Motherhood, footbinding, and privilege

[AbortionFairyGodmother]

I've been hearing a lot of feminists on Facebook and elsewhere talk about the notion that mothers (because they are viewed as "complete" women and are seen as more socially acceptable than non-mothers) are a privileged class. I wrote this blog entry on the topic, but am curious to hear your thoughts. Have you seen these accusations of "mommy privilege" or "non-mother privilege," and where have they come from in your experience? Is this yet another case of men using groups of women to divide and conquer, or is there another explanation in your view?

omg! can all but 1 of these be deleted please

You can report your post and ask for deletion.

I don't think women should be paid by the state for making babies, if that's what you mean.

Pax, my personal opinion is that cosmetic surgery is not worth the risk. Some people have cosmetic surgery to alter perfectly fine bodies or faces to appeal more to social standards of attractiveness. I can understand the pressure that might lead some there.

But what do you think, pax?

I think having plastic surgery and botox just to look younger is madness.
Every operation and procedure carries a risk, as Lesley Ash found out.
She destroyed her health in attempt to defy the ageing process.

We don't have to turn into old frumpy women, but we should be able to embrace getting older.

I speak as a 63 year old who doesn't like looking in the mirror.

Not all plastic surgery is to make you look younger. Some plastic surgery can be for things like breast replacement after a mastectomy or helping burns heal. Are feminists allowed those options paxtecum? Also why do you think we speak for all feminists? Women are judged far more for their looks and in fact are told constantly, every day, what they should look like. It is far easier to get by in a patriarchal world if you pass the patriarchal fuckability test. Personally, I can't blame women wanting to do that.

Excellent blog post AbortionFairyGodmother. You've articulated what I was thinking when I was reading the posts on FB (again I think we are in the same FB group). I'd also say that it isn't uncommon for women to find feminism after motherhood as it makes sense of what is happening to them. Especially if they were middle class, educated women but not exclusively I just think the shift is a bit more apparent in that group. So there is plenty of evidence that the patriarchal force is strong on mothers

Pax, I don't think either of us quite answered your question.

" do women who consider themselves feminists have plastic surgery"

It's oddly phrased. Do you mean "is it inconsistent to self define as feminist and have cosmetic surgery?"

I would say no. As scallops and Lotus say, most feminists take some actions in the direction of meeting social standards of attractiveness, whether via make up, hair dye, depilation, Botox etc. I don't see any of those actions rules out feminist beliefs as well. I wouldn't be convinced by a claim that using Botox was in itself feminist action because choice, of course.

By either of us, I meant either me or you.