Professional boobs?

[TittyGolightly]

I work in HR and have had a senior manager come to me today seeking advice re a member of staff’s chest. Apparently a few comments have been made that this lady - who they praise for in terms of knowledge and professionalism - has attended a couple of meetings recently in clothes which are too low cut for her (in the manager’s words) “ample bosom”. They wanted to know how they should advise the employee that they risked “appearing unprofessional” if they showed a bit too much boob.

I did the professional thing and advised in line with our policies, but it got me thinking. As it happens I am also big-boobed and take great care to make sure I don’t have bra showing/buttons gaping etc, but it got me wondering whether this is reasonable or not. We are very understanding of women’s needs around pregnancy and menopause as an organisation, but then judge part of their worth on how much chest skin is shown? Isn’t this part of the same argument around bhurkas?

Incidentally, I’ve never been asked to give advice on a man wearing a shirt/trousers are too tight.

So, thoughts?

Yes. It’s a headache. It’s the manager that has had a mastectomy. The comments about inappropriate cleavage came from others to the manager.

Manager spoke with the individual who took it very badly and is apparently furious that biology she didn’t choose is affecting how she is seen professionally. She was sent home early with a copy of the dress code and told to ring her Union.

Tomorrow will be fun.

It is no different to wearing a skirt that is too short or a man wearing trousers that are too tight or an unbuttoned shirt that shows his chest hair. No room for sexualised clothing in the work place unless you work in a strip club.

I agree, but where is the line? It’s subjective, isn’t it? One of my colleagues is menopausal and around 5 stone overweight (by her reckoning). She dresses in Lycra most days. It doesn’t bother me, but others may find it unprofessional. There are lots of short skirts and thick tights around the place - again, no complaints made aboit them regardless of the size of the legs on show. And the manager concerned always wears gorgeous dresses, but never any tights. Is her bare leg skin okay because it’s far from her face? Is her skirt being 3 inches above the knee okay, but 4 obscene?

Ok I'm off on a tangent here, don't shoot me! But having long good legs is quite a middle class lady thing and big boobs especially if you are petite is seen more in working class women. Studies that someone somewhere who I can't link to because I don't know who they are have shown that rich men go for taller slimmer women and poorer men go for petite busty women, not sure who goes for tall busty women, probably everyone.

Are legs showing seen as more acceptable because of this?
Rather than cleavage? A status thing? Yes I have had a glass of wine

This will also be why I can't get a rich man. I'm too fat and my legs are too short. Short sturdy irish peasant stick her. Good for carrying things though even though I'm short, just load me up and watch me go. Very useful in house moving me

What do you think?

Stock not stick!

Personally I do think cleavage looks unprofessional - although Theresa May is a current role model for cleavage-at-work!

I agree that the size of the breasts should be immaterial, but there's no doubt that a flat-chested woman can wear a bit of a scoop neck without it looking sexualized, whereas someone with larger breasts might show upper breast and cleavage in the same top.

I think the same is true of chest hair, which is partly why wearing a tie looks more professional in a man.

I know there's an argument for saying that no clothing is sexual and it's all in the eye of the beholder, but what we wear does send certain messages and as a society we are trained in reading those messages.

I can vouch that not a lot go for tall, wonderfully legged busty women!! I tried hard though...

Oh I'm sure you're wrong kitty!

Yeah I'm just talking waffle aren't I? Big boobs are just seen as sexual, end of.

TitaniasCloset you did make me laugh, in a good way. I am a middle aged, professional, working with all men and I have to say I am covered from head to toe, think jeans/trousers and sweatshirts. If I was to wear a skirt I think my lot at work would be following me over the shop floor with their mouths wide open!! It is a good atmosphere at work though, they do respect me an look out for me.

"Personally I do think cleavage looks unprofessional - although Theresa May is a current role model for cleavage-at-work!"

Gawd, a sad day when you have to cite TM in order to defend a womans right to be visibly female (including cleavage).

I also hate that word 'unprofessional' which is fairly meaningless, but too often means whatever the user wants it to mean. Let's face it, I don't see how you can have a no-visible cleavage policy without discriminating against women, and against larger women in particular. Which quite rightly should land you in a whole load of shite. If a workplace really wants to impose a 'covered up to the collarbones' policy (which would at least be not quite so sexist), then they should expect to get mocked for it.

