people.

If UC had been in place 10 years ago, I’d be dead.

That’s not over dramatic, it’s the truth. XH would have killed me, and the only reason I got out was being able to squirrel away money from CTC/WTC until I had enough to bolt. We (DS1 and I) never saw XHs wages, so the little we had was from CB/TC. It enabled me to go, if it had all been in his account I wouldn’t have been able to.

I had no family ties (he’d ruined that) and no friends.

I hate UC, I hate that it’s trapping even more women and children in ever more vulnerable situations and there is no way out.

I remember this being flagged up at the time. Probably discussed on here during the Frothers days of early Tory government. The Tories didn't care and went ahead anyway.

Not really about the split payment system, but I am a single working mother on UC in private rented accommodation.

Despite managing fine with my children and working previous to UC, I have been forced into the sex industry just to survive and pay basic bills since being on uc.

This is not a joke, I wish it was. I have developed depression, severe anxiety and my self worth is really low. I am just about managing to keep working, because if I don't it will mean even less money and more sex work.

The reasons I have ended up in this situation on Universal Credit -

1. I am £30 a week worse off anyway than on the old system, despite no changes of circumstances, just by virtue of being on uc.

2. Previously I was paying back council tax arrears directly to council tax at £15 a month. Since on UC, £140 amonth is now being taken from my payment from uc for council tax debts before I even receive anything. Huge jump. This happens to a lot of people and is madness the amounts they deduct from people already struggling.

3. I am paying back £60 a month also to the loan you have to take out from uc to live on during the 5 week wait with no money. Unless you want to live on thin air for 5 weeks you must take out this loan.

4. Childcare under the UC system has to be paid upfront by the claimant first, then claimed back from uc (they pay back up to 85% they claim). This has serious implications for women's employment. I don't know anyone on minimum wage who can afford 100s upfront to pay for childcare. In many instances uc doesn't even reimburse, it's a fight with them every single month to be reimbursed. I am still paying back a loan I took out (again from uc) in order to pay the month in advance when I went onto uc. Yes if uc are starting to sound a bit like loan sharks here then that's because they are!!. Previous system I'd report and prove childcare costs and they would be paid into my account for me to pay childcare.

I am hundreds of £s a month down, with no change of circumstances from before. In private rented accommodation, so I need to pay my rent every month, they don't give any leeway like social housing might. I budget and budget, don't drive, drink, go out, we eat cheaply and go to food banks (as UC staff are TOLD to tell desperate claimants to do), but we just cannot survive being hundreds a month down from before.

I feel numb and resigned. But I still have some fight left in me. I believe Universal Credit itself needs reform. And soon, before more women end up like me.

@ashamedofthis2 I don’t know what to say, but I’m listening and I hear you.

Smeddum ashamedofthis2

rememberthetime

So sorry to hear about your renting horrors. I had similar problems due to credit scoring. I had to pay 9 months rent in advance plus 1.5 months deposit. £10500 before I was allowed to move into a private rental. The only reason I was able to do this was because I had a credit card. I'm still paying the interest. What if you don't have a credit card?

ashamedofthis2

I really feel for you. This system is a disgrace.

ashamedofthis I’m beyond words, listening to what you are going through. You are holding everything together for your kids but it’s not fair that there is no safety net for you and you are forced to do something that is damaging to your mental health to make ends meet.
Is there any opportunity to get a council flat / social housing?
This horror of a system needs to be changed

This is very shocking.
What can we do to raise awareness about this?
I do not have personal experience of claiming benefits since uc was started. I just don’t think a lot of people know what it’s like now.
We have to make ourselves heard somehow, make the Tory govt shamed into taking some action like what happened when the news broke about revoking citizenship for the Windrush generation pensioners.
I feel sick about this.

Thanks QuarksandLeptons (I was going to write lemons!!). My Kids are all that is keeping me going, I cannot see them hungry or with no home so I just have to keep going. But my mental health is being damaged for sure. I feel disjointed. And my physical health is being impacted too, have had some 'mild' violence doing this and I fear in case worse was to happen. and constantly worrying about the hpv risk. I have a citizen's advice worker and GP referring for counselling, but I am too scared to tell them the full story for fear of social involvement with my Kid's (although it's far from home when I 'work'). Also scared of my real job finding out.

I am on the lists for social housing. My flat is damp in places so that helps my points, but I have no other points for overcrowding or anything like that so I will wait a while. I used to have a council house with my abusive ex, but left in 2008 to move away and got this private place.

Yes, it needs changed. There are statistics that show Universal Credit is adversely impacting women more so than any other group, particularly single mothers. I don't know what we can do, but something needs to be done. I've no idea how they are getting away with this. I am too scared of repercussions to go public with what I have been forced into due to UC that I never was before, it's like silencing/shaming. I am glad there are some spaces which are listening.

I am so sorry ashamedofthis and am absolutely disgusted that you have been reduced to this by the fucking Government and Iain Duncan Cuntheads vanity project

Are there any demos planned? I'm fucking coming if there is. Please post if you know of one.
I'm standing shoulder to shoulder with you ashamed and will do what I can to help x