Uncomfortable about unisex toilets at work

[Onlyinanemergency]

My workplace is moving to new premises and all the toilets are to be unisex. Apparently the bathrooms consist of several floor-to-ceiling cubicals opening out onto shared sinks. There is then a large window onto a public corridor so that the sink area can be seen from outside the bathroom. There are 3 of these bathrooms, one on each floor of the building, as well as 3 single disabled toilets. The architects have obviously put a lot of thought into creating toilets which are unisex but also fairly safe and private, yet I still feel really uncomfortable about the idea. Particularly about not being given a choice. Am I wrong?

I used to work in a closed area on the 6th floor of a hospital. The toilets were unisex enclosed sinks and toilets. There were three in a row, one without a sanitary bin, which was a bit of a pain if you forgot, or it was the only one free. Plus we had some female students from the middle east in the department who were strict muslims who used to go to the ground floor of the hospital to use the single sex toilets – massive inconvenience for them.

There tends to be a sanitary bin in each cubicle in my experience.

I would ask them how they are complying with the reg 20 of the Workplace (Health, Safety and Welfare) Regulations 1992
www.legislation.gov.uk/uksi/1992/3004/regulation/20/made

Not my area of law but I understand this provision is interpreted as requiring separate rooms (floor to ceiling cubicles is not enough).

I also find it depressing that the people who designed this who are presumably men won't have considered or been aware of the practicalities or dealing with periods

I've never even seen a mooncup but my friends use them and tell me you just wipe them out with loo roll in the cubicle then replace; isn't that right?

Honestly, the main reason I dislike unisex toilets is because (some) men are just disgusting. Piss all over the walls, floor and toilet seat doesn't tend to be such a problem in women only loos.

Whenever you pass an open door into a men's toilets it's always smelly and horrid.

This is all grim. I'm self employed but when I last worked in an office I was pregnant and had morning sickness pretty much all of my pregnancy and it was all day sickness. Unisex toilets are minging a lot of the time, with piss all over the place. It's bad enough puking up half the day without having to puke up surrounded by piss.

No that's not right Rat. I rinse mine in the sink. I find the loo paper sticks to it and I don't want that in my vagina. You also end up with fingers covered in blood. I don't want to be opening doors with bloody hands, nor washing my bloody hand in the sink next to a male colleague.

Ratrolypoly - techniquely should be rinsing with water, wiping can leave fibres behind which is obvs not great. Some women take bottles of water around to rinse them out over the loo.

Men don't piss on the floor because they are dirty or unclean - it's because they have a penis and if they don't have a urinal it's difficult to aim for the bowl. I think it depends on how well regularly the toilets are cleaned. Perhaps as my experience of unisex toilets has been in clubs and bars so this accounts for the piss all over the floor. Either way I think some recognition of the hygiene issues is important because it's a fact that men struggle to aim directly into the toilet bowl every time and some men won't bother to clean up after themselves.

The only way this works is if you have an office small enough that you can have individual toilets and people can’t be messy because everyone will know who it is.
I wfh but the office I’m linked to has three individual toilets with bins and sinks. Because there are only ever a dozen or so people in the office everyone is non anonymous enough to keep them clean. We also have a cleaner who is excellent. It simply would not work in a bigger office. The men’s loos are usually horrible

I would be querying the mooncup/menstrual angle and also asking if colleagues of faith are happy using such facilities. I would imagine not.

By the way, if there are no bins there are legal angles you can persue

Thanks for all the feedback so far. I'm thinking about asking if the toilets could be assigned a sex (unfortunate phrasing) - one male, one female, one unisex, or at least asking for one of the disabled to be made female and disabled (either sex if disabled) but not sure if I'll have any support.

Totally agree rocket. There’s a lovely cafe at a beauty spot near me that has unisex toilets. They’re just grim. Toilet seats always left up so you have to touch the (usually pissed on) loo seat to put it down. Every toilet is also a baby change so you’ve got the added bonus of a stinking bin in the corner .

I went to a posh do at the Met in NYC in January. They have unisex loos there. I felt really uncomfortable standing in a queue with a bunch of guys for the loo. Especially as it’s shared sinks so all the women were then touching up their makeup in front of everyone. It was also very grim to witness how many men didn’t wash their hands.

@Greymistry thank you, maybe that's what they do; I was a bit drunk when we had the conversation but I remember coming away with the impression that it was a fully "in the cubicle" process, so I've since been a bit confused when it comes up in discussion. Thanks again!

Well exactly DJ and I'm sure most men won't really want to see women washing mooncups or puking and would rather piss in a urinal.

I'm thinking about asking if the toilets could be assigned a sex (unfortunate phrasng) - one male, one female, one unisex

That would be very sensible.

at least asking for one of the disabled to be made female and disabled (either sex if disabled)

You probably won't get anywhere with this. There is a minimum number of accessible toilets required depending on the size and usage of the building. As accessible toilets take up more space than regular ones it is very unusual for a building to be designed with more than are required.

I have a mooncup, and I've just wiped mine with toilet paper in the past. They give you that as an option on their website:
www.mooncup.co.uk/using-mooncup/how-do-i-clean-my-mooncup/
I prefer to rinse it out in the sink, but if the toilets are full I'd rather not (for a start I'd have to wait for another free cubicle which would be a disaster as I have hemorrhagia!). I use the disabled toilets now, guilt free, as we currently have no disabled people working with us.

If they can't control their penis, they should sit down!

I've been on activity holidays where they have unisex toilets. The big issue is always men forgetting to shut cubicle doors when they go in to wee.

That said, they always reserve one block for ladies only, which is always very popular.

I feel strongly that this is a decision made largely by men which women are not being heard on.

It would be possible to put a very small sink inside these cubicles if there are walls between; there are two unisex loos next to each other at work which are much smaller than the average loo (doors are noticeably smaller) and they have minuscule sinks in them.

The big issue is always men forgetting to shut cubicle doors when they go in to wee.

This is my problem with it.

I do think there are updated regulations now on unisex loos (ie new buildings will have them) - what I don't know is what the regulations are or how they outline the implementation of them.

I'm sure most men won't really want to see women washing mooncups or puking and would rather piss in a urinal.

I'm pretty sure that's the case too, so wonder who's making these decisions, seeing as women don't generally want them and men don't generally want them.

Onlyinanemergency
The sinks are open, but the toilet is a lockable cubicle. They're busy because, and this is the only complaint shared by everyone, is that there are not enough toilets. The building has about 5000 employees and the bulk of the workforce using the toilets is approx. 80% female, 20% male.

I do not want to use unisex toilets.
I would march into HR and explain: Women sit down to pee. That often means touching the toilet seat when left up, or wiping before sitting, or inadvertently sitting in someone else’s piss. Some men can’t actually be arsed to lift the seat.

Then I would openly wash a mooncup in the sinks (I don’t use one but would start).

I’d call back the last user if he left the seat up/pissed everywhere and ask him to clean up accordingly.

I’d tell everyone who didn’t wash their hands to do so.

I would become the toilet police. And I would judge my colleagues for their toilet habits.

(I work from home and my sons are well trained in toilet etiquette, thankfully).