Uncomfortable about unisex toilets at work

[Onlyinanemergency]

My workplace is moving to new premises and all the toilets are to be unisex. Apparently the bathrooms consist of several floor-to-ceiling cubicals opening out onto shared sinks. There is then a large window onto a public corridor so that the sink area can be seen from outside the bathroom. There are 3 of these bathrooms, one on each floor of the building, as well as 3 single disabled toilets. The architects have obviously put a lot of thought into creating toilets which are unisex but also fairly safe and private, yet I still feel really uncomfortable about the idea. Particularly about not being given a choice. Am I wrong?

On a recent visit to Longleat I noticed the toilets in the eating area have now gone unisex. The sinks are in the cubicles. Not really keen on the idea due to the piss factor but was also more concerned letting my DD go to the toilet on her own. Seems crazy but just had visions of a man grabbing her and pulling her into a cubicle. Probably totally silly but worried me nonetheless.

Not entirely relevant to OP but more to the general discussion...
I have a friend working with school truants - they have had increased problems since the high school have put unisex toilets in. Many girls who were not previously a problem are not attending school when they have their period or are leaving part way through the day.

Bewilderness

I was responding to a quote that suggested that the ONLY reason a window might be included was for reasons of risk. I simply pointed out that there could be other reasons, such as at my own workplace.

Throughout the thread, people were giving thoughts about the situation often backed up by their own experiences of similar situations. I did the same. Quite why you decided to highlight mine over others, who knows.

Many others, including myself, have said that they do have unisex toilets and have found the situation fine.

If you don't agree with unisex toilets, that's fine. You don't have to. Just like those who have found the situation to be okay, even after initial concerns should be allowed to express their thoughts.

To disagree with you, or to back up ones comments with real life examples, is categorically NOT a form of trolling.

I'd be more bothered about menstrual blood in a sink than pee on the floor tbh. All our toilets are unisex (NHS) and only once ever have I seen the seat left up an pee all round the rim. The men I work with leave the toilets as clean as we do.

The dirtiest toilets I've ever come across were ones we shared with female medical students, they were really dirty surprisingly.

Many girls who were not previously a problem are not attending school when they have their period or are leaving part way through the day

That needs to be addressed obviously. That is quite different from a workplace involving adults.

Do women go into the cubicle, remove underwear, remove their full mooncup, pull up underwear, exit cubicle, empty mooncup, rinse mooncup, wash hands, take empty mooncup into cubicle, remove underwear, insert mooncup, replace underwear, exit cubicle, wash hands, leave bathroom?

I don’t think they do, no. I used to have a mooncup and apart from anything else I’d have bled all over my clothes while standing at the sinks.

Is it different though? I'm sure some of the reasons are the same. I'm not saying I'd leave work half way through the day but it IS causing me stress and I'm not even in the new building yet!

I can't think of any reasons which are the same. You are a group of adults in a workplace- not a bunch of potentially sniggering teenage boys.

The only situation where I can see this being a problem in the workplace would be in relation to miscarriage or exceptionally heavy periods and in thiose situations I think the disabled loo is an option.

Only I'm sorry it's causing you to stress. Forget the for or against arguments for a moment it's actually just kinda sucky that it's happening and your not comfortable. To me that's reason enough for it not to be okay. I think we're all forgetting you know your work environment and what might work in one work place may not work at yours....you know your colleagues better than any poster here.

Having said that I am willing to be evidence A as to a reason why it's a bad idea!

Whoever said if your having a miscarriage just use the disabled toilets...there's no app on your phone telling you when its about to happen it just does. And disabled toilets usually dont have vending machines for pads and a woman miscarrying will need a lot of those.

This has just reminded me of working years ago and having to regularly go to a client's office - they were a private equity/investor company and their downstairs loos or the ones near the meeting rooms were single sex (this is over 20 years ago!) but they had frosted glass doors to the cubicles...

Apparently this was to disconcert anybody going there to pitch for investment, on the basis of any tiny little thing they could do to squeeze more investment for themselves was a good thing.

I wasn't going there to pitch, I was there to advise them (albeit not on investments!) and I hated it (as did others I went with). I dread to think what they would be like if they were turned into unisex loos. [massive shudder smiley]

Oh the drama!!!!

And disabled toilets usually dont have vending machines for pads and a woman miscarrying will need a lot of those

Are there really women who don't keep a packet of towels or tampons at work? It would never have occurred to me not to. I used to keep them on the lower shelves of a bookcase - any one who needed one was free to help themselves.

The prize for the most hysterical poster has to go to the person who said
"Men will wonder what the sanitary bin is for", and also exclaimed how mortifying it would be to have a man ask you why you washed your hands before using the loo.
Who would do that??

Also, really jealous of all those who have time to apply makeup, straighten hair, wash clothes etc. I'm lucky if I get a quick wee during a 12 hour shift...

Lass who the hell do you think you are? My consent, my daughter's consent, her bodily privacy, is not in your gift.

and also exclaimed how mortifying it would be to have a man ask you why you washed your hands before using the loo

Irrelevant to the thread but it never occurred to me to wash my hands before changing a tampon.

Lass who the hell do you think you are? My consent, my daughter's consent, her bodily privacy, is not in your gift

I have not mentioned your daughter so not sure what you are referring to; particularly as I said the school situation was different.

There are posters here however who might want to consider if they are serving their daughters well by their persistent determination that there are these awful. taboos about periods and dreaming up fanciful examples that a man might wonder and ask why you were washing your hands.

We have this set up at work, but there are bidets in the cubicles, so you can easily wash off blood or even get yourself washed if needed. I find it quite civilised really, they are very clean.

Yup Lass is full of logic wanting women who are miscarrying to know before they can know they are miscarrying and to waltz across an office to fetch pads -because a lady is always prepared- and then confidently stride into the disabled toilets.

Maybe people are commenting based on their lived experience and not making things up.

It never occurred to me to advise pregnant women to carry lots of pads at all times in case of a spontaneous abortion while at work.

Greymisty
Yup Lass is full of logic wanting women who are miscarrying to know before they can know they are miscarrying and to waltz across an office to fetch pads -because a lady is always prepared- and then confidently stride into the disabled toilets

Are you an actual grown-up woman or a teenager having her first period?

What is so difficult about keeping a supply of sanitary products in your desk drawer? I'm surprised all you feminists would not do that any way and let your colleagues know they could use them. I did.

No "waltzing across the office needed" - they are there to hand in the desk drawer (unlike the vending machine in the loo which probably be empty and/or jammed)

I am loving the idea of using a tampon from my desk when I was miscarrying. You haven’t a clue.

Gender neutral might be fine in a small office.

I had bad morning sickness for a long time during my pregnancies. I was often sick in the bin as I never made it to the bathrooms in time. Spent a large part of the working day sitting on the bathroom floor crying and vomiting. I expect that in a gende neutral bathroom my little office would have probably just assigned one of the bathrooms to me. But I work with compassionate people.

Nobody at all has considered how this plays out for Muslim women who want to adjust their headscarf in the female toilets.

It never occurred to me to advise pregnant women to carry lots of pads at all times in case of a spontaneous abortion while at work

This thread is not about at all times. It is about toilet facilities in offices.

It never occurred to me when I became pregnant to clear out the supply of sanitary towels I kept in my office because if for no other reason one of my colleagues might need them.

Before I became pregnant it seemed a sensible, grown up thing to do to keep a supply of products in the office. I am surprised that any adult woman at work would not do so.

You are obviously just better at womaning than any of the rest of us, Lass, as you remind us repeatedly, daily, ad infinitum.