Impact of birth injuries/prolapse etc

[QuentinSummers]

Just read this article in the Guardian and am shocked by just how prevalent prolapse are. This is a feminist issue surely?
Timely for me because I have some kind of issue and don't want to go to the doctor
amp.theguardian.com/us-news/commentisfree/2017/dec/28/vaginal-health-post-partum-maternity-rectocele

It's a disgrace that those with birth injuries, my sister and best friend being some, have been dismissed. I knew someone who had complications post CS, elective, not emergency, and she was dismissed also. They were passed along the system and made to feel they were exaggerating the problem and one was deemed hysterical - she got her notes.

This has to stop.

All my births were 'normal', no interventions, no cutting. In the end I stopped saying this as it seemed I was boasting about having normal, straightforward births. I remain silent and I remain supportive of those who didn't.

Plus to all of you who had an awful birth experience and suffered consequences.

You have my support sisters. xx

It's terrible but Im not sure what can be done - c sections don't solve the problems and/or creates new ones, exercises don't help, surgeries often make things worse.

Sometimes these medical things are just shit and can't be solved.

Awareness is good but really the only solution is not to fall pregnant. Can anyone really say if they were more aware of these things they wouldn't have had kids? I was very well aware of these things (from being on this forum) and although I often cried reading these poor women's stories, I still chose to take the risk. Now 21 weeks and still cry most days about the pain and disability I have coming in the next few months.

there was a thread about this the other day - not in a feminist context

someone on there said she hid the fact that she was sitting on a rubber ring after birth so as not to put anyone off.

I think this is a real problem - women should know what giving birth involves for a myriad of reasons - not least so you don't wind up in an emergency with something happening to you that you've never heard of.

the poster made that "no one would have kids" comment which I find so annoying - what other medical procedure would you go through where no one gives you full information?!

This thread is actually making me think it should be taught in sex education as well. It is shocking that people have so little idea what happens.

It's also a feminist issue in the sense that so many people think women are just brood mares, would be horrified if someone decided to have a caesarian or adopt children etc. What is wrong with letting women have access to information and make their decisions accordingly? It doesn't suit the idea of "uterus in high heels" as Gabby said in Desperate Housewives.

Pie " Can anyone really say if they were more aware of these things they wouldn't have had kids?"

cross post. Yes! I know someone who adopted because of the potential mess to her body. And I think adoption is a very good thing. It's not like we're having a population crisis.

No, there absolutely are things that can be done to help Piewrath. Exercises can help, and even reverse minor prolapses, but you need specialist input. And you need to get in there early, so to speak. Surgery can sort things out too - there are other options than mesh, as people have mentioned - but again, the earlier the better. The conspiracy of silence and the 'you just have to put up with it' mentality means that many women suffer in silence until the problem is nigh-on irreversible.

And equally, 'pain and disability' is NOT an inevitable outcome of pregnancy and childbirth. 50% of women may have prolapses (of various degrees of severity) - that means 50% don't! If you are crying every day with fear about it before anything has even happened, you should absolutely seek help. Because that's another thing. I had crippling pre-natal depression and anxiety in all my pregnancies, and especially my first. In the last few months I wasn't functioning at all. I left the house for NCT classes and that was IT - the rest of the time I was on the sofa, catatonic with terror. I didn't realise that wasn't normal, and not one single medical professional picked up on it. After giving birth it was like the lights coming on again.

There are so many "things you wish you'd known before getting pregnant" threads here. Sorry to lump the problem back to the struggling education sector, but it's another demonstration of how biology education is lacking.

I'm not embarrassed to talk about mine, but I find other people are when I talk to them. I have found that if I refer to it as an "internal hernia" rather than a prolapse, people are a lot less squeamish about old lady problems.

Welsh, I have psoriasis too and have a nightmare wearing pads. They only fixed my rectocele (which still isn't perfect), as they acknowledge the cystocele will need surgery in future, but the longer I can last without it, the longer it will eventually last...

At the same time there is no point in giving someone the full facts when they are about to give birth. If they don't have the full facts then, then something is surely amiss in these days of information via the internet and a wealth of information via books.

I gave birth first in 1993 when the internet was not as it is today. I had read up on it, my sister helped me, bless her as her births were so shit. I was aware that things could go wrong. But saying that doesn't make it better.

Pre and post natal care effects everyone, the mum, the baby and the dad. It's not something to be dismissed.

