The Orgasm Gap!

[SomeDyke]

Forget about pay and all that! According to new research:

BBC News Report

"The study, by Indiana University, Chapman University and Claremont Graduate University, showed the proportion of people who usually orgasmed was:

65% of heterosexual women
66% of bisexual women
86% of lesbian women
88% of bisexual men
89% of gay men
95% of heterosexual men"

My initial reaction, I was a bit smug! (Yes, we keep boasting that it's better with a dyke! ). But then my second reaction was -- a THIRD of non-lesbian women don't usually orgasm. Despite years of feminism, books and videos and movies and more instructions on where to find the clitoris ,G-spot etc and what to do with them than you can shake a large vibrating dildo at. And yet a third still 'fail' (Note that I'm, not saying orgasming is/should be the goal of sex BTW).

Are non-gay men really that crap at sex? It would seem so!

Reading on, it says: "and a belief in some men that most women orgasm from penetrative sex." Whereas apparently "Few heterosexual women climaxed through penetrative sex alone".

So what is it, do the chaps not notice it, why is this false belief not questioned, or do their partners assure them it is all fine, or just act really well (whilst looking forward to a session with their rabbit once he has fallen asleep?).

I just find it depressing that after so many years of effort, women still do more of the household chores, still earn less, and it seems are less likely than the chaps to even have a decent shag after all that.......................

Because women deserve better!

Bam I don't. I don't like it. Obviously it's not a never ever as i had to try it to know I don't like it.

Because women deserve better!
it's true

"Male orgasm is essential for the survival of the species. Female orgasm is not. "
Well, although the actual evolutionary history of female orgasm was still 'mysterious' the last time I looked, we do have amongst humans and other primates, quite a bit of evidence of the secondary purpose of sex (i.e. not impregnation). The fact that, unlike many other species, human females are able to enjoy sex when they're not likely to conceive. We see female chimps masturbating cos it is fun! Amongst bonobos (pygmy chimps), we see sex between males and males, females and females, as well as males and females. A whole group bonding, tension reduction or just generally fun thing going on there. A TV prog I was watching last night, we had a post-menopausal (I think orangs have menopause!) female eagerly engaging in sex with a younger male. Cos it was fun!

So, amongst apes at least, female orgasm seems as natural and useful as male, AFAIK, Although I will admit I have not yet seen a considered analysis of orgasm frequency amongst gorillas........(actually, I did look up a study across various primates, and admit that experimenters who manually stimulate female chimpanzees, well, the ethics panel must have had fun with that one! It was back in 1977 though......). Macaques, chimps, baboons, and female apes who have been measured to have the same muscular contractions etc as occur in human females. So it's an old part of our evolutionary history. Like tool use, the closer we look, the further back these things go (and those of you pondering about 'tool use' for sexual purposes can just stop it right now!).

As we have hidden ovulation we need some other drive to get us to shag, and orgasm is it imo. I don't buy it that women don't come because female orgasm isn't essential. I'm with dyke in thinking that it's something to do with power relationships in het relationships.

I reckon it's linked to the fact that a staggering amount of straight women seem to be in relationships with men who treat them as a mother substitute and general skivvy. If a man is selfish enough to think picking up his socks is a woman's job I can't imagine he'd be any less selfish in bed...

It would be interesting to know if the other 35% were capable of orgasm through masturbation, and just can't get it to happen when with their partner (so that is the substitute mothers, the wham bam thank you ma'am sufferers etc.) versus those that cannot make it happen for whatever reason (never tried solo, cannot get their mind in the correct place etc).

You'd think the % of women incapable of achieving orgasm would be the same across all woman though, regardless of sexuality.

I'd guess that lesbian relationships might be more likely to be equal with a knock on effect on sexual mutuality. Flavia's post made me think and, when I look back, the few unsatisfactory sexual relationships I had were, indeed,,with the sort of men who would expect me to pick up their socks.