Annoyed and I want to complain...

[MrsTerryPratchett]

I was presenting today to some new Syrian immigrants (I live in Canada). Two days on tendencies, renting here and how to avoid problems. It was all going pretty well; one day done. Day two and I'm just starting to talk about the law surrounding tenancies. When I am interrupted, rudely. Not by one of the Syrian refugees, but by one of the male housekeeping staff in the hotel they are staying in. He wanted to give some 'helpful' advice.

Now, I don't like to blow my own... but I'm a pretty good facilitator and I know a shit load about tenancy law. More, it was quite obvious, than he did.

Why did he feel the need to interrupt? There was a fucking PowerPoint FFS. It was clearly not just a chat. And part of me is also pissed off because the Syrians were sitting men in the front row and women in the back (mostly) but were listening to and engaging with me and my colleague, both women. This is part of their introduction to Canada and Canadian culture and some dingbat chose to behave as if a brief mansplain is more important than anything I have to say.

Am I right to be so annoyed?

AHEM

Wow! My first time to be deleted: After a complete stranger tells me and my wife how to raise my daughters.

Would none of the rest of you not be a little irate over that?

tell women on a feminism thread to fuck off and basically call them stupid.

*I did not call anyone stupid

*A person told me how to raise my daughters, I did not ask for that advice.

*I do not understand why the fact that this is a feminism thread means that I should not be able to share my opinion

booklooker,

You are demonstrating precisely what the OP was talking about.

You know that, right?

In my deleted message, I acknowledged that Mrs TP had a crap experience.

My only addition is that women are just as capable as men at riding over what is being said. And I say that because that is my professional experience.

How (please explain) does this demonstrate precisely what the OP was talking about. ?

(Mrs TP I have always admired and enjoyed your previous posts)

But your professional experience is of your management team talking over you. Not the housekeeper.

My only addition is that women are just as capable as men at riding over what is being said. And I say that because that is my professional experience

This is simply not true. There is a difference, an observable difference in the way men and women are listened to and how their input is valued. Men are considered to know more on a subject even when less qualified than a woman. Women are considered to be monopolising meetings even when they talk less than the men.

Can we please work on the basis that mansplaining is real and ignore derailers completely?

YANBU to be annoyed. I would complain to the hotel.

Good link, Lumpy and yes, we should absolutely be arming our daughters with the knowledge that some bad behaviour is overwhelmingly gendered, that the impact of sexist behaviour is not diminished by the fact that other, sometimes similar, forms of bad behaviour exist which affect both sexes, and that women have the right to challenge being treated poorly because they are women, even if this makes people who hadn't spotted the gendered nature of the phenomenon uncomfortable. Talking about how to do that is very valuable. Unfortunately one reason why women find it hard to challenge sexism is the expectation of the sudden escalation to an aggressive response which is all too often encountered.

In that article you'd do well to read this bit and boys should be taught to respect other people's contributions to conversations.*

I'm a teacher, that's exactly what I do everyday. I work very hard to ensure girls are encouraged to follow STEM subjects beyond GCSE.

What do you do?

Man interrupts conversation amongst women and makes it all about him.

If only there were a phenomenon to describe that...

I work very hard to ensure girls are encouraged to follow STEM subjects beyond GCSE.

Well, let us admit the hypothesis that bookielookie is the fabulous, non-sexist man. In which case, this discussion isn't about him but the 99.9999% of men who aren't so perfect, so he should just let us talk about those and stop interrupting and trying to join a conversation that isn't about him......................

Or not..............

Or he could just continue his sterling job of providing the perfect example of male entitlement and all those things that don't happen to him 'cos he is male, hence he cannot believe exist.

Like random (male) strangers in the street who feel obliged to offer comments and advice on your facial expressions, obviously just out of purely humanitarian motives and some belief that we'll get stuck that way if the wind changes...........

I'm raising 3 feminist girls who know their worth and know not to let boys shout them downou know, like you e tried to do to female posters on here.

Well done! We're in the same boat, a couple of differences being that I have my DW to help, lead and advise and also that I am trying to 'get the message across' to the approx 150 female students of mine in the classroom.

If I really tried to 'shout down' any female posters, I'm sure we would not just be on the first page of comments

Thank you Buffy and Lumpy for your gracious replies.

I will back off now, I am sure we are all fighting the same battle, but maybe from different angles.

I do not mean to deny mansplaining exists, and I acknowledge that i may not recognise it when it occurs. However, I wanted to establish that it is by no means a male only characteristic.

Hilarious - a live action mansplaining thread!

That's anecdote