I don't know if midwives don't have the education on prolapse issues, or if they just try to minimise it (ime - I may just be unlucky!). Mine went on and on about how religious PF clenches would stop/reverse problems.

When I saw (the nice) gynae consultant, he said I had a ridiculously strong PF, it was just that the tissue surrounding it had failed.

I think for me it's all these women walking round suffering in silence. Maybe having to give up work. Advised not to exercise and then being shamed for being overweight and "lazy".

Beltane18
Yes! I know someone who adopted because of the potential mess to her body

Fair enough, and good on her, but that isn't a common choice. In fact even people who have experienced these awful outcomes first hand go back and have more children.

This is so appalling. We definitely need a major campaign.

If I had known the risk was (say) 50%, I would still have risked it.

If my entire life of bodily problems hadn't been dismissed by a misogynistic medical profession and my Eds had been diagnosed beforehand, I might not have.

Pie - I'm not saying it's a common choice. But as the information is not really widely shared, I do wonder if more women would choose it if they had all the information.

As I said I'm more concerned about women ending up in hospital with no idea what's happening to them.

Yes, could MNHQ start a campaign?

Frogsoup
No, there absolutely are things that can be done to help

They might help some people but not everyone.

This is a feminist issue and it's terrible that women aren't even listened to or taken seriously when it comes to these issues.

But another aspect of it is that in a lot of cases once the damage is done, current medical science can't fix it, even with the best doctors. Some may argue this is also a feminist issue, as in why is no one looking in to this yet there are 47 erectile dysfunction pills on the market. And in some ways I agree. But the bottom line is, some medical problems just can't be solved.

Maybe not. But women can definitely be treated more sensitively about something so embarrassing and intimate.

Beltane18
I'm not saying it's a common choice. But as the information is not really widely shared, I do wonder if more women would choose it if they had all the information.

I'm not sure. But since even women who have first hand experience of terrible birth injuries often go on to have more, I don't see it would change women's minds. I mean if having it actually happen to you doesn't change your mind, what would?

Piewraith "here are 47 erectile dysfunction pills on the market"

not to derail but OMD!! This makes me wonder how many appointments at the surgery are being taken up by this - I heard something about a proposal to get pharmacists to prescribe them which might be a good idea.

Yet, there is a sign up at my surgery saying they no longer deal with emergency contraception. I didn't get a chance to ask why - hopefully it's because there's enough local pharmacies dealing with it but not sure.

Of course it can be fixed. It's just not sexy enough. Who wants to have sex with a woman who is leaking in all respects? Shut up and keep quiet. Never admit to the problem! A problem that is solvable because births are natural to most women. Some women will have problems, but they are fixable.

Breast cancer statistics have improved immensely over the years. Breasts are sexy. Cervical cancer is reduced because of medication in the form of immunisation. (not that cervical cancer was a killer of women to begin with - the incidence in terms of cancer is very low)

Well yes some problems can't be fully treated, pie, but that's hardly specific to childbirth injury, and it's a counsel of despair, it doesn't get us anywhere. Surely the main point is that there's a hell of a lot that CAN be done to alleviate misery from childbirth injury that currently isn't. So let's start with that.

I haven't rtft but I wanted to share my experience I've had 2 c sections, after the second I was left with a hernia that could fit 4 fingers in it and left me in agony if I walked further than a mile. Also after months of no pain, if I sneeze now it feels like my scar is tearing open.

Female dr has told me twice that they won't do anything for the hernia and if it's hurting to take it easy and the scar will hurt it's just one of those things

No referral made to an expert or physio

I know a man who had a small hernia (about the size of a £2 coin) didn't cause him any pain but was referred and had surgery to minimise the risk of it getting worse!

How is that fair? It like they're telling me it's my own fault for having children

Still in daily pain and unable to properly exercise because of the problems

It's all a symptom of women being taken less seriously.

Non gynae example, but I have had mh issues for years. No referrals to specialists, I arranged my own private therapy via my workplace for years as a sticking plaster. Finally got somewhere after birth of ds2, but then couldn't get past the gate-keeping mh nurse to see a psychiatrist as "it was just pnd" (despite having had depression, eating issues and self harm/suicidal problems since teenage age). Eventually I did go 'around' the nurse by speaking to my OT - diagnosed just shy of thirty with asd, which had been causing the problems.

DH went to the same gp feeling a bit down, no self harm or anything. Referred straight to a psychiatrist.

Frequently share this anyway, but I'll do it again...
www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/10/emergency-room-wait-times-sexism/410515/