A few questions about modern feminism (Q3 might trigger, I don't know if it will)

[Burke1]

Hi Mumsnet I'm a man in my early 20's and I was hoping to ask you a couple of questions about feminism and gender equality.

1. Do you feel that men and women are equal in terms of opportunity, and legal/social rights in society today?

1. What is your opinion on quotas such as "This company aims to increase female recruitment by 10% over the next 2 years", or all-women shortlists?

1. I've noticed on mumsnet that some women view all men as potential attackers because something bad has happened to them in the past. Why is this?

I personally wouldn't describe myself as feminist, because to me the "fem" part suggests it's a one-way thing that only covers female rights and not male rights. Personally I just believe in "people" having rights because that's who we are, the fact that some of us have a dick and some of us have a vagina shouldn't factor into what rights we get. I know some people will consider that what I've just described is feminism, and while it's fine for you to have that opinion, my equally valid opinion is that it's not feminism. I'm not interested in an argument over who thinks what is defined as what, but I would quite like to see some answers to my questions because I am interested in this topic. Thank you to anyone who decides to talk

You might want to post this in Feminism Topic. Nice that you aren't interested in an argument.

have you read anything about the feminist movement over the last 150 years?

1. no.

2. I don't think it should be a quota - that opens us up to "oh you only got the job because you're a woman"

3. because often it's not just one bad experience.

1. No
2. Good
3. Why do you think?

Saying you're not a feminist because of the"fem" part is stupid. I'm still a woman even though the last three letters of the word are "man".
Feminism is about what you believe, not what genitals you have. If you believe that men and women should be treated equally, you're a feminist.

Quotas raise quality, unless you believe women are inherently less capable than men.

curt-rice.com/2014/07/03/2-ways-quotas-for-women-raise-quality/

The paragraph under your questions, where you state your views on feminism, comes across as quite rude and aggressive. This is because you state your views then tell everyone else they are not allowed to state their own on the subject.
Re-post without the aggression, and you'll get more thoughtful, considered answers to your questions I think.
Is it for a research project of some kind? If so you need to say so I think. Otherwise it just seems odd that you want to know just these specific things, but don't want to debate or discuss anything.

1. Yes completely, I'm 40 and I can't think of a single occasion when I've been treated inferiorly because of my gender.

1. I think if companies had more family friendly policies (flexible working, working from home, term-time or school day only working) then they could recruit/retain more female staff with families. But no, I think all woman short-lists are patronising and unnecessary.

1. I don't and I don't think the majority of women feel like this.

BBC did a documentary series recently on the history of feminism. I'd suggest watching that it's eye opening.
Once you understand the history of womens enslavement you may see why it is important we have feminism
In order to right those wrongs and improve the lives of 50% of the population which are still hugely impacted by the past.

Go read some books and stop expecting women to do your work for you.

"I'm not interested in an argument over who thinks what is defined as what"

You're not very experienced online, are you?

Starting with a very strange definition that seeks to narrow what does and doesn't count as 'feminism' suggests that you're seeking reinforcement that you're right, not actual insight.

Or, if a researcher, you're still in early student stages and lack experience of confirmation bias.

In which case, I think you need to see your supervisor for a session to remedy this.

1. yes in law no in society. If we were treated equally in society there would be no need for gender/sex equality legislation.

2. I support quotas to improve all types of diversity in positions of power. It shouldn't be needed, but in the real world, and based on my answer to 1 above, they're needed at present, provided the woman/ethnic minority candidate is appropriate for the position. Too many companies and governments are run by middle aged, middle class white men, which provides little scope for debate and consideration of different opinions and if the financial crash showed us anything it showed us that that particular demographic in the boards and governments weren't exactly adept at making the right choices.

3. that's not my experience of MN actually. There are lots of women here who have had heartbreaking experiences, but there's a big push in the "we believe you" campaign to stop blaming victims, but also to push the fact that rapists are rapists, they are responsible for their actions. I see nothing there that pushes the idea that all men are potential rapists, quite the opposite.

As for your comments that you don't see yourself as a feminist, why should women consider men's rights? Genuine question. Over history men have been perfectly capable of sorting out their own rights and continue to do so, so why should we derail our agenda for men's rights? All we want is equality, we don't want to be better or worse than men, just equal. Feminism has become a rude word and so many women are quick to say they're not feminists, it's bizarre. Feminism doesn't mean you have to be a hairy, bra-less, lesbian, man hater, it just means that if you want to be one or all of those things you can be and it doesn't make you a lesser woman (except the man-hater bit). HTHs

If you believe in equality then you are a feminist, or a feminist ally.

You're right, what's between your legs shouldn't make any difference to rights but the fact is it has for hundreds of years, and still is to varying degrees around the world.

1. No
2. Tokenistic, but necessary. See answer to question 1.
3. I haven't seen this and I find it a bizarre statement.

And as a man, your role in feminism is to listen. That's all- listen.

Lovelydiscusfish it's not intended to come across that way, it was simply to pre empt this developing into an argument of definitions of words. I know from what I've read that a lot of women think that supporting equality makes you a feminist and would be quick to point this out to me to make me aware. I was simply letting you know in advance that you don't need to as I am already aware of that argument, I just disagree with it but our opinions on a definition of a word aren't important. While my questions do involve feminism, you don't need to actually define the word to answer them. I do on occasion cause offence where none is meant and I do apologize if that's been the case. All I can really say is that if I wanted to offend you I'd have already done it. I don't want to cause any offence, I just wanted to make clear from the start that I wasn't going to be arguing over the definition of the word. This isn't a research project or an essay question it's just some questions that I personally have.

itsbetterthanabox in what way do you feel that women today are still impacted by the past?

Question 3 is from a comment I saw on here quite recently where a woman who was either raped or assaulted by a man said that she views all men as potential attackers and that men should understand this.

In what way do you think women today are still impacted by the past?
Where do I even start?
Women are less employable than men especially once they have children. Nobody asks a man how they'll juggle childcare in a job interview.

2 women a week are murdered in the UK by partners or ex partners - many men still think they "own" women.

1 in 4 women can be expected to be raped or sexually assaulted during their lifetime, and nobody seems to care or get justice. Women victims are seen as untrustworthy witnesses.

Women regularly face sexual harassment just walking down the street or getting public transport, many people think we should be flattered.

When women reach positions of power, the media still focusses on what they look like and what they're wearing over what they do or say. That doesn't happen to men.

I could go on.

Fwiw I also think that there are sometimes unfair expectations of men in society too. As much as I hate hearing what women should/shouldn't be like, I also hate hearing the same about men. People are people and should be seen thus.

You are not a feminist.

If you were, you wouldn't think women on the Internet would be stupid enough to be tricked into doing your homework for you.

Either be honest with your intentions or go do your own research.

IAnything I'd like to say has already been covered by Hooty whose posts I think are excellent.

1. No
2. No, it should be done on merit, not genitals
3. I don't know of anyone who has been sexually harrassed/raped personally. It is quite possible that I do but they haven't said but as far as I'm aware it is not normal for men to do this. If I was a lone woman with a group of men then it wouldn't cross my mind that there would be a potential problem.

Did you read the link above? Or do you only want to read things that some woman has spent time personally crafting just for you?

OP are you focussing on the UK here, or are you taking a global view?

If the latter, the answer to question 1 become a little more obvious.

On point 3, this might help.