Why do you enjoy being a woman?

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I am happy I was born female. I just am.

I grew people inside me. I fed the ones that survived to birth using my body.

Female friendships. Women are funny. Those friendships and the wisdom of women have helped me to navigate the misogynistic culture we live in and provided love and care when I have experienced the built in violence of it.

It took me a long time to accept being a woman, and how it happened was I had a revelation that my feelings about being a woman were wrapped up in how I was treated for being female. Which had been pretty bad up to that point, and I had so internalised the message about being nice and not selfish that I had almost completely muted myself.

There can be power and strength in being an outsider or part of a minority (as I am in a male-dominated career).

As I get older, I care less about what people think. Having defied a few gender stereotypes in getting to where I am - and in making the life choices that I have - it becomes easier not to care about what people think. For example, I don't have to conform to the male corporate dress code and I don't have to be as aggressive and competitive as some of my male colleagues. I sometimes think that I have more freedom as a woman because, as an oddity anyway (being frequently the only woman in the room), I can challenge the accepted way of doing things.

But - and it's a big but - this freedom only arises because I have had some career success and have the confidence that comes from economic security and a decent education. It's not something that most women have at the start of their careers, or if they lack the economic and social power to forge their own paths through life (whether because of cultural expectations or being reliant on men at home or in the workplace). For me, that is why it is so important to be aware of women's place in society as a whole and to continue the feminist fight!

I don't dislike being a woman but DH and I both notice the challenges that I face that he doesn't (we are from identical backgrounds) purely because I'm female and sometimes it gets a bit wearisome. And looks like I won't be able to "grow people inside me" so don't even have the upside of that. Despite some difficult times of late I am generally a very lucky person but I think life would have been easier as a man.

I've never really thought about, just enjoyed being me. I've enjoyed trying to get pregnant, but not being pregnant or giving birth. Seeing the babies that I've produced grow up into adults has been the most amazing experience. I enjoy the close friendships that I have other women, and wearing some lovely clothes, but not feeling the need to wear makeup. If I was a man I suppose I would miss (besides multiple orgasms) having my DP to love me: that is the best thing about being who I am.

runawaywithme07 yes I agree word for word! I don't know what an MRA is though, some posters are saying you must be one or something but I don't know what they are.

I think it's a real, real shame that on a thread like this- celebrating being a woman- other posters are mocking you for your contribution. I think this is why so many people are looking at feminism and choosing not to identify with the word, despite believing in the values. Because now, unless we all think the same about being a woman- we can't possibly be one and must be a man/troll whatever.

Seriously MN- can you see the damage you are doing? Soon women will think they can't possibly be a feminist because they like pretty clothes or have the occasional weepy moment.

Endometriosis, for sure

Seriously MN- can you see the damage you are doing? Soon women will think they can't possibly be a feminist because they like pretty clothes or have the occasional weepy moment

If people read the feminist pages on MN and take away the fact that feminists think you can't like nice clothes and cry then I'm not sure there's much hope for them anyway!

Oh yeah sorry for doing feminism wrong

One poster has contributed these as her reasons for liking being a woman- and been called a man. That is definitely going to put some people off who feel the same.

But of course- don't accept responsibility! Call them stupid and say they had no hope anyway

From other posts it seems that poster doesn't want to associate with feminists and thinks feminists should be more supportive of mens' issues anyway, so I think it was a lost hope even if people did say it sounded like it was written by a man pretending to be a woman.

If your version of feminism is all about clothes, and men fancying you and being chivalrous, then yeah, quite a few people will be

This is an interesting read

I've been trying to think if there are things I specifically enjoy about being a woman and I don't think there are. The only times I've felt 'aware' of being a woman are when I have had negative experiences such as harassment, violence and rape. I didn't enjoy being pregnant, or giving birth, nor am I maternal, so the motherhood part doesn't resonate with me at all. I just am a woman and I think that my personality would be my personality had I been born male.

I just umm... am a woman. I don't really think about it.

I could list things I like about other women, or thinks I don't like about being a woman, but when it comes to things I like it just... is.

I don't dislike it, it's just.... meh. Nothing.

I'm just me.

I think that my personality would be my personality had I been born male

Interesting. I think our personalities are shaped by many factors but a major factor is how others respond to/treat us and I don't think that could ever be the same if I had grown up male. If i suddenly became a man now, that would be different as I'm older and personality is more fixed.

Just dipping in and out -

My DH would be pregnant and have a baby if he could.

I think there are men who feel this way (non TIMs I mean).

The idea that if you'd like to grow and birth a baby then you must be a man is sexist against both men and women - some women don't and some men do. The difference of course is that men can't, and most of them accept that as a basic unalterable fact of life.

The Sisterhood and fabulous feminists.

Must be a WOMAN

Sorry

I'm feeling a bit genderfluid today and it's confusing matters.

Being pregnant/giving birth/ breastfeeding.

I don't get what you're saying snibble.

Is it, "some men would like to give birth to babies too, so wanting them doesn't make you a woman"?

Has anyone said that it does?

Lot of people upthread were saying don't feel sorry for men not being able to have babies as none of them would want to

I don't feel sorry for them

But I disagree that none of them would want to

The wanting babies meaning you must be female is something I have read a fair amount of TIMs say. They of the intent upholding of strict gender roles.

I am enjoying reading views and opinions from women and how they feel about being born, raised and living as the sex they are. It's so refreshing. I feel like I have had men's views on their version of being a women rammed down my throat the past few years, I have had enough of that.

I don't particularly enjoy it but I wouldn't say I dislike it either. Some things are pretty shit though: Periods, harassment, hormonal contraception, pressure to look or act a certain way along with all the other shit that comes with being a woman makes me feel very 'meh' about the whole thing.

On the other hand my body grew and gave birth to two babies which is pretty amazing from my point of view.

I can't change my biology and I don't believe in gender so I make the most of what I've been given whilst trying to make the future better for other women.

Also reading thread

I am not v maternal either but the bit I did do quite easily was BF, did both of them for 13 months, I think that is my "mummying" pinnacle, other than that I'm not very good at being maternal although I think I'm an OK mum in my own way DH is much more traditionally maternal than me so between us we have it covered!

So BF yes was a time I felt womany.

Also agree that being a man would mean NO BRA which actually is nearly enough to swing it for me, all by itself.

Reading the thread the overwhelming positive thing seems to be babies.

This is really really interesting.

Could it be because this is really the only area in life where in the UK we are:
significantly different from male experience
and
it's not neutral or (usually) negative
?

Or
Is childbirth really a massive deal and miracle of nature and all of that and while feminist movements have sought in the past (necessarily) to say, we can do just what the men can do and we won't let this "slow us down" - it's time to bring back round and say well hold on look this is a pretty big deal, and now that we've shown we can do all the jobs etc, we'd like to start bringing the importance of this back to the fore...?

Or a little from the first and a little from the second?

Because of course motherhood doesn't make or define woman, yet reading this thread, you'd think that it did (mostly).