Cleavage is not obscene, or inappropriate, or unprofessional, it's just a movable chest-related bit that women tend to have.

No, I agree that you probably can't have a no-cleavage policy, but I do think that anything that looks even slightly sexual does look unprofessional. I think completely asexual dressing looks best in a work setting, for both women and men (unless you happen to work in a job where you are expected to look "attractive" - which often does mean sexual).

That's just my personal view - it is a tricky area.

(I think it looks unprofessional on TM btw!)

Imagine if they saw you in your sexy draws though? Long legs and big boobies look the pest in sexy lingerie in my opinion, they have the best of both worlds. You should just turn up one day half dressed and have a good laugh when their jaws hit the floor

As a big booby girl I have to say even sometimes when I'm trying to look respectable they make an appearance.

A friend of mine in the police force had this problem, sexy girl, and constantly having to redo her shirt buttons to avoid looking like a stripper. She was called into her (female) inspectors office with the same problem too, but I think they handled it quite diplomatically. She was advised to buy a bigger shirt because "you are not a small girl". Friend was a bit gobsmacked but had to deal with it.

Drawers and best

but I do think that anything that looks even slightly sexual does look unprofessional

Define “sexual”.

Unless I wear a duvet cover to work, you’re going to realise that my boobs are big. Does that render me unprofessional?

I do think that anything that looks even slightly sexual does look unprofessional
What utter horseshit
A dress can look sexual on one woman and not another depending on height/body shape.
Much of women's tailoring is designed to make women look attractive and is the workplace "smart professional" standard
And what about high heels? Those are definitely "slightly sexual" and definitely appropriate for work.

Define “sexual”.

It is tricky, and I think people have to take a common-sense approach, because (as you see) what looks OK on one body shape might not on another.

My personal checklist would probably be:

• High neckline
• No shoulders on show (bare arms OK from the shoulder)
• No shorts
• Skirts knee length or lower unless worn with opaques
• Flat shoes or shoes/boots with a small (no more than 2") heel
• No clingy clothing
• No embellishments that point up primary or secondary sexual characteristics ( )
• Ideally but not essentially some kind of jacket

But I think there's a little more margin for error than that - it is a question of judgement (which some have and some don't).

To me, sexual has to do with behaviour. I "could" wear a boob revealing top to work (absolutely fabulous norks too) BUT if I go about my business as I do every day, I would not consider it sexual. If I leaned over workstations and desks or sat on their desks flirting, I would consider that sexual.

Unless it is clothes (or lack of them) coupled with sexual behaviour, I don't see it as a problem. The problem, as I see it, is the other people making a big deal out of nothing. If someone is not overtly sexual and doing a really good job, why is there this fuss?

Same with me and my big arse, Titty, but if I wear a red leather pencil skirt with an embellished belt and 4" heels it will emphasize it more than if I wear an A-line woollen skirt fitted at the waist and skimming the hips, with flat shoes.

I personally think high heels look a bit dodgy but they are considered professional attire.

High neckline

Wouldn’t hide my boobs but would make them look like they were around my waist. Not a great look.

Whereas I am flat-chested (with a big arse), so that's my personal checklist - yours will be a bit different.

I've a big chest and I'm a bit prudish I suppose about having cleavage on show, out in public anyway, at home and for dh benefit obviously fine, I wouldn't have dared to wear anything low cut to work because it would have definitely led to remarks from my mostly male colleagues.
I don't think it looks professional to have the baps out, but I kinda wish I had the courage to show mine off sometimes!

It''s a bloody nightmare dressing for work with big breasts. I should know - low neck, they escape; high neck, they look even bigger; shirt - doesn't fit, looks scruffy. Bottom not much help either.

One of my best workmates, who is nowhere near as good at our job as I am, got promoted because she is tall & thin, with dead straight hair. She dressed way more casually but it looked much neater. She looked the part, literally.

Straight lines = professional beauty requirement. Obviously, for women only.

I'm wearing a v neck t shirt with a sort of straight neck vest top under it. And I still have cleavage because of the size of my boobs and where they sit
Reminds me of this

Men just don't have these problems do they? It's a minefield.