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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Today my 9 year old has been taught that as she grows older, hair will grow on her vagina!

192 replies

Ziggyzoom · 24/06/2015 16:07

I raised this in year 1 when they sent a work sheet home. I can't decide whether to keep ploughing on or satisfy myself with the knowledge that at least my daughters know the correct names for their anatomy.

OP posts:
Amethyst24 · 24/06/2015 17:09

Hmmm. I suppose it would be most accurate to say hair grows on the mons pubis and labia majora. Not sure how that would go down with 9-year-olds.

I don't understand why it's not considered okay to use the word fanny for girls' genitals the same way we use willy for boys' - it seems the most directly comparable to me.

ChunkyPickle · 24/06/2015 17:17

If we're just talking about hair here, and not an anatomy lesson, how about we just go with 'crotch'?

If more specific is needed, then I don't think an accurately labelled diagram would really be asking too much though.

meditrina · 24/06/2015 17:22

I think that the key bit here is that it is in a lesson. And so terminology should be correct. Though of course, just as you can use stomach, GI tract, guts, tummy etc; common usage vocabulary can also be used alongside.

PoorNeglectedBike · 24/06/2015 17:25

If they're telling girls hair will grow on their vaginas, where are they telling boys theirs will grow?

Ziggyzoom · 24/06/2015 17:26

It was an anatomy input chunky the hair is a distraction - so to speak. My daughter knows the correct terminology, but she didn't have the confidence to speak out in class which is fair enough.

I take the point about the correct terms being a bit tricky for 9 year olds, but they would soon get used to it. My daughter has her own words to refer to her anatomy which is fine, I just use the proper names when replying to her. Any word sounds odd when you first hear it!

OP posts:
DonVitoCorleone · 24/06/2015 17:26

Arf at "here comes the vulva brigade"

Mide7 · 24/06/2015 17:29

Isn't this just the simplification that happenes in all lessons particularly science? For example using quad to describe the muscles on front of the thigh. Unless you want to teach 9 year olds the correct anatomical names which there is no need for

NorahDentressangle · 24/06/2015 17:32

Hmm, well if there was a case of child sexual abuse and they said they touched my vagina but meant the very front of pubic area when it might be seen as penetrative touching.

Misinformation for DCs seems nuts.

NorahDentressangle · 24/06/2015 18:00

....and best of luck to SW or police trying to ascertain what actually happened. Less stressful for DC if they use the correct term for the correct body part.

Springtimemama · 24/06/2015 18:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Magicalmrmistofeles · 24/06/2015 18:04

I have never ever met anyone who uses the word vulva in real life.

TeiTetua · 24/06/2015 18:35

If they're really getting it right, they'll tell the little darlings that hair is almost definitely going to grow on the outer labia and the lower part of the mound of Venus (what should we call that part, to be correct?) and it may grow up to the navel, and a fair distance down the thighs, plus span hip to hip. And it's all healthy and normal, and you're allowed to enjoy it, and so is your partner.

"Almost definitely" because some people genuinely have little to no body hair, and that's not necessarily a health problem.

AskBasil · 24/06/2015 18:55

Reporting for duty with the vulva brigade Ma'am!

Gintonic · 24/06/2015 19:05

You people saying that vagina is an acceptable catch- all term, would you tell your DDs that they wee out if their vaginas? Seriously?

Wouldn't "pubic area" or "groin" be a better description of where hair grows?

LashesandLipstick · 24/06/2015 19:09

Gintonic no but I wouldn't tell someone they wee out their fanny (the word I use) either!

ErrolTheDragon · 24/06/2015 19:47

It's known as pubic hair so surely they can just call it that for girls and boys. Using terms with a specific meaning wrongly is silly.

WhirlpoolGalaxyM51 · 24/06/2015 20:02

Well given that a whole bunch of posters on here (including me having read the posts) don't know what the outside hairy bits on a woman's crotch are called, it seems that some education might be in order, surely?

Little boys know their willy / penis and balls / testicles and girls have a host of euphamisms some of which are very strange and run the risk of not being understood by others, and a bunch of adult women posting on MN don't even have a bunch of easy, straightforward, understood terms at their grasp.

This feels wrong to me, like a bad thing.

So I would go with chunky's crotch (as it were) and then if they're getting anatomical then they need to get it right. Or pubic area as per errol would be fine too.

Thing is if DD came home and said this, it would conjure an image of hairy insides, as that to me is the vagina. I don't think it is common or widespread for most people to use "vagina" and mean the whole lot, many people say "bits" or "flower" or all sorts of things and for those people the vagina is, well, the vagina.

I think it's a real shame there aren't "friendly" names like willy and balls, that are commonly and widely understood and everyone knows what they mean.

TeiTetua · 24/06/2015 20:02

I wonder if it could ever be possible to say "Lots of people find the female genitals extremely embarrassing, and they'd pull their heads off rather than refer to them in any direct and honest way. So let's try to do better."

ChunkyPickle · 24/06/2015 20:03

Well, if it's anatomical then that's just plain wrong. I don't think it's like quads - it's more like calling your whole nose your nostril. It's a school it's raison d'être is to teach people things rather than follow the herd of incorrectness

Mind you I have a son that even at 4 insists that his nipples are called elbows (I have no idea how he came to think this

WhirlpoolGalaxyM51 · 24/06/2015 20:05

Actually and I do use vagina to mean vagina when I've talked to DD about periods (she's only little). Don't tampon instructions and things use the word "vagina"? I think the correct words should be used, really, otherwise there can be confusion and it's not the sort of thing you want to be confused about when you're young as it's all a bit embarrassing and you might not have anyone you feel comfy asking etc.

ChunkyPickle · 24/06/2015 20:07

Oh god - please don't let the grammar police get me for apostrophe crimes!

WhirlpoolGalaxyM51 · 24/06/2015 20:08

The grammar police are even more harsh than the vulva brigade ;

FadedRed · 24/06/2015 20:09

hair will grow on her vagina! Wow! At least it's not teeth.. Grin

ChunkyPickle · 24/06/2015 20:09

Whirl I just checked my tampax pearl (hate the environment me Wink) and it's purely pictorial. The only writing is about toxic shock

LashesandLipstick · 24/06/2015 20:11

About an equivelant of willy, isn't that what fanny is? A simple non offensive word